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Child Care Provider Pet Peeves - Page 2

post #21 of 138
I just got reminded of a couple more...

Feeding your child junkfood right before dropping him or her off. Very often, if one child is bouncing off the walls from a suger high, the other children will follow.

Saying you'll pick up before nap or shortly after nap starts, so don't put your child down for a nap, and then not showing up until nap is halfway through or almost over. Either your kid will be falling asleep at the table or running around the room keeping the other children awake while they wait.

If your child is doing something they shouldn't be doing, please step in and correct them, especially if the teacher already corrected them and they're not listening to the teacher.

And most importantly, please provide emergency numbers we can reach you at. Chances are, your child will not become ill or have some kind of medical emergency or injury, but if they do, we don't want to call 15 different numbers where we "might" reach you or "might" reach someone who can reach you.
post #22 of 138
OMG, as a parent, I cannot believe that some parents do these things??!?!? I mean, poopy diapers from over night? Snickers for breakfast? dropping off sick? having to bathe kids? no clothes to change into? diapers? It just blows my mind. I absolutely LOVE DD's DC providers. The way I see it, they are doing me a HUGE favor by watching over her while I'm away! I see them as part of my extended family!! to all of you for providing an invaluable service, even if not everyone recognizes what you do!!
post #23 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2lilsweetfoxes View Post
For some families, that is the biggest catch-22. If mom or dad does not go to work because she/he stayed home with a sick kid, he/she doesn't get paid. But, they still have to pay their daycare provider. Or the employer basically tells the employee that they absolutely cannot miss work that day . And they have no back-up. Grandma lives either too far away or works full time. All their friends also work full time. Stay at home moms seem to get resentful when WOHM want to use them as backup--"I stayed home to raise MY children, not watch someone else's sick kid" (at least that's the impression I get from reading the SAHM forum) We need better policies in this country. All this family-friendly rhetoric--put your money where your mouth is!!!! (We're family friendly as long as business is not affected...)
I agree. And usually, if the child just has a cold, but can function normally, I don't care. But, they will medicate the child and then act like they had no idea.

But, while it makes me realllllllly angry when the kids get very sick, unfortunately, when I go over what we could have/should have done differently, there really isn't much. By the time we knew that child *A* had the flu and not just a cold, it's too late, and within a week, the other kids have the flu. It's nobody's fault, it just happened.

Last year was horrid. We had the flu AND RSV in one season. I had parents who lost jobs over this. Those that had two or three kids, then they got sick, and after a few weeks of that they were fired.

So, I do try to allow most mild illnesses, I DON'T have the time to sit in a chair and rock one child all day. So, I tell the parents that Vomiting, diarheah, and misery are NOT going to happen here. But, mild colds, infections and chicken pox are fine.

That'd work out fine IF they would tell me, or even call and ask me first. But, they always try to slip under the radar.
post #24 of 138
Oooh, I thought of another one...

When I call you to come pick up your child - for any reason - come pick up your child.

Don't wait five or six hours to pick them up. Do not argue with me over whether or not they should be sent home. Don't pick them up and then try and drop them back off later in the day.
post #25 of 138
OMG reading this makes me want to e-mail my providers and see if they have any pet peeves with me. I try and make sure that my kids arrive dressed and ready for the day when droping them off, I like to stay a few and communicate on how my kids day was. I make sure that if my kids are there unplanned for something that comes up that i don't need to bring there lunch or lunch for everyone. I can't belevie what some parents will do when using dc.
post #26 of 138
So I'm not a daycare provider but a nanny but I still provide childcare. I have a few they're a little different.

The diaper one I hate. I get there and this has happened with multiple families and the child's diaper is hanging off sopping wet. It stinks and it's gross. I know at the current job its the overnight diaper b/c they use overnight diapers at night so it's a different brand and everything. EW!

Undermining my authority. This is my biggest pet peeve. If I have a rule everyone should have it. Of course lets agree on it. I use to have a WAHD. I would say one thing and they'd run to him and he'd change it. That makes it look like I have no authority and they don't have to listen. Or I tell a child he can't do something and then the whole weekend the parents let him I have to start from square one on Monday. Irks me!

Being late. I haven't had a job yet where a parent hasn't been late. Even fifteen minutes. I have a life and I make appointments or dates at a time and when you're late it makes me late and makes me look bad to other people. Be on time. Don't call me at 5 till and say you're running late that doesn't help me.

Changing nap times on the weekend. If your child is on a schedule and then you take him off I have to start over on Monday with a fussy cranky kid who is all off schedule. It's inconsiderate to me.

Leaving a huge mess in the sink. Or wherever. I hate going into work and having to clean all the dishes out of the sink just so I can use it. Or a mess of toys that takes me an hour to clean up. I make sure the house is clean when you come home do the same for me. I don't mean spotless but picked up.

If you have specific foods that they can't have and I don't give them to them and then you do. Then they beg for them and I say no. What am I suppose to do? (This just happened.) No High fructose corn syrup anthing and he's giving him graham crackers. Then their child cried for 30 minutes begging for it. If I give it to him I look bad. Grrr!

Ok thats all I can think of for now. Sorry for the essay!

Oh I remembered one. If your child is sick or you've all had the flu don't make me come in. Then when I get it don't complain to me when I call in sick. YOU gave it to me.
post #27 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by cak1207 View Post
Changing nap times on the weekend. If your child is on a schedule and then you take him off I have to start over on Monday with a fussy cranky kid who is all off schedule. It's inconsiderate to me.
Sorry, I think this one you are going to have to roll with. In a past life, I was a nanny. The families that I worked with, they crammed in a lot of activity on the weekends not only as their own family unit, but with their extended family as well. That meant they were often away from home and very busy and the nap schedule got a little mixed up. It is what it is. DP and I are expecting our first child, and even now -- childless as we still are -- we are crazy busy on the weekends....traveling to see our families and closest friends who all live an hour away from us where we grew up, or getting chores, errands and shopping done, or having family or friends over to our house, etc. If we want our life to go on after the baby comes and to actually maintain our relationships with friends and family, that might mean that on many, many weekends the routine of our life has to be shaken up a bit. Yes, that might make it hard on our nanny or daycare provider come Monday morning and I can certainly sympathize, but we shouldn't have to stop living our lives and cultivating solid relationships with our loved ones just so our nanny/DCP can have an easier time of it on Monday.
post #28 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Siera View Post
I absolutely LOVE DD's DC providers. The way I see it, they are doing me a HUGE favor by watching over her while I'm away! I see them as part of my extended family!! to all of you for providing an invaluable service, even if not everyone recognizes what you do!!
That is how I hope my families see me- as an extension of their family. I love their kids and want what is best for them, and I love it when the families treat me like family.

Honestly, I have great parents in a great center, so I don't have a long list. I just ask that you please bring in two sets of extra clothes. Even at 4 and 5, accidents can happen. And not just bathroom accidents, we also have the occasional spilled pitcher of juice accident too Or my favorite- kicked the soccer ball in to the grass which is now a mud slide and fell down while going to retrieve it, making them look like the creature from the mud lagoon So please, send extra clothes, it really just makes it easier on you. If they have no extras we have to call you to either bring some in or pick up the child. It just makes life easier for everyone involved.

And the other courtesy- if I call you to pick up your child, please don't try to put it off. If your child is ill, or if we have to close down due to extreme weather- please just come in. Believe me when I say that I will never, ever call you to pick up your child unless it is absolutley neccessary. I enjoy being their teacher too much to send them home "just because"

And I agree with the PP above me, when I was a Nanny, nap things happen. Weekends are busy for most people, so I usually expected the nap to be off schedule. It might make your day harder, but it is not something I would ever make an issue over with the parents. They have the right to their own schedule on the weekends.

I just love my job. I love my kids and I am blessed to have wonderful parents :
post #29 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by cak1207 View Post

Leaving a huge mess in the sink. Or wherever. I hate going into work and having to clean all the dishes out of the sink just so I can use it. Or a mess of toys that takes me an hour to clean up. I make sure the house is clean when you come home do the same for me. I don't mean spotless but picked up.

Oh I remembered one. If your child is sick or you've all had the flu don't make me come in. Then when I get it don't complain to me when I call in sick. YOU gave it to me.
I have a nanny several days a week while I work and I have done these things. I don't like to leave dishes in the sink or the toys a mess but this is my house and sometimes it is a mess. I do the best I can. This is our life. Many nights I have stayed up to clean so the house isn't a disaster for her but sometimes the best I can do is to make sure there is food in the fridge and coats and shoes where she can find them.

And yes I expect her to come when my kids are sick. That is one of the reasons I use a nanny, so I have the ability to still go into work when my kids are sick. Obviously if they are really sick I stay home but I will leave them with her even if I would not send them to a daycare in that condition because they can sit around the house all day or sleep or whatever. I don't care if she lets them sit on the couch and watch tv all day when they are sick. Also my DH works out of the house and he is around for back up, if she needs it.

I am forever grateful to her for helping us when my DD came home from a week in the hospital and brought a nasty gastro bug with her that we all caught. I absolutely could not care for my children who were both very sick and the fact that she was so good to us during that time has made me overlook a few of her faults. She even offered to do it without pay (which I wouldn't let her do).
post #30 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by spedteacher30 View Post
I disagree that a child should be on a schedule at 12 months. Our center tried to get them on a schedule at that age, but they remained flexible up until the kids "graduated" out (at age 2.5 or 3). If my child is hungry or thirsty, I expect them to be given food and drink. Even now at his preschool, snacks are self-scheduled and water is available at all times.

I do understand the logistics of keeping naptime and lunchtime at a specific scheduled time (in our state that can't happen until the kids are over 12 months), since they anchor the routine and are more labor intensive points of the day, but if my kid is hungry, feed him!
Wow, I wish my DDs daycare was like that. They are so strict about their schedule it's more like a regime! I have to be at class at 8:30 only 2 days a week, the other three I don't have to be anywhere until 10:30 but I bring her in at around 9ish. Every time I get there at 9 this one teacher is always complaining about how my daughter needs a schedule. It drives me crazy!
They also have very structured meal times. What makes me the most mad is that they don't let her have water whenever she wants. My DD is 16 mo and knows sign language for cup when she needs water. Half the time I pick her up she will have dark yellow pee and drink 7 or 8 oz water! I've mentioned it before and the staff just says that they give all the children equal amounts of water and drinks and i should give her more water before bringing her in! This never happened when she was in the infant room, only since she moved to the toddler room.
The last gripe I have is that today I found out they are using bleach on their diaper covers! They are supposed to be an ecofriendly all green school and they pour chlorine on the diaper covers, that really urked me.
Overall I miss having my DD in the infant room, the teachers there were much more understanding and tolerent of my odd requests. Thanks for listening to my rant
post #31 of 138
I remember one from my child care providing days!

Please don't send your child is fancy schmancy clothes and then get mad when she gets them stained. We painted, ate snacks, and played hard. Stains happen.
post #32 of 138
About feeding kids on a schedule, yes, don't send your kid hungry. I don't provide meals, you have to send your kid fed & clean. I give them back the same way. I feed kids when they are hungry, but you still need to send them fed! (obviously not relevent if the person provides breakfast, but I don't).

Don't send all food I have to feed your child. Send me an item of finger foods (as requested!). It's your kid who will be hungry if I'm giving a baby a bottle and your toddler wakes up and wants to eat but I can't feed her because you didn't send appropriate food. (again, parents are told to send so it's no surprise).

Don't expect me to keep your child up all morning so she will sleep in the afternoon for you. I don't mind if the child is up and happy, but if your child is not ready to drop the morning nap it's not fair to either of us to deny him sleep!

Don't pick up your kid "just 5 minutes (or 8 or 10 or 15)" late EVERY SINGLE DAY. It's not fair.
post #33 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Siera View Post
OMG, as a parent, I cannot believe that some parents do these things??!?!? I mean, poopy diapers from over night? Snickers for breakfast? dropping off sick? having to bathe kids? no clothes to change into? diapers? It just blows my mind. I absolutely LOVE DD's DC providers. The way I see it, they are doing me a HUGE favor by watching over her while I'm away! I see them as part of my extended family!! to all of you for providing an invaluable service, even if not everyone recognizes what you do!!
You'd be surprised the horror stories I could tell about the subject. Mind you, not all parents, in fact most parents, in my daycare don't do these things, but every year, about a quarter of my class's parents will do that. And consistantly. It's sad.

Quote:
Originally Posted by momof2kiddos View Post
OMG reading this makes me want to e-mail my providers and see if they have any pet peeves with me. I try and make sure that my kids arrive dressed and ready for the day when droping them off, I like to stay a few and communicate on how my kids day was. I make sure that if my kids are there unplanned for something that comes up that i don't need to bring there lunch or lunch for everyone. I can't belevie what some parents will do when using dc.
Teachers are pretty understanding if, usually you're on the ball, if you bring your child in with a poopy daiper one day (he pooped on the way, I'm in a hurry, late for work, can you please change it for me?) or if you're a half hour late for pickup one day. Things happen. Most teachers understand that. It's when it happens all the time, with no thought to how the teachers or the child feels, that's what frustrates the parents. I really can't see any MDC parents doing some of the things I've seen some of the parents do in my daycare.

Quote:
Originally Posted by annettemarie View Post
I remember one from my child care providing days!

Please don't send your child is fancy schmancy clothes and then get mad when she gets them stained. We painted, ate snacks, and played hard. Stains happen.
Oh, yes, that one. A little girl in my class a couple years ago always wore designer clothes (I'm talking Calvin Klein and Tommy Hilfiger ), and white sneakers and her Mother would lecture her at dropoff and pickup about getting dirty and flip out if we let her paint of play in the sandbox or whatever.

Another one is, if we say we go outside every day (it's part of our policy, unless it's below zero or a thunderstorm or some other kind of dangerous weather), then we go outside every day. Not sending your child in with a showsuit or a hat and mittens or even boots on the snowiest day of the year because you don't want your child playing outside, is not fair to your child (may have to stay inside with a different class while all his or her friends go outside), the other children (may keep the entire class inside if ratios don't allow to take some children outside and keep some inside), or the teachers (imagine a classroom full of 10-15 children who've been inside for days, weeks at a time- even the best teachers can't keep them from being bored out of their minds and bouncing off the walls).
post #34 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by cak1207 View Post
So I'm not a daycare provider but a nanny but I still provide childcare. I have a few they're a little different.

Undermining my authority. This is my biggest pet peeve. If I have a rule everyone should have it. Of course lets agree on it. I use to have a WAHD. I would say one thing and they'd run to him and he'd change it. That makes it look like I have no authority and they don't have to listen. Or I tell a child he can't do something and then the whole weekend the parents let him I have to start from square one on Monday. Irks me!

Being late. I haven't had a job yet where a parent hasn't been late. Even fifteen minutes. I have a life and I make appointments or dates at a time and when you're late it makes me late and makes me look bad to other people. Be on time. Don't call me at 5 till and say you're running late that doesn't help me.

Changing nap times on the weekend. If your child is on a schedule and then you take him off I have to start over on Monday with a fussy cranky kid who is all off schedule. It's inconsiderate to me.

Leaving a huge mess in the sink. Or wherever. I hate going into work and having to clean all the dishes out of the sink just so I can use it. Or a mess of toys that takes me an hour to clean up. I make sure the house is clean when you come home do the same for me. I don't mean spotless but picked up.
: I have been a nanny for several years now, and have had all of those scenarios. I refuse to work with at-home parents now because of those types of situations!! As for the routine being different on the weekends...that drives me CRAZY. Kids NEED routine. Not a schedule, or forced to do things when they don't want to. But every kid I have ever worked with does better when they know what to expect within reason. Do you think they would be cranky if they didn't need that? It's not about my convenience--it's about your CHILD. When you decide to have children, you decide to give up some things, and make some sacrifices. This means making sure that you bring a sling or a Pack N Play so that your kiddo can get a nap at the appropriate time.

I also hate the dishes piling up in the sink, because I feel as if I am expected to do them...especially because I do the dishes I mess up. It's not like I'm going to leave your stuff sitting in the sink! But I've had families that started out asking me to do my dishes...then they'd leave the dishes from the night before...next thing I knew, it was Tuesday, I hadn't been there since Thursday, and ALL OF THOSE DISHES were waiting for me. Once in awhile isn't a big deal,but every single day is a bit much.

Parents being late drives me up a wall, too, or changing the schedule constantly. At my current position, I NEVER KNOW when I am going to work. I've had to change doctor's appointments, cancel plans, or show up late to various events because my boss decided at the last minute that she needed me. The best is when she calls me at 5:45 pm and asks if she can be a little late so she can go get a drink with her friends. Okay, every parent needs a break. But I am supposed to get off at 6 and I want to see my husband!!! I need to go home and make dinner, and you still expect me to be here at 8:00 am the next morning. The child has three grandmothers, you have tons of friends, and a husband...all of whom could watch your child if you asked. Also, if you asked me a little ahead of time, I would plan on being there late and it would be no biggy.

My other two big rants are 1) Not babyproofing your house. I worked for a family that had stairs...and no baby gate. That baby moves faster than the speed of light, and he almost fell down the stairs because I turned my back for TWO SECONDS to wipe off his high chair. No guards on the electical outlets...glass stuff, expensive tv and dvd player at his level...china cabinets with no locks...stacks of books on the floor that he will rip and tear. I cannot enjoy your child if I am chasing them around your house all day. Nor can I take a moment to fix a bottle, use the bathroom, anything else because if I turn my back for one moment, the baby is into something. Also, your child plays best at such a young age in a confined area. If he cannot leave a room, he will play with the toys and with me, listen to or look at the books. If he can run out anytime he wants, he will head straight for the flat screen tv.

2) Leaving extra kids with me. I hate when parents leave a sibling, cousin, or friend with me with no warning and no extra pay. One week, the child's older brother's preschool was closed, and my boss at the time didn't even ask if it was okay. She left him with me ALL WEEK, without offering extra pay. She does this several times a month, although I was told when I started that I would not ever have to watch him. I gave them a rate based on ONE child, not two! My rate for two children is higher, and if I'd known that I was going to have two children often, I would've told you that.

And 3) parents who ask me to do things I just don't agree with at all..IE crying it out ('hes manipulating me!' no, actually, he wants his mother whom he hasnt seen all day to pick him up instead of putting him in his bouncy seat) or feeding a 7 month old STEAK AND EGGS!

Most of these pet peeves all come down to one thing: respect. If you respect me as a person, and an equal (I am not a SERVANT. No, I'm not doing you a favor by watching your kid, but nor are you doing a favor by employing me. I could work for many other families) you will treat me as such. You would be insulted if your boss took you for granted the way you take me for granted. You would feel taken advantage of too.
post #35 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by Siera View Post
OMG, as a parent, I cannot believe that some parents do these things??!?!? I mean, poopy diapers from over night? Snickers for breakfast? dropping off sick? having to bathe kids? no clothes to change into? diapers? It just blows my mind. I absolutely LOVE DD's DC providers. The way I see it, they are doing me a HUGE favor by watching over her while I'm away! I see them as part of my extended family!! to all of you for providing an invaluable service, even if not everyone recognizes what you do!!
I am horrified by some of these things I am reading, truly horrified. I feel sorry for these kids and DCPs.
post #36 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by cak1207 View Post
If I have a rule everyone should have it.
you're right, but i think you have it backwards as to who should be establishing the rules, and who should be making sure to follow through on the rules.
post #37 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by spedteacher30 View Post
you're right, but i think you have it backwards as to who should be establishing the rules, and who should be making sure to follow through on the rules.
Just wondering, but do you tend you notice a high turnover ratio in caregivers?
post #38 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by spedteacher30 View Post
you're right, but i think you have it backwards as to who should be establishing the rules, and who should be making sure to follow through on the rules.
Wow.

So if I make a rule he can't climb on the couch it's not valid bc I'm not the boss? I make sure all parent rules are followed but I mean when I say something they can or cannot do and the parent turns around and ignores it make my job a whole lot harder. Then you're gonna have a level of stress that there doesn't need to be. And you'll be looking for new childcare. I respect your rules and the same should apply.
post #39 of 138
I disagree with you both. Children are extremely capable creatures and are more than able to understand two (or even more) sets of rules. It's called framing. I think it's a Piagetian term?
post #40 of 138
Quote:
Originally Posted by annettemarie View Post
I disagree with you both. Children are extremely capable creatures and are more than able to understand two (or even more) sets of rules. It's called framing. I think it's a Piagetian term?
Exactly. I have no issues with being upset when the caregiver tells the child no and the work at home parent undermines the caregiver by saying yes. However it seems a bit silly for a caregiver to expect the parents to follow her rules and schedule when she (or he) is not working.
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