I guess I have some old birth trauma

[NaturalMindedMomma]

I am really nervous about my HB, I believe in it, my body's capability to do it but I guess I am concerned since I transferred out of choice with DD. I had poor support and was very exhausted after 36 hours of labor. The back up midwife checked me and I had made no progress and she started talking "options" did I mention I HATED this MW and she will NOT be at this birth. I am much more knowledgeable and my DF is super involved and totally different than my EXH but I have this nagging worry that Iwill not be able to do it without the pitocin and the epidural. I wish someone would have said, YOU CAN DO IT TORRE! My MW assured me that this time WILL NOT be as long, but I guess I am doubting me a little from time to time.

[srlpenny]

I've heard and read so much about the mind connection to birth, if you have the support you need and really believe in your body's abilities you won't have any problem.
I had 4 hospital births with varying levels of intervention before my first HB and I read Birthing from Within. It was an excellent way to help build confidence in my own body's abilities. I think they even have classes.
Congrats!
Shaunda

[seraphim0517]

I wanted to share my stories, my first (hospital) birth was 36hrs. I turned down the pit and epi, but let them break my water b/c I wasn't progressing. I was sure it was from the fear of the hospital and that it was my first that it was so long and slow. My second birth was at home, mw said oh it will be shorter, I thought it would be shorter, I was very calm and relaxed with this birth and had none of the fear from the first. She took 44hrs to make her appearance, and 42hrs without making it to 2cm. Nothing was wrong I just take longer I guess. But this time I didn't try to force things, I rested when I could, ate whenever I wanted, and just generally followed my bodies cues. It was great, at the end I felt like I could go on for days more, and I had a lovely waterbirth at home. Anyway, I'd say relax, trust your body to do what it was made to, and listen to what you need to get there. A long labor doesn't have to be a bad thing, it can be pretty pleasant if you let it. Hope that will help!

[lthw]

I saw your post also in the due date club, where I've been reading a lot of posts. I feel similarly, like I have old birth trauma and lack a certain amount of faith in my body's ability to birth. I am not yet decided about HB but am seriously considering it. First, I saw The Business of Being Born, also read Home Birth by Alice Gilgoff (it's from the 70s but I felt it really spoke to me, and the author was a friend of my mother's) and some of Childbirth without Fear. Then I finally (after 4 years) actually looked at my delivery report to see the record of what went down at my delivery. Very healing for me. But a big part has been speaking with a HB midwife and also with one of the women whose birth she attended. They are all about You CAN Do This. Have you called any HB midwives in your area? They may also be able to recommend a therapist to assist you with exercises to work through the past trauma.
Good luck to you,
L.

[Romana]

Every birth is different. Your second is very likely to be significantly shorter than the first, although there's no guarantee.

Have you considered hypnotherapy? It is pretty amazing what a few good sessions with a hypnotherapist can do to release past trauma and anxiety.

[DahliaRW]

I had some concnerns with my 2nd (my first was PROM and hospital with PIT and then 3 hours after they started that an epi) and was a terrible exprience. It really helped to talk over all of my concerns with my midwife. She had a solution and workarounds for everything I was afraid of and that really helped ease my mind.