Originally Posted by Beene
Hi Ladies! I am Russian and take great offense to a lot of the stereotypes perpetuated in this thread. Your MILs are individuals, are PEOPLE. It isn't like asking what to feed your pet goldfish. You make it sound as though a monster is visiting you. It is hard enough dealing with a MIL in any case, but the stereotypes only perpetuate misunderstanding and fear. Of course there are cultural differences, but your MIL is not dumb, deaf, or mute (I assume), so why not discuss these differences with her once they become apparent? What happened to sharing in cultures? Why don't you ask your husband what his mother is like as a PERSON, not a distilled stereotype. Someone wake me up. Are we still in the 50s in the midst of Cold War discrimination??? I would suggest taking her to the grocery store with you, asking her what recipes she's willing to share and having her pick out ingredients. There is no standard for what she might like to eat or cook. There is also no standard for her superstitions, beliefs, practices, e.t.c. There are cultural influences, of course, but they don't have an effect across the board. I know plenty of Russians who don't wear "house shoes" or "house clothes" or over-bundle their children. OH! And I even know Russians who SMILE ALL THE TIME! I happen to be one of them. I also know plenty of Russians who enjoy cooking all kinds of foods (just like you, I'm sure), singing all kinds of songs, e.t.c. If you are influenced by the rest of the world, why do you assume your MIL lives in some kind of Russian bubble?
Her MIL might not speak English or she, Russian.
I lived with Russians in the former S.U. for... oh, six years.
I love that a Russian is actually denying the notion of "national character"
You are the first one to suggest that of all the Russians I've met.
I love Russia but to deny that there are cultural attributes pretty much is to suggest that culture does not exist. I would not be surprised or offended to see a similar thread on a Russian board with directions for a person about to come to the U.S.
In fact, I HAVE! On odnoklassniki.ru among my DH's friends. And it was hilarious.
And nobody said her MIL was going to cook only borsch and blini, kwim? Just that she might like to provide for the family in that way. Nobody said, "stock up on beets and potatoes, hold the teriyaki." A lot of the advice was MIL stuff.
And if you think you can get by a Russian babushka with a draft in your house, then I say, time to leave Moscow. Eeeks, another stereotype.
|"Are you really non judgmental, or just pretending because your culture is all about being politically correct"
Oh, totally! I have asked that myself and I'm from here.