Ultrasound tomorrow!I'm excited and a little nervous. I will feel so happy if I really do see a little tadpole with a beating heart.
I'm trying to feel my way through the pre-natal testing conundrum. I've never had anything but the 20 week sonogram. With my first child, that proved to be very alarming--his umbilical cord contained only one artery (as opposed to 2) and abnormalities with a kidney and heart. After a long, awful weekend we had fetal echocardiogram that indicated the heart was healthy and normal. We opted not to do an amnio--I'm pro-choice but didn't want to make one about my own baby--and all turned out well.
I'm now almost 10 years older and have 4 children--all healthy--who are all joys and handfuls. I know it would be terribly difficult to have an unhealthy or physically/mentally challenged child--for me, and for them.
My DH has unmitigated faith in our ability to deal with whatever life throws us, and to grow from it. He's against any testing but always willing to support my choices.
I've got to love him for that.
I don't think I'd ever terminate. I don't want to do the tests, like the quad test, that indicate risk but don't establish genetic anomolies. A false positive would make me insane. The amnio is done so late the choice would be unbearable. I don't know what I will end up doing.
I did think some of you might understand--the risks here are real--and anyway I think I need to write about this a little.
Thank you for being here.