Originally Posted by LionTigerBear
I think it is important to understand that birth IS sexual whether we want it to be, or not. Just like with intercourse-- it is sexual whether you orgasm or not-- same with birth.
It is important to understand ourselves sexually so that we can understand ourselves as birthers. Someone who has trouble orgasming during sex will have a harder time birthing. The same issues come into play. Understanding what helps you to orgasm during sex, what kind of emotional and physical environment you need, will help you to give birth easily and comfortably if not pleasurably.
This is why I WILL NOT birth with several strangers around, unless it were absolutely necessary. And I believe, this is why birthing with strangers around can feel violating to many women-- and why birth trauma is so frequently compared to rape.
Birth IS sexual.
Absolutely. Birth and sex are the most intimate things we can do as human beings. Have sex in a bright, sterile, ugly hospital room surrounded by strangers and I bet it will not be very pleasurable. Same goes for birth.
My birth wasn't exactly orgasmic, but because I put myself in a safe, loving environment in my home, complete with dim lights and music playing (we forgot to get out the candles and incense!
), I was able to just let myself go and feel completely comfortable with the sensations surging through me. Yes, they hurt like hell. But I was able to be okay with that because my psyche wasn't on the defensive in a strange, hostile environment.
I guess it all boils down to how very few women HB in this country. Most HBers would readily acknowledge that birth can be orgasmic even if they didn't have an orgasmic birth themselves. But 99% of women birth in the hospital, so it's no surprise they do not see birth as an intimate, gentle, sexual event.