Great now DD is "Good Jobbing" herself!

[Paeta16]

Yesterday my DD (21 months) said "Good Job Nora!" to herself after doing something. I wondered where she had heard that so I asked.....apparently it was my sister.

I know my family and early ed. workers have said that to her...good job, good girl, etc. We don't say that at home. That being said, how do I get her to not expect praise for every little thing and to do things of her own volition without the "reward" if others are constantly throwing their praises around?!

It is frustrating. I know I cannot isolate her but is there a way to manage this?

[Fuamami]

Relax! There's far worse things she could be doing. She's not going to expect if you don't do it.

Dh and I "good job" each other in a joking way quite a bit. It's all because of a neighbor we used to have who used this method of dog training. He would say to his dog, "Good sit!" or "Good cross!" or "Good poop!" (our personal favorite).

So this morning, ds2 told me "Good washing your face, Mommy!"

[Krabs]

I think it's cute, she's proud of herself.

[Shera971]

Isn't she doing exactly what you want her to do? She didn't expect praise from you, she praised herself.

I don't subscribe to the "no praise" rule myself so perhaps I've misunderstood?

[EdnaMarie]

I hate "good job" myself because it's so vague and generally very overused, but mine picked it up around that age too. I'm not against praise, I just think it should be given where due and not for, oh, eating (in a normal child). Don't worry, I just went on talking as I did and she sort of evened out. They are bound to pick up vocabulary, verbal ticks, and expectations from their peers so in that sense there's not a lot you can do except hide your cringe.

[honolula]

I know this isn't what you're looking for, but that's really cute. I think I would have dissolved into a pool of love right there on the spot.

[tinuviel_k]

Kids are going to hear "good job" over and over throughout their lives from other parents, friends, teachers, coaches... it is impossible to avoid it even if you don't say it at home.
If you don't want her to expect praise every time than don't do it and she won't expect it.

I do think that personal pride in one's achievements is a strong and healthy thing. If your daughter saying "good job" is frustrating to you perhaps you could teach her another short, catchy phrase like, "I did it!" Or "Nora worked hard!" I think it is great that she vocalized that she is happy with the job that she did.

[Paeta16]

Originally Posted by EdnaMarie

I hate "good job" myself because it's so vague and generally very overused, but mine picked it up around that age too. I'm not against praise, I just think it should be given where due and not for, oh, eating (in a normal child). Don't worry, I just went on talking as I did and she sort of evened out. They are bound to pick up vocabulary, verbal ticks, and expectations from their peers so in that sense there's not a lot you can do except hide your cringe.

This is how I feel about it too. I am not upset or anything if she is proud of herself for doing something well. It just surprised me esp. b/c it was something silly. I guess I'll just wait it out and see what happens.

[LeighB]

Originally Posted by Shera971

Isn't she doing exactly what you want her to do? She didn't expect praise from you, she praised herself.

That was my understanding to of the whole Good Job thing.

[COVegMom]

Something similar happened with my son recently, he started saying "Mommy, say 'Good job!'" Ugh. So I indulge him and then go on to describe what he did or ask questions about it or whatever I would normally do instead of giving a pat praise response. After a couple of days, he started giving me more meaningful statements about his accomplishments, like "Look Mama, I did opened it all by myself!" or "I drew purple! It's a snake Mama!"