How do you help them cope with going somewhere boring?

[ProtoLawyer]

So, my graduation is coming up (whee!).

There's a law school reception that should be OK--it'll be short (an hour and a half INCLUDING food and socializing time), there will be refreshments and other kids and such.

But the whole university graduation will be long (2 hours) and boring. We've got nobody to leave my six-year-old stepdaughter with (her mom's working, sitter moved away, and my parents and partner's parents will be going), so she will be attending. It'll be in a sports arena, and she'll be sitting in the seating bowl with her dad and the rest of the family.

We plan to let her take a small bag with a book, crayons, quiet stuff, etc. For some reason, that seems less rude than letting her take the Nintendo DS that her mom suggested. But I really don't know. This is a Catholic school, not that a graduation in an arena is the same as church, but I don't know how that would affect things.

Any advice for making this go smoothly?

[Rosehip]

My oldest is 4, so I don't have experience with a 6 yo, but...I think your bag of goodies sounds fine. Someone needs to be prepared to take her out, at least for a bathroom break once.

IF the Nintendo can be muted I would covertly take it along (an adult has it, she doesn't know). If the background noise is loud enough that the sound of her pushing the buttons wouldn't be annoying, I'd pull that out if she starts to get ancy (sp?). I'm thinking that since it's in an arena, there might be enough of a background hum that it might work.

If any of your classmates have kids, could you sit near them? I'm assuming it's not assigned seating.

I can't see the school being Catholic as mattering in general. There may well be a prayer or two, and of course, she needs to be respectful during that, but otherwise it should be a regular graduation.

[LynnS6]

I'm a faculty at a large (public) university and our graduation ceremony is LONG. Personally, I'd let her bring the Nintendo DS (with headphones), PLUS all the other stuff. No one is going to notice, but they will notice a cranky 6 year old. The other thing is: Bring food. You'll need to count on 3+ hours for the getting in and out, standing around, etc.

[USAmma]

I agree about letting her bring an electronic form of entertainment with headphones. You might consider borrowing a portable DVD player, too, if you know anyone who has one. Also plan for bathroom breaks and maybe a snack break out in the hallway.

[almama]

Before you go the DS route, you may want to try:

1. Asking her. A six year old could come up with a lot of ideas for 10 minute things, if you break it into segments. Make it seem like an adventure or a game. I also try to give my guys a draw, meaning asking them what they want to do afterward. If a great big ice cream sundae will do it, then why not?

2. Give her a camera or a camcorder. You could make her the official reporter.

3. Does she have a quiet friend she could bring along?

4. Asking her dad and g-parents for ideas of what they will do. I'm sure the last thing they want is for you to be worrying about it.

5. Make her a checklist of what will happen (it can be visual if she can't read). She can check off when the march song starts, maybe look for a friend of yours, see you, etc.

6. If she likes to draw, ask her to make a comic book of the day.

7. Give her some binoculars.

We're not DS/ electronic people though . . .

[MtBikeLover]

You already got some great suggestions but another one I thought of was a book on tape. Our library has these really cool devices (I forget the name) and they have a story loaded on them. All you need is a headset.

My DS is 6yo and loves books on tape and would do great listening to a story for a few hours.

[OakBerry]

If your stepdaughter is used to playing her ds, let her bring it. I think you can turn the volume down or off.

My son's best friend has a Ninetndo DS, and my son does not.
When we bring the friend out with us, he brings his DS in the car and plays it.
I don't particularly like it, I think it's rude to play a video game when you are sitting right next to your friend and he's trying to talk to you.
But, it's what the child is used to, what he does when he's with his parents in the car, so I don't make a big deal out of it.

[hipchick]

I just wanted to congratulate you on graduating from college. I wish you the best of luck. It sounds like you are doing the right thing by bringing a bag of toys and coloring books for dd. Two hours isn't too long. Just be sure to stress how important this is and maybe promise her a special treat if she is well behaved, which I am sure that she will be

[mommajb]

Bring someone to 'mind' her. Someone to leave with if needed, take her to the bathroom, whisper with her, etc. Unfortunately this person should not be shushing her so they can see you walk. Think of it like delivery, you've already done the labor.

[mamazee]

I don't think it would be rude for a 6-year-old to use a DS at something like that. I look at it from the child's viewpoint. How hard is it for a child that age to sit quietly through something like that? It's really awful. I don't see why bringing something pretty much guaranteed to keep a child quiet and happy is a problem.

[CarrieMF]

Take the bag of things for her to do.

Have DH take the ds but keep it hidden. Then if she starts wiggling/complaining too much he can pull it out for her. She can either have headphones or turn the sound off. My kids(6, 7 & 10) have no problems playing with the sound off.

We bought them DS's for xmas specifically for occassions like this where they have to be somewhere they'd consider boring.

[mamasee]

Remember to bring snacks! Those keep my dd occupied for at least two of those 10 min. segments during meetings.

Also, a new, unseen workbook and a pencil. Another key to success for my dd is that the things in the bag (or at least some of them) are surprises or items she hasn't played with in a long time.