PG after IF or loss

[LibbyLou]

I saw a thread like this in another DDC, and I liked the idea. It took me 16 months and 6 rounds of fertility treatment to get pregnant, but now that I am I still can't relax. I'm terrified that something is going to happen to the pregnancy. My boobs weren't sore yesterday when I woke up, so I rushed to my Dr.'s office to get a blood test. I was so relieved when the pain came back in the evening. I just thought it would be nice to have a thread where we can share all of our fears, rational or irrational, and support each other through these early months.

[lil_stinkyfeet]

I had a 1st trimester loss in October as well as December.. I have been really anxious about this pregnancy. I had my 3rd blood draw today, I will get the results tomorrow.. but the wait always kills me!

[binkin]

We tried for 16 months too. I am scared when I don't feel any symptoms. I'm glad you started this thread, because I feel like I should just be enjoying this but I'm just afraid that after so long trying... it's just hard to believe this could possibly be real, so I think I'm applying that hope-buffer I got so good at while we were TTC, you know? I really feel like once I hear or see a heartbeat I will believe it a lot more.

[thomatuttle]

As I've said before, this is my 3rd pregnancy. The first ended with the loss of twins at about 10 weeks and the second ended in an ectopic rupture with the removal of my right tube in October. Every single day I freak out at the slightest little twinge! My DH can't even get very excited about it because he doesn't want his heart broken again. I can't say that I blame him! Every time I go to the bathroom I scrutinize the tp to make sure there's nothing on there. I haven't gone for any blood tests yet, because I don't want to get too crazy about it. We haven't told anyone yet either, so that makes it difficult because I don't have anyone to talk to about it. My mom recently found out she has cancer and is going to be starting chemo in the next week or so and I don't want her worrying about me while she's going through what she's going through.

[ujkcih]

I had a miscarriage in June, one in August, and one on December 1. I also had three miscarriages before my last successful pregnancy (yay!) in 2007.

I am 41 years old, and with my history and age, the odds are equal that I will miscarry as that I will not.

So I am trying to stay very okay with the idea that this pregnancy may not happen, and not get excited or think about it as a real baby. I won't tell anyone beyond very close friends and family until I start to show at 12-14 weeks. Of course, I may not make it to that point.

Basically, I try to think about being pregnant as little as possible, and just go about my day and practice gratitude for the many blessings I do have.

[Masel]

We started TTC 10 years ago. We intially tried some fertility treatments but stopped in 2002. I went years without getting a period on my own so strarting to get normal cycles 2 years ago and conceiving are such victories for me. (Victory in getting my body to a healthy place, not some fertility olympics.)

I am worried about miscarriage and I worry about my age and chromosonal abnormalities but I'm kind of surprised that I'm not obsessing about details and symptoms. Day to day functioning and caring for my DD are taking up all my energy.

[binkin]

I wish I could stop obsessing about symptoms. I kind of had a small meltdown on Sunday because I didn't feel anything. My HPTs are still super faint, which at 16dpo I was hping they'd be darker. But I'm trying just to keep my chin up and stay cool.

[Degas]

I have had three miscarriages in the past two years after a healthy pregnancy. I too am worried every time I go to the bathroom, inspecting the tp. During the last pregnancy, despite my previous miscarriages, I was able to be not worried at all. I was able to just enjoy being pregnant. Then I miscarried at 11 weeks, but I am extremely glad I was able to enjoy being pregnant, be happy, and bond during the little time I had with that baby. I very much wanted to do that this time too.

I haven't been able to - the first week I was OK, but then I started having some on and off cramps and I felt like some of my symptoms went away. I started feeling like I was going to have another miscarriage. So I went to the doctor yesterday to get my levels checked, and I don't know what the results are yet. I know what you mean about waiting - it's hard to wait to find out the results. Hopefully after I get the results I will be able to relax.
I guess one reason I'm so stressed *this* time is because I kind of feel like this may be my last chance to have a natural homebirth. I worry that I will be put in a "high-risk" category if I have another miscarriage and a midwife won't be able to attend me. Is that true, does anyone know? Can midwives not attend you after a certain amount of miscarriages? I have just assumed they couldn't. I would love to birth unassisted, but at this point my husband would totally freak on me if we did. Maybe if our midwife option goes away, we will revisit it.

[astar326]

Originally Posted by Degas

I too am worried every time I go to the bathroom, inspecting the tp.

So I went to the doctor yesterday to get my levels checked, and I don't know what the results are yet. I know what you mean about waiting - it's hard to wait to find out the results. Hopefully after I get the results I will be able to relax.

i also wipe and check for anything.
there are some mornings when i feel the need to check my temp (after 21 months ttc).

when i had bloodwork drawn last week, they said that they will give me the results at my 1st prenatal apt (which isn't until 2/25) or call if they had a concern. i'm grateful i haven't recieved a phone call, but nervous each time my phone rings as well.

[firewoman]

I had my second miscarriage (not in a row) on December 20th at 9 weeks. We conceived January 9th so I'm a little on edge that it may not be such a great thing. We weren't trying super hard, but weren't avoiding either and it happened. After my last miscarriage it took 7 months to get pregnant again so this was a surprise. I'm hoping everything is okay in there.

[Degas]

I just found out my levels:

HCG: 67,500
progesterone: 13

:::

I'm so happy and feel like I can now not worry about things and just enjoy this pregnancy. The hcg is high, but not too high, and the progesterone is well within the acceptable range of 4-50.

[ujkcih]

Well, my HCG at 12DPO was 30. Today, at 14 DPO, it was 54.6. (Progesterone looks excellent).

My doctor says that's fine on the HCG - not to worry.

But after multiple miscarriages, I know what this likely means, and I am seriously bummed :-(

[Degas]

Originally Posted by ujkcih

Well, my HCG at 12DPO was 30. Today, at 14 DPO, it was 54.6. (Progesterone looks excellent).

My doctor says that's fine on the HCG - not to worry.

But after multiple miscarriages, I know what this likely means, and I am seriously bummed :-(

I hope the best for you.

But this site, http://www.bobrow.net/kimberly/birth/hcglevels.html,
says that 54.6 is well within acceptable levels of 14 DPO. They give a range of 3-426. They give the average as 64.7 for 14 DPO - So you are exactly at the right level. I wouldn't worry.

I conceive early in my cycle, like day 8 or 9 of my cycle. So I think my numbers are a lot higher because I am almost 7 wks, not 5 wks like they think I am.

[binkin]

Well, my lines on an HPT have not gotten any darker so I am off in a minute to get a quantitative hCG beta taken. I won't hear results until tomorrow, barring some miracle of awesome hospital timing (ha ha). All finger-crossings and positive thoughts joyfully accepted.

[jillybeans]

thinking of you all. It didn't take us as long to get pg this time (3mo) but we did require help again. I have a long history of trouble conceiving and miscarriages, and those losses are still very fresh in my mind.

[Katica]

Hello All
I belong here also. I had a miscarriage back in August and it took us until now to conceive again. Scared, scared, scared...

[Catubodua]

i am worried about it all too. it took us so long to get this far. and my family has a history of multiple miscarriages which makes it even more nerve wrecking for me. i am trying to be happy, but i don't want to be happy, just in case.

[preemiemamarach]

I can't even do a formal intro- too paranoid. Had a m/c in August of 2008, also lost my 19 month old's twin at 13 weeks. The deck is stacked against me for a number of reasons (medical history, age- I turn 37 tomorrow- and DS likely has a genetic disorder). I will feel slightly better when I pass the point of my second miscarriage, even better when I get past 13 weeks when I lost DS's twin- and even *better* if I can get past 33 weeks when DS was born.

My son has a number of medical problems, and I WOH full time, so I'm hoping to be too busy to get very involved in this pregnancy for a while. I saw a MFM for the last one because of all these various issues, and they were (a) really far away, and (b) no help at all. I have an average of 12 appointments per week for DS, so I can't figure out how I could possibly do multiple appointments for myself on top of it!

[Guinevere]

Lurking and waving hi from the Sept. DDC -- I'm also pg again after a loss -- and wanted to give an extra special to Rachel, whom I know from our all-too-brief stay in our previous DDC, as well as the SN board (hey, and I just turned 37 in Nov. ). I'm so hoping we all end up with healthy, happy babies this time around!

GL to everyone; I'm only a week or so ahead of you (due 9/28).

Guin

[LibbyLou]

How's everyone doing? I've been staying away from the message boards, trying not to obesses too much. I finally got a call about my beta from Friday. My number came back at 1,637 at 20dpo. This seems like a nice, reassuring number to me. I go in for my first ultrasound on the 23rd. I'll be 7w2d, so I'm hoping to be able to see a heartbeat. I'll be able to breathe such a huge sigh of relief after that. I was supposed to go in on the 19th for my first ultrasound, but I'll be on travel for work. Stupid work! Making me wait 4 extra days!