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steaming mad right now! please help!

post #1 of 13
Thread Starter 
A mother from a playgroup that I go to is telling lies about me and things I said and I would really like to give her some info. I'll look this stuff up for myself too but if anyone has links or good info that could support my position that'd be great. So she sent a message to a friend about circ and these are some of the finer points:

1) She doesn't believe that foreskin is sold.

2) Her ds's circ didn't hurt much because they used numbing cream (am I remembering correctly reading about the AAP and the Canadian Ped Society saying numbing cream is not enough? Not to mention all the side effects, which I will inform her about).

3) No exposure to pee and poop because of the plastibell (also, isn't plastibell the most painful method?).

4) She circed because she knew someone who had to be circed at the age of three because they dropped a toilet seat on themselves....could that even be a legit reason for a circ?

5) She doesn't beleive that circs are done later in life because of doctor's ignorance and the fact that people pull the foreskin back when they shouldn't. she says the nurses told her not to pull back so obviously everyone knows now not to do that. are there any stats comparing circing for medical reasons later in life among other countries?

I guess that's about it, besides a bunch of other bs that i'll respond to. I'd really like to clear up her misinformation about all this because she will be having more kids and I hate that she is spreading it around. Thanks is advance if you can help at all. She keeps going on and on about how much better it is to have it done as an infant when they're numb and have no idea what's going on
post #2 of 13
Sounds like my mom and dad. Since they have never heard of an intact person who was content with their foreskin (I'm assuming they just didn't know how to care for intact penises), they think DS will hate me for not circ'ing him. Ignore ignorance.

Oh, I'm loving my NP playgroup right about now!!
post #3 of 13
We've actually been warned (by a ped) about heavy toilet seats slamming shut. Think heavy porcelain or wood seats. They sell seats that have some sort of damper or self-closing mechanism that is slow, kinda like drawer and cabinet door dampers (or is it dampener?).

This is wikipedia, so take it with a grain of salt, but googling "toilet penile injury" comes up with quite a few hits.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet-related_injury
post #4 of 13
My Brother was circed at 6 because he wasn't retracting. Mom says that it was because of the damage done when he squished himself with the toilet seat at age 2. It didn't heal right and created skin bridges. If the doc had been informed he would have left him alone until he was older. Then the skin bridges could have been cut and he would still have a foreskin. He wasn't having infections or any other problems, it was because he wasn't retracting. He may not have had skin bridges since some boys don't retract that young. This was years ago and I am just speculating on what I could gather from my Mom. My mom wasn't informed on the subject and just took the docs word.
post #5 of 13
So, she sent this "info" to a mutual friend and the friend told you - and now you'd like to send accurate info to the friend? Seems like if the friend forwarded you the email (this whole thing sounds complicated) then she is at least open to hearing your pov.
post #6 of 13
Is she in Ontario too?
post #7 of 13
Well, I don't see how having a foreskin would make any difference when it came to toilet seats slamming down. If anything it would add protection to the glans. *shrug*
post #8 of 13
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by MyBoysBlue View Post
My Brother was circed at 6 because he wasn't retracting. Mom says that it was because of the damage done when he squished himself with the toilet seat at age 2. It didn't heal right and created skin bridges. If the doc had been informed he would have left him alone until he was older. Then the skin bridges could have been cut and he would still have a foreskin. He wasn't having infections or any other problems, it was because he wasn't retracting. He may not have had skin bridges since some boys don't retract that young. This was years ago and I am just speculating on what I could gather from my Mom. My mom wasn't informed on the subject and just took the docs word.
My Dad "had" to be circed when he was 8 because he wasn't retracting It's so riduculous but at least he isn't silly enough to think everyone should have it done just in case. Ugh.

Quote:
Originally Posted by zinemama View Post
So, she sent this "info" to a mutual friend and the friend told you - and now you'd like to send accurate info to the friend? Seems like if the friend forwarded you the email (this whole thing sounds complicated) then she is at least open to hearing your pov.

Sorry if I wasn't clear. lol I was really angry at the time. So S put an anti-circ message on her facebook and J didn't like it. So J sent S a message and S passed it on to me to make sure J gets the correct info. lol And I acutally think J is open ti hearing my point of view. I was just really angry when she said that I told her that the reason men have to be circed later in life is because they're parents didn't keep them clean as a child: As if I would ever say that!
Quote:
Originally Posted by the_lissa View Post
Is she in Ontario too?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claire and Boys View Post
Well, I don't see how having a foreskin would make any difference when it came to toilet seats slamming down. If anything it would add protection to the glans. *shrug*
I actually wrote that to her. I compared the whole thing to a girl falling onto the crossbar of her bike and her labia getting sore and swollen but I obviously wouldn't cut off all my daughter's parts. And then I asked her what if that little boy didn't have foreskin and it was the glans that was sore and swollen? Would they cut off the head of the penis or is it just the foreskin that we can get rid of like that?
post #9 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by JamieB View Post
4) She circed because she knew someone who had to be circed at the age of three because they dropped a toilet seat on themselves....could that even be a legit reason for a circ?
Though unlikely, it would be possible for a foreskin (or any body part) to be damaged beyond repair to the point of needing amputation. I'll bet all of us can think of someone who lost some body part. Just off the top of my head I know a man who lost a leg in Vietnam, a woman who lost an ear in a car accident and at least 5 people who have lost parts of fingers in various accidents. That doesn't include people I know who were amputees for unknown (to me) reasons or due to illness. So, since finger amputation due to accidents seems to be very common, it would have made more sense to cut off those at birth.

The other major flaw in this arguement is: if he had already been circ'd, then wouldn't he have lost the glans of his penis in this supposed terrible accident?

Heck, If I was really that scared of toilet seat accidents, then I'd probably just make DS sit while using the toilet, or teach him really good aim so he can miss the seat while it's down.
post #10 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by JamieB View Post
1) She doesn't believe that foreskin is sold.
http://www.plasmetic.com/skin/skin-c...h-winfrey.html
post #11 of 13
Thread Starter 
Well I sent her a message addressing all those points and while I still don't think she actually "gets it" she says she never wants to have another boy because she wouldn't want to have to put them through that again. I guess it's better than nothing.
post #12 of 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by eepster View Post
Heck, If I was really that scared of toilet seat accidents, then I'd probably just make DS sit while using the toilet, or teach him really good aim so he can miss the seat while it's down.
Or let him keep using his potty chair until he's tall enough that a slamming toilet seat or lid will miss his penis entirely.

Or better yet, get him a small platform beside the toilet to stand on so that everything is outside the arc of a slamming toilet seat/lid. At the thrift store I see the adjustable plastic platforms that are used in step classes all the time, and I suspect one of these would serve admirably in the aforementioned capacity.
post #13 of 13
1) She doesn't believe that foreskin is sold.

Well you got the link above...

2) Her ds's circ didn't hurt much because they used numbing cream (am I remembering correctly reading about the AAP and the Canadian Ped Society saying numbing cream is not enough? Not to mention all the side effects, which I will inform her about).

"But the researchers found that while topical anesthetics may help initially, they are woefully inadequate during foreskin separation and incision."
http://www.cnn.com/HEALTH/9712/23/ci...tic/index.html


3) No exposure to pee and poop because of the plastibell (also, isn't plastibell the most painful method?).

YES, ALL methods are painful equally but the pain with the plastibell is LONGER http://www.nature.com/jp/journal/v22.../7210653a.html

4) She circed because she knew someone who had to be circed at the age of three because they dropped a toilet seat on themselves....could that even be a legit reason for a circ?

creating more trauma, AFTER a trauma? NON-SENSE!

5) She doesn't beleive that circs are done later in life because of doctor's ignorance and the fact that people pull the foreskin back when they shouldn't. she says the nurses told her not to pull back so obviously everyone knows now not to do that. are there any stats comparing circing for medical reasons later in life among other countries?

Really?!?!? since I don't want to violate the UA guidelines in this forum, you can even find videos in youtube regarding adult circ. Also check here http://www.aafp.org and do a search on Adult circ. It carries the same risks infant circ carries, from bleeding, hematoma formation, infection, inadvertent damage to the glans, removal of too much or too little skin, aesthetically unpleasing results to change of sensation during intercourse.

I guess that's about it, besides a bunch of other bs that i'll respond to. I'd really like to clear up her misinformation about all this because she will be having more kids and I hate that she is spreading it around. Thanks is advance if you can help at all. She keeps going on and on about how much better it is to have it done as an infant when they're numb and have no idea what's going on[/QUOTE]

ETA: To add in #3, there will be a PERMANENT exposure to pee and poo through the meatus, since the foreskin is no longer protecting the penis from pee and poo, making him prone to infections http://www.circumstitions.com/Utis.html#cause
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Mothering › Forums › Health › The Case Against Circumcision › steaming mad right now! please help!