Buddhist Mamma Sangha - March- June Second Quarter '09

[Kothi]

Hellloooooo out there... hoping everyone's found time to sit... a lotus to you.

[kangamitroo]

hello! my formal sitting is not every day lately. i have had a lot of spontaneous maitri practice happening, as well as tonglen. on the spot mindfulness practice.

however, last night i had this lovely experience of re-realizing the importance of constant, ongoing right effort. my sense of commitment or discipline is finally maturing.

peace be with you.

[kangamitroo]

hoping some of the other mamas we have heard from now and again will return...one mama had a thread going about mindfulness...and it sems like there is a need for more active sangha going around.

looking for library book ideas, i was browsing on Parallax Press. i found this children's book Meow Said the Mouse by Beatrice Barbey and Philippe Ames. i thought it was a lovely and fun story about interbeing.

starting and ending my day with bodhisattva vows again. don't know how i fell out of this habit. i find it very helpful.

may you be free of the root of suffering.

[Kothi]

Yes, I hope everyone rejoins us too... It IS so difficult to be mindful, find connection on the computer, AND do the six million mom things you do.... But I enjoy checking in here for other moms in that effort for balance day to day...

[kangamitroo]

dd and i found a beautiful version of Stone Soup, retold and illustrated by Jon Muth (who wrote Zen Shorts). i definitely recommend it.

tonight by accident i found a great page with lots of links related to "family-oriented sangha and mindful parenting":

http://www.changesurfer.com/Sangha/index.html

i am off to sit--away from the computer--before i fall asleep.

may all beings everywhere be free of suffering and the root of suffering.

[Theoretica]

So does anyone here work with their kiddos on meditating and finding quiet? I'd love to hear how others incorporate mindfulness into a dialogue with The Smaller People At Home

[kangamitroo]

Originally Posted by Theoretica

So does anyone here work with their kiddos on meditating and finding quiet? I'd love to hear how others incorporate mindfulness into a dialogue with The Smaller People At Home

my 5yo is having a hard week with a lot of frustration and explosions. after she calms down, and i am holding her, i have gently talked with her, asking whether exploding had helped her at all. we then talk about what we can do differently.

whenever i lose my temper i also try to talk her through my experience. "i got angry and yelled, but it did not help. instead, i could have taken a breathing break and realized there is nothing to get upset about after all."

our biggest mindfulness practice is on our walks, where we observe nature and the interdependence of creation.

i am also trying to get a silent blessing before we eat to be a regular habit. in the past we would thank the sun, soil, farmers, etc before eating.

[Keeta]

Hey mamas, I've been away for a while but just found this thread again.

I had a really nice afternoon with DS after kind of a challenging day - we got out of the house and to a nature preserve. Even though the quiet only lasted a few moments, I was really able to stop and breathe and enjoy watching him working so hard playing. It was very grounding and reminded me that I really should get us outside more - it resets something inside me to be surrounded by the green, the birds chirping, the water trickling by....

I've been working on befriending my anger - and illustrating how to deal with it for DS's benefit - kind of narrating my inner dialogue so he can understand what I'm feeling. I always take deep breaths to try to calm myself down, and I want him to know why (so I've been saying, "I'm feeling very angry right now. I'm going to take some deep breaths to see if it helps. Ok, I feel a little better, I'm going to do it a few more times and see if it helps. Ok, I feel a bit better now."). Hopefully he can use the technique eventually, too.

[Kothi]

Originally Posted by Theoretica

So does anyone here work with their kiddos on meditating and finding quiet? I'd love to hear how others incorporate mindfulness into a dialogue with The Smaller People At Home

I'm trying to incorporate yoga as a way of finding breath/calm... it's not going magically well or anything, but my 3yrold has at least the concept of practice and calming.... I've been doing a class with his preschool but we actually haven't let him in it yet b/c he acts up with ME doing it... the teacher takes him out and tries to distract him so the other kids can do it... I'm not a yoga instructor- I just volunteer at the school- I vaguely remember you are a certified instructor, Zoebird?

[Kothi]

kid books! kid books!

Thank you kangamitroo, will surf...

Some book lists I found on for children:

http://www.amazon.com/Buddhist-Child...m/LVO6G77NSS4A

http://www.amazon.com/Books-teaching...lm_f_1_rlrsrs0

and from the archives in Finding Your Tribe:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...372471&page=45

[avaylee]

Subbing after a long absence from the thread!

Keeta, thank you for sharing how you incorporate mindfulness and your emotions into your life with your child. I definitely find that as my toddler stretches my patience, I go off into a corner to breathe and calm myself down. I can see where it might be more helpful for both of us (in the long term) if she gets to see and passively participate in that process. It may serve her very well in the not so distant future.

Glad to have found everyone again!

[kangamitroo]

kothi, thanks for posting the kids book lists.

a little bit of Shantideva for inspiration:
"Raining down the flood of food and drink,
May I dispel the ills of thirst and famine.
And in the aeons marked by scarcity and want,
May I myself appear as drink and sustenance."
from The Way of the Bodhisattva

thanks to everyone for sharing about your daily challenges and how you are practicing with your children (and how your children inspire you to take refuge!)

[harmonyhobbit]

Hello ladies. I have completely fallen away from my formal practice. I am still not well educated beyond the basic tenets. I woudl like to study, but I find that everything I try to read is way over my head. Can anyone recommend something very simple that I can read?

[kangamitroo]

Originally Posted by harmonyhobbit

Hello ladies. I have completely fallen away from my formal practice. I am still not well educated beyond the basic tenets. I woudl like to study, but I find that everything I try to read is way over my head. Can anyone recommend something very simple that I can read?

i'm glad you found us here. a favorite book is The Heart of the Buddha's Teaching by Thich Nhat Hanh.

last week i was visiting family. very hard to get time before bed, when i would typically sit. my practice was much more about being mindful during chores, during walks etc.

[kangamitroo]

i have fallen into a bad habit of cramming my mind full of reading--gobbling up fiction at bedtime, blogs when i'm "working" on the computer", magazines when i'm in the checkout line...

when i'm outside and look at the sky i remember the importance of keeping a sense of spaciousness in my mind. but when i see the printed word, i am gobbling it, filling space.

it is edginess from work avoidance, i think...

i was prompted to post when i read today's daily dharma from tricycle.com: "Knowledge and theories about wisdom are like carrying books on the back of a donkey. We may carry around many ideas of worthwhile changes that we would like to make in our life. To evolve, we must put those ideas into practice or they will become a weight for us." –Christopher Titmuss, from An Awakened Life

peace be with you all.

[Kothi]

I liked that one too! Too too much running around going on in my head, too little still water.

[Theoretica]

Originally Posted by Kothi

Thank you kangamitroo, will surf...

Some book lists I found on for children:

http://www.amazon.com/Buddhist-Child...m/LVO6G77NSS4A

http://www.amazon.com/Books-teaching...lm_f_1_rlrsrs0

and from the archives in Finding Your Tribe:
http://www.mothering.com/discussions...372471&page=45

Thank you so much!

I find myself doing the same thing as the PP, cramming my brain instead of allowing the quiet. It's hard.

[kangamitroo]

this abbreviated version of Buddha's advice keeps floating through my mind:
"Abandon what is unskillful....Cultivate the good."

i know it is from Anguttara Nikaya (part of the Sutta Pitaka), but i won't be tracking it down there. not this week anyhow. trying to keep it simple.

maybe it is time, instead, to re-read Zen Mind Beginner's Mind?

peace to you all.

[yoginisarah]

I'm so glad to find this thread! I need to make time to sit again. And to remain present with my kiddos. I don't have much time to write right now but I will come back and visit!

[rootzdawta]

Nice to have found this thread.

I was introduced to chanting nam-myoho-renge-kyo a few years ago. Only recently have I developed a more consistent practice. I received my gohonzon about 2 months ago and have been doing gongyo and daimoku most mornings and evenings. I find evening gongyo to be extremely challenging. My boys are both awake and they really make it difficult to focus. Not to mention that I'm usually bone tired by 7 (which is when I usually chant). In any case, I still feel very new to the practice. It doesn't quite feel like mine yet. But I have seen some positive things happen in my life since I've become consistent. Yet I still feel like unwavering peace is missing. I've been reading the teaching of Nichiren but, I don't know, I often think maybe I should be reading the teaching of Buddha directly.