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Anyone else have BPD?

post #1 of 110
Thread Starter 


I have BPD but I have hardly any symptoms anymore at least they are more in control. Anyone else like me? But afraid that now that you are a Mom that they may come out full force again? I have had them in control for many years now around 6-7. Anyone else?
post #2 of 110
Thread Starter 
Really I am all alone here:
post #3 of 110
Hi there! I have BPD, also! I went through a pretty intense year of therapy and have most of my symptoms under control (at least I understand myself now!!!) I've also recently become a mother and am completely in love with my little boy : If anything, having him helps me with my condition! He helps me keep my priorities in check, and I can love him endlessly without worrying about emotional stress! If you want to email me, my addy is eimichan@gmail.com We can talk more, compare symptoms, maybe relate a little!

Cheers!
post #4 of 110
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Eimichan View Post
Hi there! I have BPD, also! I went through a pretty intense year of therapy and have most of my symptoms under control (at least I understand myself now!!!) I've also recently become a mother and am completely in love with my little boy : If anything, having him helps me with my condition! He helps me keep my priorities in check, and I can love him endlessly without worrying about emotional stress! If you want to email me, my addy is eimichan@gmail.com We can talk more, compare symptoms, maybe relate a little!

Cheers!

I will I have also had INTENSE therapy. I forget the name of it but it the kind you can not do alone, and the theripist has to be trained in it. I also have a little boy but he is 4 now I have Gmail also I will PM you my addy I have a crazy X who like to cyber stalk
post #5 of 110
Hello ladies I as well have BPD. I was diagnosed back in Nov. and am going through therapy. Would love to chat more about this with you and learn about your journies as you went through therapy. Peace~N~Love
post #6 of 110

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post #7 of 110

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post #8 of 110
Quote:
Originally Posted by SunShineSally View Post

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eimichan View Post
Hi there! I have BPD, also! I went through a pretty intense year of therapy and have most of my symptoms under control (at least I understand myself now!!!) I've also recently become a mother and am completely in love with my little boy : If anything, having him helps me with my condition! He helps me keep my priorities in check, and I can love him endlessly without worrying about emotional stress! If you want to email me, my addy is eimichan@gmail.com We can talk more, compare symptoms, maybe relate a little!

Cheers!

I will I have also had INTENSE therapy. I forget the name of it but it the kind you can not do alone, and the theripist has to be trained in it. I also have a little boy but he is 4 now I have Gmail also I will PM you my addy I have a crazy X who like to cyber stalk



I think you are talking about EMDR therapy. It's alot more helpful in war veterans or someone who has suffered a very great trauma. It didn't work for me as well as normal hypnotherapy.

 

post #9 of 110

I'm here also! I've found that the older I get, the less symptoms I have (I went from meeting all of the criteria to only 1 - which technically takes away my diagnosis)

post #10 of 110

Are you talking about borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder?

post #11 of 110
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fruitful4Him View Post

Are you talking about borderline personality disorder or bipolar disorder?



They are talking about Borderline Personality Disorder. Bipolar Disorder doesn't have another acronym letter.

 

post #12 of 110
Quote:
Originally Posted by IwannaBanRN View Post





They are talking about Borderline Personality Disorder. Bipolar Disorder doesn't have another acronym letter.

 



Ah, okay. I was confused.

 

post #13 of 110

lol Aren't we all?.....  nut.gif

post #14 of 110

I have BPD.  I think the therapy you might be referring to is Dialectical Behavior Therapy?  I had that and it really helped a lot - I am so much more "even" now!

post #15 of 110

I have BPD. I dont really have anything to say about it right now. I was in DBT but have had to take a job so I can't go anymore... I am wondering if I need to file for disablity because even this little piddly job is to much stress for me... ugh ugh ugh.

I hate being mentally ill... I hate struggling with things other s can do with ease... I hate having a label now... even if it helps to help me... and has helped me to learn about it....I am struggling with my limitations and just want to be normal for once.

post #16 of 110

Hello All, (this is going to be long..lol)  Not trying to hi-jack here..but this is a new thing for me and I'm grasping for information!!

 

So..it just became apparent to me this week that I probably have this disorder.  Strangely, somehow I think I have learned how to manage MOST of my symptoms this disorder on my own, through meditation and just learning acceptance to a LOT of the things I can't control, however I still get these strong feelings of abandonment over small things (like DH wants to go and hang out with his friends for a couple hours).  But I try to do a lot of checking in with myself to figure out what is a real threat vs a perceived threat. 

 

To clarify, I haven't been diagnosed with this, but I've been doing a LOT of research these last few days and it all seems to be matching up with me.  Looking back, I have had issues with my behavior since I was probably 14 and now I'm 30.  I saw a psychiatrist when I was a teen and my mom found out I'd been cutting and I was having major tantrums over relatively small things.  But the guy didn't even talk to me.  He just had me fill out a questionaire for depression and then told me that I had anxiety and I was having panic attacks.  This summer I've been realizing that these are NOT anxiety attacks.  These are rage attacks that I ultimately end up doing self damage over.  I just recently even learned what BPD even is!  My only exposure to this illness up until recently was watching 'Girl Interrupted' in high school and I didn't think I acted like THAT girl so it didn't seem to fit.  But now I am taking psych nursing and since the very first day that my instructor said, "people who cut very often have BPD" that I've been wondering about this.  Then I had an interview with a client at my clinic who had BPD and was having a bit of a crisis, or HAD a bit of a crisis and was in to talk about how it was affecting her relationship, and I *saw* myself in her.  I kept thinking, 'I've done that, said that, thought that..ect.' 

 

DH and I are going to our marriage counselor today so I am going to bring all of this up with him while I'm there.  But he's not a psychiatrist, so he can't do any diagnosing.  I'm hoping he can help direct me and at least help me get some help dealing with some of the things that are still coming up. We only have really basic 'check-up' type insurance right now and we have no money to spend on a psychiatrist or Dialectical Behavioral Therapy class right now (the only ones I can find are $1400)  DH has also recently informed me that he has been diagnosed with bi-polar (don't know how I never noticed THAT before!!) Though is type of bi-polar is not the extreme type...so he is mostly depressed and his mania, is just his moments of being productive.  So needless to say, we have had some huge UPS and DOWNS in our relationship.  Since this summer when we started seeing a therapist, things have majorly improved doing a lot of the same things they talk about in Dialectical Behavioral Therapy..even though we didn't know what that was until recently.  But I know that I still start playing the blame game with him.  I often distort my thoughts to think that his (blank) is the cause of all my pain and suffering.  I push his buttons to points that it would be hard for ANYONE to stay calm, let alone someone dealing with their own mental illness.  I still have melt downs when I feel out of control and I still have occasions of doing self-harm.  I just wonder if getting a formal diagnosis and/or formal help would really help us deal with these episodes that still occur?

 

My main concern at this point is trying to find balance in my home and helping my son learn to deal with his own swinging emotions.  I'm 99% sure both my dad and my brother have this and it's probably where I picked up most of these behaviors..so I really want to help my son NOT do these same things.  I still want to grow my family and I have hope that we can actually make this a happy life for our kid(s). 

 

For those of you who have been working on this stuff for a long time, what works for you?

 

Either way, I'm happy to meet you out there who are also dealing with this!

post #17 of 110

Welcome. I would read all you can. That has helped me alot- and hurt me to... like I get absorbed into things to much.

I would look for a therapist that specializes in DBT and has a high success rate.

My behavior is worst when I am in a new relationship- be it man or woman romantic or platonic... tho I am learning to manage my symptoms with self talk and skills learned in DBT.  ( dialectyical (SP) behavior therapy.

post #18 of 110
Quote:
Originally Posted by Emilie2 View Post

Welcome. I would read all you can. That has helped me alot- and hurt me to... like I get absorbed into things to much.

I would look for a therapist that specializes in DBT and has a high success rate.

My behavior is worst when I am in a new relationship- be it man or woman romantic or platonic... tho I am learning to manage my symptoms with self talk and skills learned in DBT.  ( dialectyical (SP) behavior therapy.



Thanks..I can so relate to the getting too absorbed into things..lol.  I am doing it right now and I KNOW it!  I do this all the time.  I get really excited about something and then I just burn myself out and then something else comes along...

 

I'm hoping my marriage counselor can point me/us in the right direction.  I just wish I had real insurance right now..either that or a butt-load of money!

post #19 of 110

I think there is a lot of room for self help .... just acknowledging there is a problem goes a long way. I knew for years what I had was not just depression and anxiety but I just could not accept a personality disorder diagnosis....  until I just could not ignore it anymore...

and then things changed maybe my perspective?

It was like someone said- it would be ok and things have gotten better. I can catch myself before many behaviors now that are irrational.  And i have plenty...

post #20 of 110

Ok well I got back from my therapist a bit ago and he pretty much agreed with my analysis..lol.  He said he just hadn't really thought about it..wasn't on his radar or whatever.  Though he says he's not sure if what I have is true BPD or if I have learned these behaviors from my dad, but either way, the treatment will probably be the same and much of the treatment I need we have already been doing in our marriage counseling.  He is going to look into finding a group or class I can take to really help me deal with these episodes I still have.  He did say that if I have BPD though he feels I'm a pretty high functioning person with it.  I have a lot of insight about myself and most of the time the ability to see what I'm doing, even if I can't at this point stop myself from doing stupid things..like self harm.  Anyway, I feel relieved to know there's a reason I have been having tantrums well into my adulthood for all of these years.  I feel like knowing what I have and being honest with myself is half the battle.

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