WWYD? 5 yo is "truant"

[yippityskippity]

(x-post to Learning at Home)

For various reasons that aren't relevant to this thread, my DH and I are allowing our 5 yo DD to complete kindergarten at the PS and then will homeschool her and younger DD next year.

DD is doing extremely well academically. She is not struggling with her schoolwork nor is she behind in any way. In fact, in some areas she's painfully ahead (she's been able to fill in the "Counting to 100" grid with ease since December, but her teacher still makes her do it every.stinking.day).

Last September, we went on a family vacation that resulted in DD missing 2 days of school while we went to the Monterey Bay Aquarium. Awesome, fun, educational trip. (FWIW, DH has NO say as to when his vacation is. He's assigned his days from the powers that be.)

Last Wednesday, we took her to the Exploratorium in SF (free admission day ). The kids had a wonderful time, learned a lot. I'm so glad we took them.

However, as a result of our 2 excursions and me being honest with the school about where we were instead of lying and saying DD was sick, my DD has officially been labeled a "truant" by the school. 3 unexcused absences or tardies = truancy.

We received a patronizing form letter from the school and have been instructed to arrange a meeting with the principal to discuss this issue face bad consequences ("Failure to discuss this problem and/or continued absences may result in a referral to the Attendance Review Board, the District Attorney, the Probation Department and/or the Human Services Agency [CPS] for action.")

BUT... they quoted California Education Code Section 48260. I found this:

"EC Section 48260 (a): Any pupil subject to compulsory full-time education or compulsory continuation education who is absent from school without a valid excuse three full days or tardy or absent more than any 30-minute period during the school day without a valid excuse on three occasions in one school year, or any combination thereof, is a truant and shall be reported to the attendance supervisor or the superintendent of the school district."

DD is only 5. Attendance isn't compulsory until she's 6 (next Sept.). So, I don't see how this law applies to her. Is there something I'm missing? DH and I are going to argue our case to the principal as soon as we can set up a meeting, because remember, there will be dire consequences if we don't go.

Hey, I just realized something. I'm 37 years old and a college graduate and I just got a "referral" to the principal's office.

I swear, I'm so over them thinking that they know better than I do what's appropriate for my DD.

[Linda on the move]

Most schools have policies for getting absences approved ahead of time if it is something that the parent knows about -- such as a family trip, visiting a grandparent, etc.

Your reasons are "valid." Around here, winter vacations are fairly common. Parents tell the teacher and get the work ahead of time.

I'd go to the meeting and tell them they need a policy for parents to be honest and provide their children with enrichment or the chance to visit relatives, or the parents will just all lie (which is what you would do next after this nonsense). I personally think it's bad for children to see their parent lieing to the school -- it's confusing to children.

[fadedgirl]

This is p-s-y-c-h-o.

I would not let my child attend another day. No way would I allow them to collect another penny of federal or state $$$ on behalf of my daughter being enrolled there. Granted, this is not necessarily what my advice to you or another would be...but it is most certainly what *I* would do.

And I'm sure someone is going to say that the school has no choice, that they are required to send these letters and categorize the absences as such. If that is true...whatever! It is still PSYCHO. Tell me I can't take my kid out of school more than 2 days per year, or on a family vacation, without being threatened with legal action and the almighty wrath of CPS? Seriously, this scares the jinxes out of me. I'd be outta there yesterday.

I'm incredibly curious now. How many other folks have experienced this in California? For real, you can't take your kids on a family vacation in California during the school year without being threatened by this BS? I guess I've been living under a rock, as I am completely astonished by this. I sure hope this school is the extreme exception and not the rule.

[alegna]

Originally Posted by Linda on the move

Most schools have policies for getting absences approved ahead of time if it is something that the parent knows about -- such as a family trip, visiting a grandparent, etc.

That is absolutely NOT the case here. They are very clear that vacations on school time are NOT okay. NOT excused. Period. Paragraph. End.of.sentence.

-Angela

[SunshineJ]

I would not waste my time by scheduling a meeting with the principal. I would take a copy of the letter, a copy of the truancy statute and a copy of CA education code 48200 where it specifies that "Each person between the ages of 6 and 18 years not exempted under the provisions of this chapter or Chapter 3 (commencing with Section 48400) is subject to compulsory full-time education. " I would highlight the applicable sections and mail them back to the principal stating that as your DD is not included under the state law in the catagory of "compulsary attendance", this does not currently apply. Then, because people like this rub me the wrong way, I'd be sure to schedule a fun day off for her in the next few weeks and let them know why she'll be out of school that day!

K.

[MattBronsil]

Dear Principal:

According to my decisions to send children to school, I feel it is necessary that letters written to me involve a non-truant brain. This is the first unexcused letter you wrote. After 3 letters, you will be required to schedule a meeting at my place of business to discuss the issue or you will be referred to those that gave you your degree in education for a review.

[CarrieMF]

the school is most likely following protocol that they may or may not agree with.

It is going to show up on her records that she was missing for 3 days. which means the school board and the Attendance Review Board are going to have records that she was missing those 3 days.

If policy says the meeting is the next step then go to the meeting & chances are high that they'll note why she was gone, it has only happened 3 times & it won't be brought up again. IF the teacher let the principal know why she was gone, they still have to go through the steps.

[kofduke]

In PA, while attendance is not compulsory until age 8, once a child is enrolled in school they are subject to truancy regulations.

[oceanwinds]

Originally Posted by alegna

That is absolutely NOT the case here. They are very clear that vacations on school time are NOT okay. NOT excused. Period. Paragraph. End.of.sentence.

-Angela

Actually, it might be.

We have lived in CA for two years and my son has been in a PS here both years (K and 1st.) Each year he has missed two weeks of school for family vacations to Florida. CA has a program called (I think this is the right term) Independent Study. We sign the papers before we leave and the teacher leaves a pack of worksheets (really just busywork, not anything important) for DS to do before we get back. The days do not count as absences and the school still gets their money (which is really all that matters, right? )

[yippityskippity]

Thanks so much for all the replies. Here's one tiny problem... we have a couple more "unexcused" absences planned: 1 to attend the orientation at the charter we're HSing her through next year... and there's a Celtic fair coming up. Not to mention that it would be nice to hit the Aquarium again before school lets out and it gets all crazy and busy. OK, granted the fair and aquarium can wait. ::sigh:: I feel like a little kid counting down the days until school lets out.

I know it's literally their playground and their rules. It's just hard. Honestly, it galls me to have to ask permission from a stranger to make parenting decisions. Feh.

BTW, yes she's still writing her stupid numbers. A week or two ago, she was complaining LOUD about that and begging me to e-mail her teacher and ask for something more challenging to do. I encouraged her to speak up and ask for something else to do. I just asked her about it again and she seemed subdued and said that she wants to write them and that I shouldn't email Miss R. Hmmm... not sure what's up with that. She said that she didn't want to ask Miss R. for more challenging work because "She'll get mad and I just need to do my work."

Sorry for the rant. We're keeping her in because we think it will make for an easier transition. The more I think about this, the more I wonder if that's the case. But, she does seem to like going most of the time. So, maybe I'm making too big a deal out of this. Just 90-something days left.....

[alegna]

Nope. I've worked in the schools here. No such program here.

-Angela

[moondiapers]

Originally Posted by yippityskippity

Thanks so much for all the replies. Here's one tiny problem... we have a couple more "unexcused" absences planned: 1 to attend the orientation at the charter we're HSing her through next year... and there's a Celtic fair coming up. Not to mention that it would be nice to hit the Aquarium again before school lets out and it gets all crazy and busy. OK, granted the fair and aquarium can wait. ::sigh:: I feel like a little kid counting down the days until school lets out......

Then you need to sign her up for independant study for thos days well in advance. Then she won't be truant. This is how it's done in CA schools. Then you get your days off, and they get their money.

[yippityskippity]

Originally Posted by oceanwinds

Actually, it might be.

We have lived in CA for two years and my son has been in a PS here both years (K and 1st.) Each year he has missed two weeks of school for family vacations to Florida. CA has a program called (I think this is the right term) Independent Study. We sign the papers before we leave and the teacher leaves a pack of worksheets (really just busywork, not anything important) for DS to do before we get back. The days do not count as absences and the school still gets their money (which is really all that matters, right? )

Hmm... do you think they would do Independent Study for just a day or two? Or I could just pull her out for a week and do the aquarium, fair and orientation all in one week. Very interesting. I think I'll ask the office today.

[moondiapers]

Originally Posted by alegna

Nope. I've worked in the schools here. No such program here.

-Angela

your locations shows Houston though, is that still correct? We're talking abougt California schools.

[tbone]

Yes, most schools (although maybe not all) will allow for absences if they are planned in advance and it can be called something 'educational'. My sister just left for a 3 week trip abroad, she explained all the 'educational' sites and learning opportunities. And she did have to sign something too I think.

Same for when we were young and in school, my mom had to talk to the school etc etc, and our absences were excused.

My kids are in private montessori right now, so I don't really have to jump through hoops for us to have a day off, but I've often thought about what I will if they go to public school. I say if because right now I've decided to homeschool them after Montessori.

Hope everything works out!

[oceanwinds]

Originally Posted by yippityskippity

Hmm... do you think they would do Independent Study for just a day or two? Or I could just pull her out for a week and do the aquarium, fair and orientation all in one week. Very interesting. I think I'll ask the office today.

I would do the whole week. I'm not sure if they do individual days. We've always done two weeks at a time.

Originally Posted by alegna

Nope. I've worked in the schools here. No such program here.

-Angela

By "here," do you mean TX or CA?

I'm pretty sure this is a state-wide program in CA. I live in northern CA, but I have friends in San Diego that use this program, too.

[karina5]

I know that my Brother and SIL were able to get their kids excused for a trip to see family in Thailand and the school worked with them very nicely.

I am of the mindset that rules are made to be bent when there is a good reason and so it surely doesn't hurt to have conversations w/ the school and see if they will work with you.

[alegna]

I"m talking here in TX- if CA has a program- great!

Though I would think it's unlikely to fly for a day here and there- but hey, worth a try!

-Angela

[Delicateflower]

I know this is dishonest, and I wouldn't tell your daughter you did it, but why not just call the school on those mornings and tell them she's unwell and won't be in that day.

Does her teacher know you've been doing it in good faith? Maybe find a way to let her know you were doing 'educational' things, explaining about fish and aquatic life, food cycles. Maybe ask her if they'll be doing a unit on that topic so you can work in what she sees at the aquarium? Then she'll be more likely to overlook your daughter coming back after being home sick talking about fish.

Here you can a week's worth of unexplained absences. But that doesn't help the OP in her state.

[tbone_kneegrabber]

I would go into the principals office, explain where you were, mostly likely they will look at your kid's school work and realize it doesn't matter if she's there or not that she's doing fine etc, and then ask about the policy to do "educational" field trips and such. We did that all the time when I was in school. Also, just write her a sick note if you don't want to ask for "permission"