Nighttime anxiety? We all need sleep!

[LynnS6]

For the past two nights, ds (7 1/2) has been up for about two hours because he's been anxious. Two nights ago, he had a dream that there were robbers in our house. He woke up screaming. I went in to comfort him and he fell back asleep. But he awoke repeatedly, waking up his sister and dh and me.

Last night as he went to sleep he told me couldn't get his dream out of his mind. Sure enough he woke about 2 and was scared. I went in, comforted him, and tried a bit of guided imagery with him (walking on the beach, feeling the sand, jumping in the waves...). I left after 30 minutes, and he woke up again, and came into our room. And his sister was awake, and so she started to scream that she didn't want to be alone.... and once again, we were all up for a good 2 hours.

If he's up one or two more nights this week, I'm calling this ped and going to have him evaluated for anxiety, because this seems to be stronger than it has been before.


What can we do about this anxiety short term?

[BellinghamCrunchie]

We have similar, only very chronic, sleeptime issues here, too.

The only thing I know that works, or helps, anyway, to "change the channel" when the uncomfortable effects of a bad dream keep lingering is to engage in some competing stimuli... maybe your son can become more independent in dealing with the on-going effects of a bad dream so that the rest of you can get back to sleep.

Listening to music can help (having headphones and music ready to go by his bedside so all he has to do is turn it on) but often, for us, music alone isn't enough to refocus thinking. Books on tape work best. Last resort, putting on a 30 minute video. Occasionally I have to do this with DD (she's only four) - get out of bed, make sure the front door is locked, put on a video and give her a cozy blanket, put out a snack and a drink, then go back to bed myself. She will come back into bed when she is tired. The bad nights usually come in spurts so after the first night I get everything prepared (snack, drink, video in player, blanket) for the next night so that it only takes me 2-3 minutes. The spurt of bad nights usually lasts 3-4 days then her brain seems to work through whatever it was working through and we're good for a month.

Unfortunately, this advice goes against everything anyone has ever tried to tell me about how I should deal with nightwaking. Oh well!

Edited to add: melatonin made the bad dreams worse.

[LauraLoo]

You might want to try a magnesium supplement. We had great success with our ds doing this (he had a hard time winding down because he was going to have a bad dream, then he would have a bad dream, and the next night it was the same all over again....) He went from chronically night waking for months, to next to nothing in the course of a few days.
http://www.ctds.info/5_13_magnesium.html

The easiest way to see if this will work is to pick up some Epsom Salts and give him a bath before bedtime. The magnesium from the salts is absorbed into the skin. There are also plenty of oral magnesium supplements. We use Natural Calm.

http://www.vitacost.com/productResul...m%7C2861811011

Edited to add: That size bottle of Natural Calm will last you for a good 2 or 3 months. We only give ds 1 tsp./day.
Good luck!

[Surfacing]

[Peony]

My 6y has nighttime anxiety, along with anxiety in general. 6 months ago we moved a mattress for DH into her room, it was the only way that anyone could get any sleep. It has worked well, she doesn't wake up as much at night and when she does, someone is there for her quickly. We are hoping to phase him out of her room soon, but she isn't quite ready yet.

[LynnS6]

Thanks - I'm going to get some magnesium for him tomorrow. Tonight I gave him some rescue remedy and some melatonin. Right now he's worried about being worried, and I don't like that trend (I've had anxiety, I know the symptoms). He's also starting to worry during the day. We talked about "changing the channel" by reading or thinking of things he's really interested in. He said he tried yesterday and it didn't help. Sigh.

Unfortunately, sleeping in his room is just not a long term solution - he shares a room with his sister and there is little or no room right now as it is. Dd freaks if ds isn't there, so having him come in our room isn't going to work either.

I actually asked him if he would like to see someone who might be able to help him deal with this, and he was remarkably receptive. So, if he wakes tonight and the magnesium doesn't help tomorrow, I'll call his ped and ask for a referral.

[Magella]

When my son went through a period of anxiety at night due to bad dreams, we picked up a book called What To Do When You Dread Your Bed and found that some of the approaches were helpful. We didn't follow the whole book as a program, because his anxiety wasn't that extreme and we didn't need to, but I thought it was a great resource.

Also, counseling for anxiety is a really good idea. We had a great experience seeking counseling for our dd's anxiety.

Good luck!

Oh, and we found that sometimes, when her anxiety was extreme and she just could not fall asleep, a little kids' formula Valerian helped dd relax and get some sleep. Not every night, just once in awhile when the anxiety was really bad.

[earthus76]

I was there a year ago. For my daughter it was fear of ghosts that kept her awake all hours of the night. Wish I had words of wisdom to pass along... DD (8) is in our room on a cot. Any time we mention moving her to her own bed, the anx monsters - as I call them - emerge again. Sleeping in our room has kept her calm not only at night but daytime, too. I know that won't work for your family. I hope you find something that helps.