How "present" can you really be? - Page 2

[Harmony08]

I only have one new baby and I feel like this at times. I don't think it has anything to do with what I am doing and everything to do with what I am thinking. Like a couple pps said. It is my mind that sabatoges my ability to be present. Even at night sometimes I will be lying there snuggly my sweet little bundle with his downy little head and my mind isn't there...I'm planning a trip to the drugstore, thinking about how well a certain recipe would freeze, wondering why I had visitors after my labor etc etc etc. I am trying to combat this tendency with everything I have because I don't want to miss a minute of him. Even when he is in the Ergo and we are lugging clothes to our apartment buildings communal laundry room....I still have the choice to be with him or to plan dinner in my head.

[mommam]

My couple's counselor just said that "in therapy terms" 30% time connected with your child is considered very successful parenting.

That helps me feel a little better, though I definitely have to remind myself to focus for at least 10 minutes at a time a couple times a day exclusively on ds and his interests of the moment. It can be surprisingly hard, but very rewarding, and I feel good about it too (in a selfish "good mama" kinda way .