Grrrr! My plans are going kablooie!

[amydidit]

Argh! I'm so pissed right now. Many many months ago my IL's agreed that when I go into labor they will pick up my DD's and watch them until the baby is born. They live only 2 miles from us, so that was perfect. I do not want DD1 at the birth (long story) and I will need DH's full attention so having DD2 (3.5 yrs old) there would be too distracting. Plus she doesn't handle screaming well, and I'm a major screamer in labor.

Well today my IL's told us that they might be going out of town for a few days, sometime soon. They aren't sure. Maybe. At the least they are planning on going to Denver a couple days next week. Denver is about 3 hours away. Gonna make it a bit hard for them to pick the kids up right away. : (Especially since they probably aren't taking their car but will be riding with a couple friends of theirs.)

They KNOW I'm due soon. They KNOW how I've been feeling. They KNOW (because we've told them) that my labors tend to get intense fast and so we need the kids gone ASAP. And now... we're very likely not going to have anyone to watch them.

:::

Now I just want to cry. I just feel like I can't do this anymore. :

[hedgewitch]

Just upfront ask them "Does that mean you won't be able to look after the girls during my labour? Obviously this will be a massive issue for us so I really need to know."

If they agreed to take on this important job then they need to be fully committed. Don't be afraid to make them stick to their promise, they can take a trip after the baby is born. The birth of a child is much more important!

[amydidit]

DH is going to try and talk to them tonight. It's not a good idea for me to talk to them. We've had some *issues* in the past because I won't put up with crap. But DH isn't holding his breath. They will probably say SURE no problem... and then just do their thing anyway. They've gotten really bad about that in the last month or so. They think of no one but themselves. And I'm SO sick of it. Unfortunately we really have no other options here. I have one casual friend here in town who MIGHT agree to watch the kids. But DD2 would be so traumatized. She does not like to be without us, but especially when she's around someone she doesn't know well. Other than that DH has a couple sisters here. Neither of which are responsible. One would surely agree to pick up the girls, but then just leave them with her kids while she went out again. And her kids are way too rough and I don't trust them to babysit a pumpkin, much less my DD2. DD1 is old enough, she can fend for herself.

Argh! I'm going to go take a nap. This is stressing me out way to much.

[ilovebabies]

How rude!
Really, I don't even know what to say. Is there anyone else at all who could take your kids for you? It would be great if you could find an alternative and then just tell your IL's that you will not be needing their help. :

Oops, just read your above post that you really have no other options.
Man... what is the deal with your IL's? I'm really sorry mamma. Let us know what happens after your dh talks to them. He needs to just tell them how inconsiderate and unreliable they are being. Crazy.

[fuzzypeach]

Ugh. Hope they come to their senses... or that you are able to make other acceptable arrangements!

[texanatheart]

So sorry you're havng to deal with this. I hope your dh is able to talk some sense into them.

[amydidit]

Thanks guys. I'm still really upset over all this. DH thinks I'm being silly and should've seen it coming. Well, maybe I should have. Doesn't mean it's not still upsetting though. KWIM?

I'm really hoping that he can talk some sense into them tonight.

[elisent]

Originally Posted by amydidit

DH is going to try and talk to them tonight. It's not a good idea for me to talk to them. We've had some *issues* in the past because I won't put up with crap. But DH isn't holding his breath. They will probably say SURE no problem... and then just do their thing anyway. They've gotten really bad about that in the last month or so. They think of no one but themselves. And I'm SO sick of it. Unfortunately we really have no other options here. I have one casual friend here in town who MIGHT agree to watch the kids. But DD2 would be so traumatized. She does not like to be without us, but especially when she's around someone she doesn't know well. Other than that DH has a couple sisters here. Neither of which are responsible. One would surely agree to pick up the girls, but then just leave them with her kids while she went out again. And her kids are way too rough and I don't trust them to babysit a pumpkin, much less my DD2. DD1 is old enough, she can fend for herself.

Argh! I'm going to go take a nap. This is stressing me out way to much.

Maybe you could talk to your friend and ask for her to be a backup option. If she agrees you could make a point of going over to her house a few times with the girls so DD2 can get to know her better. Maybe even have her babysit for an hour or two with you nearby.

[*~Danielle~*]

Originally Posted by elisent

Maybe you could talk to your friend and ask for her to be a backup option. If she agrees you could make a point of going over to her house a few times with the girls so DD2 can get to know her better. Maybe even have her babysit for an hour or two with you nearby.

I think this is a great idea. That way you won't be as stressed as if you had absolutely no one. Hugs. I hope it all works out.

[amydidit]

Well DH talked to them last night and they *say* they are still planning on watching the girls. They would just come back from wherever they are. ~sighs~ Being 2 miles away is one thing. Being hours away is quite another.

As for the friend I have locally... she's more of an online friend. In the 4 years we've known each other online we've gotten together maybe a handful of times max. And none in over a year. We still chat online on LJ, but getting together is difficult. Heck, I don't even know where in town she lives anymore. Still... we can try. Hopefully there will be enough time between now and the birth that DD2 can meet her again at least once.