About Harnesses - Page 2

[Mama Dragon]

This is why you leash a kid (no matter what kind of parent you THINK you are, stuff happens and .0000001/th of a second is all it takes to look away and back and see your kid under the bumper of a car:

In an exclusive interview with KGW, Lisa Itel said she saw everything.

"I actually saw a toddler come out to the crosswalk and thought to myself, 'that's weird a toddler's out in the crosswalk'... After I passed through the intersection, he [the suspected hit-and-run driver] made the left hand turn," Itel said.

What she saw next horrified her -- she saw the toddler get stuck under the front bumper of the pickup truck. After that, Itel said she pulled into the middle of the street and waved down the driver.

http://www.kgw.com/news-local/storie....1de69366.html

Not quite the lesson you want to teach a kid. If you have a runner, use a leash!

IMO and all that.

[tinyblackdot]

on the rare occassion that dd isnt in a carrier on my back we use the harness. i like for her to be able to walk without holding my hand if she wants to, but she cant run off.....and if she does i have something to grab on to LOL!

[StephandOwen]

Originally Posted by verde

Trust me on this. The first time you have a child who runs laughing into traffic or towards an escalator, you will instantly age about 50 years and then you will have a serious discussion with yourself about the use of a harness. The people whose kids don't run away just do not understand the complete terror a parent can feel when they have to chase that child and save her/him from certain death or, at minimum, potential maiming. Then you will look at that harness as a beautiful gift from the universe.

It's not an issue of degradation, it's an issue of saving lives.

:

I used to be one of those "I'd never use a harness, those are horrible devices and my child is not an animal" parents. And then my son taught me otherwise

[waiting2bemommy]

Originally Posted by queenjane

If you have a child who "behaves" in public spaces and doesnt try to run away, it MAY have more to do with that child's personality than anything you're doing as a parent. Its easy to say "if he doesnt behave we leave"....until you actually have to get some shopping done. And some kids dont mind sitting in the cart, so its not much of a punishment/deterrent to say "if you dont behave you'll sit in the cart" yknow?

Yup, ds is only 14 months, so the worst is probably still yet to come....i may be eating my words in a few months, lol. He is VERY stubborn, and we have had showdowns in the store before over not touching stuff. But he is learning....it's not an overnight thing, and he jsut isn't going to have the same self control as a big person, so I try t keep that in mind.

[St. Margaret]

My kid jumps to my side if I say her name too sharply, and will hold on to my hand devotedly. She's just programmed that way. I'll try to just walk with her and she'll grab my hand. It always has to be the same hand, too.

But my friend's kid will just take off and wander, explore, run-- and darn straight she uses a monkey backpack (she was pregnant by the time her kid was running, too!). I don't think using something to keep your kid safe is bad at all. And I think there is plenty of time when a toddler is an older preschooler to develop a sense of how to stay close and when it's okay to wander a little or a lot. I see having the backpack as being developmentally appropriate, at least for some kids.

[Lisa1970]

The leash part is generally short enough that the child does not get more than a foot or two from you. I have one that looks like a stuffed monkey. It is so cute! If your child is too difficult with it and you can return him or her to the stroller, then I would return the child to the stroller.

[Lisa1970]

As far as the mentality of "I won't use a harness, that is for dogs." Well, people use them for dogs to keep the dogs safe and close by. Not to hurt them. I love my child way more than a dog, therefore, I will use it for my child. I am more concerned about the safety and welfare of my child than any dog, so, I will do whatever is available to me for his safety.

I hope that helps.

[TinkerBelle]

Originally Posted by waiting2bemommy

I have the same issue with the harness...that it becomes a crutch for not teaaching good manners and safe behavior. i let ds walk without holding my hand quite frequently, even in the grocery store. People think i'm crazy, but he is well behaved, and he knows he will be worn or sit in the cart if he does not behave. i consider those places opporuntity to teach ds about acceptable behavior, in a safe environment where the worst that could happen is knocking over the ketchiup.

i reserve the harness for times like when i had to carry a dufel bag, suitcase, carseat stroller, backpack and ds through Penn Station, NY at 11:30 PM. I ended up waearing him anyway . But in potentialy dangerous situations I see the value of the harness. That ebing said, I don't even know where mine is, so that tells you how often I use it.....

I am sure that there are parents who do as you describe, but most I know, who have used a leash/harness, do so as a last resort, and use it as a safety net, so to speak, and in addition to teaching the child what is expected of him/her.

The assumptions astound me, I have to say.

[Needle in the Hay]

We used one around the 18-24 months range for sure, maybe a little later or earlier, I can't remember. We didn't use it all that much but mostly when we were:
-walking along a port as there were no barriers, if you stepped off the sidewalk, you were falling into the port. We lived in a town with a port and visited other towns with ports as we lived on the Mediterranean. I think DS, if paying attention, would not have walked off the sidewalk into the port, but he had the habit of looking back at us and while walking and would start going at an angle. And of course all the other things that can distract a little one!

-hiking where there were drop-offs. Again in the south of France there were not a lot of child safety measures in place. At a few points along the hike, you could take a few steps off the hiking trail and be a goner. These were not extreme trails or anything, it's just how it was down there, you gotta keep your kids safe 'cos no one's going to do it for you.

-once when we took an overnight ferry and were walking around the open-air deck. Falling off the top of that boat is like falling several stories out of a window.

It didn't prevent any learning about the dangers. Obviously we weren't relying on the harness to save him from falling off a cliff or into a port, it was more to keep him from getting too close in the first place and of course we would tell him why we all needed to stay more on this side. It gave him a lot more freedom of movement than hand holding and I think helped him better see the dangers, actually.