DH and I had about as Pagan a wedding as you can have, on a certain level.
We were renewing our vows, being already 16 years into Common Law (which our state recognized at that time), so that in itself followed pre-Christian Celtic marriage in that they had many different forms of marriage. We were simply going from one form to another.
We used the Quaker form of the state license, which meant that we had no officiant besides ourselves. We did have to have witnesses to sign the license. You should see our part of the license, names all over the thing!
The timing was the Full Moon right around Samhain of that year. The idea being that Samhain celebration, in the midst of the final preparations for winter, was the last chance with everyone together to contract a marriage before winter closed in and kept extended families and communities apart. Granted not as much of an issue in modern times, or is it?
We said our vows to each other, mostly consisting of stating to the effect that we'd made vows 16 years previously and would continue to learn and grow and keep them.
No need to spell out the exact vows, which aren't quite Biblical standard, at that point.
At some point, I explained why we chose the timing, etc. We shared cake and ice wine, pointing out the symbolism. Then Mom spoke, and she spoke from her Catholic perspective in a positive way, and it was very okay.
Then we ate cake and drank ice wine.
I don't understand the idea that just because the ceremony is from another tradition that someone cannot go. You're not being asked to convert, or even to practice that faith for so much as a minute. You're only there to share the couple's joy at getting married. I've been to Catholic, Protestant (I think it was a Methodist church), and mixed weddings for my family. I would have no more expected them to not follow their own beliefs than they expected me to not follow mine.
|The thing that gets me about this whole discussion is that many Christian people would NEVER worry about offending others with their ceremony, it is just expected that it is the norm and the basis off which we all plan ours. I've sat through MANY christian marriages and have not felt threatened by it. I would hope that others would be able to enjoy ours without feeling threatened as well. Our ceremony was seen by most people as non-religious, as it seems in many peoples' minds, it's in a church or it's not religious at all.
That any wedding that's non-Christian (unless Jewish, Islam, or Hindu) is seen as being somehow automatically non-religious at all is rather a rude double standard IMO.
Religion and Christian are not synonymous.