Apology was: Need advice urgent for 6 yr old dd - Page 2

[mamajama]

I was thinking a bit more about this. You said in your OP that your MD advised " Children's Advil and if she continued or got worse to go to the emergency room for x-rays." which is interesting because it is actually pretty laid back compared even to the responses here. So we're all still not just taking the MD's advice! Your MD essentially advised Watchful Waiting and I maintain that this is a great course of action much of the time...but usually when there is more information--especially when the chance is pretty high that there could be some serious repercussions to not acting quickly. Anyway, I don't mean to belabour this point any more than necessary but I felt I had to get that out.

[ernestholmes]

I am total non-vaxing naturo organic vegetarian everything and I would have had her at the ER the minute she started complaining about the pain in her back.

sorry - but sometime you should not wait - x-rays are a godsend when they are needed and your child is too young to fool around with this.

[sbgrace]

I'm so glad she's ok!
Don't be disappointed please in the responses here.

I think the reaction was because some of the signs your daughter had were consistent with things like spinal leaks and meningitis. http://www.meningitis-angels.org/ This site is full of people who thought their children had the flu and even those who were told that and they died within hours of meningitis. Look at the meningitis symptoms and I think you'll see why people responded the way they did to your post. They were reading and could only go by that..they weren't there with mommy instinct. I think the symptoms she was showing were consistent with something serious and time mattered with that. So hence the advice. Gitti who posted..if you look back on her posts...well, I've never seen her advise ER or anything even close! She's about as natural, let nature handle it with support as you can get. So I think it was the nature of the symptoms that had people thinking this was a case where traditional medical technology was called for.

But in other things I think you'll get lots of natural alternatives. And I'm so, so glad that you're daughter is doing well! I was worried. Moms do seem to know best. In my experience when things were serious and we needed to get to an ER I knew it my gut before we even got to the crisis point.

[runes]

Crunchy/alternative/natural does not equal completely eschewing mainstream medicine. It is knowing when there is a time and a place for it.

I take care of 99% of my own health stuff via alternative medicine, herbs, acupuncture, chiropractic, etc. But when I suspected that I broke my foot after a relatively minor fall, you bet I went to the ER ASAP, and was grateful for the x-ray imaging that showed the 4 fractures in my foot, which happened after I fell awkwardly from a small 5 inch high step.

It is great to hear that your daughter is recovering well, but her symptoms as you had described them before were alarming, and threw up huge red flags. She was exhibiting neurological symptoms (postural headache) after a probable trauma to her spinal cord, ruling out a dural tear or compression fracture of the vertebra would have been first and foremost on my mind. If that opinion is "Babycenter material", then guilty as charged.

[Cygnet09]

I completely agree with kidspiration. I feel sad that I took the time to post what I felt was a very appropriate response given the symptoms that you gave us, which was all we had to go on, and all I get in return is a slap on the wrist that I am not crunchy enough. Pity.

[lovbeingamommy]

Originally Posted by sbgrace

I think the reaction was because some of the signs your daughter had were consistent with things like spinal leaks and meningitis. http://www.meningitis-angels.org/ This site is full of people who thought their children had the flu and even those who were told that and they died within hours of meningitis. Look at the meningitis symptoms and I think you'll see why people responded the way they did to your post. They were reading and could only go by that..they weren't there with mommy instinct. I think the symptoms she was showing were consistent with something serious and time mattered with that. So hence the advice. Gitti who posted..if you look back on her posts...well, I've never seen her advise ER or anything even close! She's about as natural, let nature handle it with support as you can get. So I think it was the nature of the symptoms that had people thinking this was a case where traditional medical technology was called for.

Absolutely agree 100%, especially with what Gitti suggested. I'm also very familiar with her posts and as is stated in the quote above - she's a natural healer kinda mama

In addition, my best friend is a N.M.D. and I read her this post and she agreed that in this particular situation an er or urgent care center is what she would have suggested. I also spoke with one of my chiropractor friends and he too said in this situation given all the facts an x-ray would be warrented. In fact, a lot of chiros I know won't even adjust you without an initial x-ray, and this is from some very un-allopathic practitioners. I am extremely glad your DD is ok , but I think given the facts from your original post that many of the mamas that responded did and still would err on the side of caution given the circumstances.

[KatWrangler]

[QUOTE=kidspiration;13074285]Crunchy/alternative/natural does not equal completely eschewing mainstream medicine. It is knowing when there is a time and a place for it.

QUOTE]




I am less alternative that most of you here. Hey I admit it. But you have to find a balance.

eta - however the more I come here the more I look for alternatives. I take this into consideration.

[prairiemommy]

I'm glad your DD is okay.

Also, in addition to what everyone else had said about using mainstream medicine when appropriate, I think that it would have been different if you had said, even in a later post, that you had found a clinic you were comfortable with and should you wait and watch until the morning or go to the ER immediately.

But most importantly, this is the internet. It is not a HCP nor a help line. It is unreasonable to expect anyone to be able to help accurately if they cannot examine the person nor ask for more information. If you ask for advice from other moms and don't want to take it, so be it. But to complain when people took time out of their lives to help you with the information that they had at hand seems rather ungrateful.

Once again, I'm glad that your DD is okay and that it was nothing serious. I hope her blood test comes back okay and you don't need to go the antibiotic route. Your ped sounds pretty cool if he did that to make sure antibiotics were in fact, needed.

[SweetGuayaba]

There appears to be slight misunderstanding whether from not reading fully or my writing but certainly something has been misunderstood. While yes I stated I was surprised by no non-traditional posts giving me recommendations or ways to rule out certain major things from home as I had asked my comments at the end of the paragraph where directly about a certain post which revered DR's not about all posts. Like I said that particular post got to me because I do not see Dr's as Gods of Superior Knowledge. I do not eschew all western medicine but I do not bow to Dr's or believe their credentials make them automatically more knowledgeable. Case in point recently there were found to be hundreds of Dr's in my State who had not passed their exam and were attending with fraudulent licenses not to mention qualified Dr's that give erroneous advice be it because of mediocrity or malice. I am sorry if that offends you. However like all of you I have a right to post as I think and feel.
The concern for dd, which I thanked everyone for, has been very nice. I completely understand peoples recommendations based on the information given and the common concern for welfare when they know the seriousness of meningitis or spinal leak.
As for the poster that expressed wishing she never posted because of my point of view I also wish I had never posted in the first place now. While I appreciate the concern I had no intention of what the thread has become. However I cannot erase the thread or don't know how so it is what it is. Everyone has a right to express themselves freely at least here and for now.
I am sorry my opinion of Dr's and that particular post so offends everyone but if you thought my comment was about every post in this thread previous to the update then you were mistaken.

[odie]

Yup I did only recently register, you're right. As I said, am only a lurker. I don't like to post here.

I responded because it seemed like you only wanted natural options when sometimes, that may not always be the answer. As many have already responded, sometimes, the benefits outweigh the risks. I'm happy your daughter is ok, however, don't be upset if you went looking for something and it wasn't there. Many of us recommended the same as those doctors based on the facts you provided in your orignal post. We're only going based on what you're saying, and those facts seemed very scary to me, to say the least. So, if you're upset the other mothers here didn't provide you with 'natural' remedies... that's unfortunate. They were simply looking out for your daughter, and you asked for the advice. I think we all had the same idea when reading your original post.

Personally, I'm not sure what natural remedies could help meningitis or a spinal leak and this is specifically what you were looking for.. sometimes western medicine is required. I understand you prefer other methods, however, sometimes it is necessary as in the case of getting an xray. No eastern medicine can look at bones and determine if there's a fracture or a leak, nor can it determine if your child has a very life threatning infection.

I'm sorry if you felt my post 'got your goat'. Not my intent. Simply stating a few things that I felt warranted to be highlighted.

I do want to reassure you, if you have extreme doubts about xrays, a quick search should alleviate your concerns about the amount of actual radiation your child will face, especially consiering she will very rarely have them done. As an example, a hand xray is equivelent to the amount of background radiation (this is radiation she will face in her day-to-day life) of just a few days. I understand wanting to keep your child free of anything unnatural, and as I said it's completely fine. I think many of us just felt her symptoms warranted the benefits of a visit to the ER room and xrays then just waiting it out. Personally, my nerves woudln't have been able to handle it wondering what could possibly be happening with my child.

This is all just our own opinions so don't take it as personal attacks, just opinions. And if none of us provide you with the answer you'd like, then there's no reason to be upset as we're all just basing our responses on what you have provided us with.

Also, I made mention of doctor's credentials since I've seen far too many times that people take other's words for gold online when you really don't know where their information/knowledge is coming from.. and it's a safer bet to discuss these issues with a known physician (western/eastern) then a complete stranger. It appeared to me that you wanted someone here to give you the magic cure and hoped you would have been able to discern between the possible misinformation out there. I wasn't stating to necessarily take a GP's word either, however the fact that even the naturopath showed increasing concern for your daughter is why I decided to speak up.

Others have said what I've thought in such a nicer neat little package. This is the best way I can convey to you why I answered as I did. You asked a very specific question, and we provided very specific answers. If you didn't like the answers, it's easy to move on. Don't frown upon us for not giving you what you wanted.

I personally know how uncomfortable it is to have a fever as high as hers and her fever not coming down was a huge concern. I was in hospital with mine and they wouldn't release me until it went down. Low grade fevers are good to help rid the body of infection, high fevers such as hers are a huge red flag combined with the headache.. especially after the fall she had. So I apologize if my advice was a bit too one sided for you, but I was basing my opinion on what you provided.

After all that, I will reiderate again.. I am happy your daughter is doing ok and hope she's back to normal quickly.

[dawn1221]

Originally Posted by SweetGuayaba

There appears to be slight misunderstanding whether from not reading fully or my writing but certainly something has been misunderstood. While yes I stated I was surprised by no non-traditional posts giving me recommendations or ways to rule out certain major things from home as I had asked my comments at the end of the paragraph where directly about a certain post which revered DR's not about all posts. Like I said that particular post got to me because I do not see Dr's as Gods of Superior Knowledge. I do not eschew all western medicine but I do not bow to Dr's or believe their credentials make them automatically more knowledgeable. Case in point recently there were found to be hundreds of Dr's in my State who had not passed their exam and were attending with fraudulent licenses not to mention qualified Dr's that give erroneous advice be it because of mediocrity or malice. I am sorry if that offends you. However like all of you I have a right to post as I think and feel.
The concern for dd, which I thanked everyone for, has been very nice. I completely understand peoples recommendations based on the information given and the common concern for welfare when they know the seriousness of meningitis or spinal leak.
As for the poster that expressed wishing she never posted because of my point of view I also wish I had never posted in the first place now. While I appreciate the concern I had no intention of what the thread has become. However I cannot erase the thread or don't know how so it is what it is. Everyone has a right to express themselves freely at least here and for now.
I am sorry my opinion of Dr's and that particular post so offends everyone but if you thought my comment was about every post in this thread previous to the update then you were mistaken.

It wasn't about you posting your feelings towards the response you got. It was the delivery of the message. I felt it was rude. Many people here expressed great concern for you and your child. Your response was "this is not babycenter". That portion of what you wrote was uncalled for and rude IMO.

People who come to MDC are crunchy or looking into alternatives to western medicine. They aren't looking for people to tell them to go back to babycenter. It wasn't nice.

Sorry your child is sick and I hope your child feels better really soon.

[SweetGuayaba]

After reading this last post I would like to apologize. I am sorry for any rudeness in tone or wording that was perceived by you. Honestly it was not my intention to be rude I just wrote my thoughts without editing which I should have done. Normally I edit myself verbally and in posting better but perhaps the fact that I did feel attacked plus the exhaustion kept me from moderating myself correctly. I guess I posted too quickly in reaction to feeling attacked. Anyway I apologize and hope that is enough.

Btw for anyone that is interested. My dd's fever broke today finally and the lab results came back apparently it is a virus no infection according to her white cell count. She didn't need antibiotics. I had no idea a virus could cause such a high fever hers reached 106 F. She is still sick but no fever and apparently the worst is over. Now dd 10 months had some routine labs that came back with some strange results and needs follow up testing. Hopefully it is nothing but despite having no symptoms of any kind the results show signs of infection. Again, I thank you all for your concern and well wishes for my dd. I do appreciate it.

Also for what it is worth I know that most people go to the ER for serious situations but I have known of some irl cases where most would have gone to the hospital but with good alternative/natural home care they have healed well. I have known of 2 cases of broken bones healed with clay and homemade casting, 1 case of a 5 month infant with Dengue and many cases of of different types of cancer which have all been treated without any western medicine. That is why I asked and thought that I might even find some way of treating dd. A trip to the ER is not just the Xrays to be concerned about for me. There are standard procedures here that are very invasive and many times unneccesary for the most part that you cannot opt out of without it being reffered to Family services and then a host of other problems arise. It is the way they intimidate people into complying with hospitals policies here these days. I have known many good families with alternative choices that have gone through such difficulties. So although I would use the ER if needed I thought there might be other options even if it had been as serious as meningitis. I am definitely going to continue to look into that because I think it would be interesting to have that information.

Thanks

[tiffani]

sweetguyaba don't sweat this thread, even for a minute -- you've just gone through a really traumatic incident with your dd, go easy on yourself. Threads here often take on a life of their own. I appreciate your apology, and hope you feel ok about all of this, it's really no biggie in the grand scheme of things! I would probably have felt a little attacked as well, but understand that that wasn't anyone's intentions -- nobody here really knows what they would have done in your shoes, because they weren't there with her, and they're not her mama. anyway, hope both your dd's regain their health quickly!!