HSing a child with ADHD??? Help

[emilys_mom1]

Are there any others out there that hsing a child with ADHD? My 7 yr DD was just diagnoised and I wondering if other have some tips for me to help her be successful.

[Lillian J]

I was looking for an uplifting article I used to have bookmarked, and I'll keep looking - but I found this page I thought you'd enjoy:

ADD - Positive Quotes - Lillian

[umbrella]

Our oldest has adhd, and it really helps to take advantage of the time when She is focused on something. She has a lot of control over her own schedule. She regularly gets into a groove on her own, in the late evening, and could work diligently for 90 minutes straight. However, if you try to set her down at the table because it's 9:30am and "time" to work on this or that, she'll be needing a break pretty quickly, and it will generally not be nearly as efficient.

You could say we're non-coercive when it comes to studies. I end up picking out the majority of subjects and materials used, and I pay attention to know good times to suggest we work on some times, but if she's not in the mood right then, I let it go. Or if she gets to the point where she says she needs to stop for now, then we stop. The pushiest I get about scheduling, would be reminding her of her own goals, if she's blown me off a few times in a row. But even then, it's not me saying, "Hey, you do this now," but telling her to remember to make the time soon. It's like an unspecified suggestion that the next time she's transitioning between activities, to consider if it's a good time to work on her studies.

[hotmamacita]

I really dislike the ADD and ADHD labels/dianosis. I have strong opinions on why I think they have come about but I will not go into it here.

"I've worked with many children, and took them all off medication. I think out of all the many we've worked with, there was one little boy we couldn't do much with... But with most of these children, I was told that they were 'little animals', couldn't sit still, were disruptive, couldn't do anything; under my guidance, I found them to be beautiful; they would die for you." - Marie Friedel, Founder and Executive Director, National Foundation for Gifted and Creative Children.

[hotmamacita]

Originally Posted by emilys_mom1

Are there any others out there that hsing a child with ADHD? My 7 yr DD was just diagnoised and I wondering if other have some tips for me to help her be successful.

I am almost positive you are already doing these things but just to encourage and remind you:

Love her. Feed her nourishing foods and greatly reduce sugar and artificial or processed foods. Do not relate to her as if she has some deficiency or "special condition". Protect her from any social or interpersonal shame or backlash with such a label. Play with her, engage her, listen to her, enjoy and maybe look into gifted and talented curricula. But she is young and a child and I would protect her love of learning. Oh and, of course, trust your instincts!

[twilight girl]

Originally Posted by hotmamacita

I really dislike the ADD and ADHD labels/dianosis. I have strong opinions on why I think they have come about but I will not go into it here.

Well, since you're going to come out this far, you might as well post your argument. Especially for those of us living with an ADHD label/diagnosis.

In our case, it most certainly is helpful. It gives us tools to present information to our DD in a way that makes sense to her, and we get much further by having a label/diagnosis, than by forcing her square peg self into the round hole school.

She most definitely is ADHD. But, that doesn't mean that she takes drugs or is less valued. She is creative, energetic, spontaneous, intelligent and loving. She is also prone to be hyperactive, hyperfocused, and explosive. She is also a visual spatial learner. And by knowing all this about her, I can more effectively parent her, and soon, more effectively homeschool her.

My ADHD child learns very efficiently on a one-on-one basis, but gets lost in the group environment of the school. Without our label, we would end up all very frustrated, and probably with a kid in detention a lot of the time.

I have an ADHD husband with a Master's degree who was told in high school he should probably consider vocational school, because academics were not his forte. He has an ADHD cousin with a PhD and who has published 4 books, who was told by a high school counselor that he would most likely end up in jail before he was 20.

The label does not define the person, rather it challenges the rest of us to step up to the difficulty of presenting the information in a way that makes sense to them, because behind that label is an extraordinary person. If we unlock the secret, that ADHD person will likely achieve great things. If we don't unlock the secret, they might just end up in jail before they're 20!

I wonder do you really object to the label/diagnosis, or do you object to what people are doing based on the label/diagnosis (i.e., resorting to drugs)?

To the OP--> I am preparing to pull my ADHD DD from 1st grade to homeschool. I am looking into Sue Patrick's Workbox System. There is another thread here that links to it (something about flexible structure). We're also looking for ways to teach the visual spatial learner.

[hotmamacita]

To be sensitive and respectful to the enormity of the issues at hand, I really do not want to post my opinions in any more detail. Furthermore, I do not have any argument or fight to pick about the topic. I respect each mother's right and unique position of mothering their child(ren).

[umbrella]

But with most of these children, I was told that they were 'little animals', couldn't sit still, were disruptive, couldn't do anything; under my guidance, I found them to be beautiful; they would die for you.

Wow. What a creepy thing to say.

[hotmamacita]

I agree. The whole approach by some adults is so offensive.

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by umbrella

Wow. What a creepy thing to say.

Yeah, I thought so too - and that's one of the things I found on the page I linked to earlier, and it almost stopped me from using the link, but there was so much in the way of more uplifting things there that I just tried to ignore that one. - Lillian

[umbrella]

I really dislike the ADD and ADHD labels/dianosis. I have strong opinions on why I think they have come about but I will not go into it here.

I don't know what your assumptions are related to this diagnosis, but saying you don't "like" it, I'm not seeing how it's a helpful thing to say.

When we were told that our dd1 has ADHD, we were told so that we could gather information. We were outright told that it doesn't not have to a hindrance all, especially as homeschoolers, and that for many adults it can in fact be a real asset (but that traditional school environments can be difficult for some children with adhd, especially if the family remains uniformed). She doesn't even know at this point, what ADHD is. She just doesn't remember the conversation that the doc and I had all that time ago, and it just doesn't come up right now.

My dh also had adhd. He eventually had academic success, but knowing about it in elementary school could have made a real difference in his quality of life then. Also realizing it even as he is an adult, has helped me to understand some of the issues that lead to frustration between the two of us. Information is good thing.

The Other labels that can be assigned to a child when it's not known that they have ADHD, aren't so great.

[twilight girl]

Originally Posted by hotmamacita

To be sensitive and respectful to the enormity of the issues at hand, I really do not want to post my opinions in any more detail. Furthermore, I do not have any argument or fight to pick about the topic. I respect each mother's right and unique position of mothering their child(ren).

The I fail to see your reason for posting on this thread to begin with.

[hotmamacita]

Umbrella, I do not mean to be unhelpful or to tell the OP that I do not like her child's particular diagnosis. Sorry I gave that impression.

I think the OP should trust her instincts and do what she feels is best for her child with care providers and information that she trusts and not get caught up in fear, labels or worry.

[hotmamacita]

Originally Posted by twilight girl

The I fail to see your reason for posting on this thread to begin with.

I did not understand your post here until I looked back at my previous posts. It looks like I did not finish my thought in my earlier post. I intended to thank Lillian for the link to the positive quotes about ADD except that the one quote was a little disconcerting.

[elizawill]

op, i would highly recommend looking into the feingold diet: http://www.feingold.org/

[Lillian J]

Originally Posted by hotmamacita

I did not understand your post here until I looked back at my previous posts. It looks like I did not finish my thought in my earlier post. I intended to thank Lillian for the link to the positive quotes about ADD except that the one quote was a little disconcerting.

I assumed it was something like that - that sure was a strange thing for them to include in their page as something they considered "positive" - Lillian