Moms who claim their kids will only eat chicken nuggets etc...

[Valrock]

I wonder about this.

Are there really kids out there that are this picky? I'm serious... maybe I've been blessed with two children who would rather eat a bowl of steel cut oats with maple syrup than a bowl of lucky charms (shudder lol). But I don't understand this.

They've been eating whole foods since they started eating table food. Yeah, we've had the occasional chicken nugget but they're certainly not a dinner table staple. My four year old says his favorite food is fish on the grill and "trees" (broccoli) LOL.

Is it one of those nature versus nurture debates?

[Norasmomma]

I am a huge believer that it is what they have been given. If you let them have chicken nuggets all. the. time then of course that's all they will want to eat. I will say my DD has a great appetite and will eat pretty much anything, but there are days when all she wants is milk(like today).

My IL's are always trying to feed her crap, and she turns her nose up at it. She doesn't like Capri Sun and we don't let her drink pop, thank you. My niece gives her 2 y/o pop, that is conditioning her to drink it, how sad.

I believe it is nurture.

[Masel]

My DD's diet is severely constrained by food allergies. There's one brand of nuggets I could find without her main allergens. The is one of the few "normal" foods she can have at family gatherings and with friends. (I've made nuggets before but with all the cousins it is so much easier to buy premade.) Anyway, chicken nuggets have some magical cachet with DD now. I certainly don't indulge this all the time but they are her favoritest food in the world.

[lavieenrose]

I think it's definitely nurture, but sometimes nature (in the form of allergies) can affect this as well.

My daughter eats anything and everything because I started her on whole foods, foods of other cultures, etc. She has no trouble trying something new. She also doesn't have any food sensitivities that we've found.

I guess we're lucky.

[RunnerDuck]

I tend to find a child who claims to love fish and broccoli above all else to be just as mind boggling as a child who will eat "nothing" besides chicken nuggets.

Nature vs. nurture arguments never seem to serve much purpose other than to give people something to talk about. Ie - the problem never seems solvable but it's fun to chew on. I do know that my parents tried very hard to get us to eat broccoli as kids and we hated it. I heard something a few years back on NPR that kids have more bitter taste receptors than adults, which is why kids don't like veggies, but grow to like them as adults. I don't think it's just a matter of learning it's good for you, so you eat it, and you get used to it. Ie I used to HATE spinach. I LOVE it now. It's the only topping I ever have on pizza and it's because I LOVE it. I love broccoli now, too - esp. raw which I used to HATE - even as a young adult I would only eat it cooked. Now I like it better raw. So I don't know, my parents tried, but it didn't work.

To me, nature seems like a strong argument here.

BUT without nurture there'd be no exposure so who knows.

[pinksprklybarefoot]

I think that there is a small subset of children out there will sensory issues, and the parents of those children probably do whatever they can to get there child to eat something, anything. That said, I believe that this is rare.

In the US, we are so conditioned to think that kids only like chicken nuggets, mac n cheese, and pizza. So we feed our children these foods. They taste good, but are bland enough so that if you start your child off on these foods, the taste of broccoli is going to be pretty strong in comparison.

With DS, I've made a conscious decision to expose him to all sorts of foods, especially different kinds of vegetables. He eats what we eat for dinner, and we eat a pretty varied diet. We'll see what happens. We are vegan, so many of the traditional "kids' menu" options aren't available to us anyway.

My DSD was a fruit, yogurt, and white bread kind of gal when I met her 4 years ago. Now that she has been eating dinners with us for so many years where she has been expected to try things, she is a much more adventurous eater. I am always reminded of it when we have a friend of hers over for dinner - compared to DSD, she won't eat anything. But her parents feed her the SAD.

[cherimoya]

I have 2 friends that have 5/6 yo sons that have very limited diets and both Moms blame themselves.....something like "oh when he was very young he liked chicken nuggets and cheese pizza so that's all I gave him!!". Seriously?! Now both of them regret it and it's hard to feed their kids anything else. imo, the rest of the family doesn't eat a wide variety either (from what I've seen they eat a lot of packaged, overly-processed foods). I personally find it strange & very interesting since I was brought up eating all sorts of different foods and my dks eat a huge variety too.

At first I thought they were just joking but then I had one of the boys here for dinner every 2nd week during the summer. First night was a complete bust, he didn't like anything and didn't even know what cantaloupe or honey-dew melon was! So I asked him what he liked, he said chicken nuggets! So the next time I made beautiful home-made nuggets, but before they were even on the table he said "yuck, what's that? NO, NO, chicken nuggets have to come out of the red bag out of the freezer". Whoa! The next time I bought frozen pepperoni pizza and that wasn't 100% either because he only likes "cheese pizza". OMG! Eventually the dinners stopped for many other reasons, and I haven't missed them.

The other MOm and her son came over for lunch one time and I had the usual ww bread, hummus, avocado, sliced meats, cheese and lots of berries & fruit to choose from. The Mom was impressed and her son only ate some meat and cheese - only likes white bread. Oh and he was not impressed that we only had water to drink!

I hate to compare, because it definitely makes me sound like a food-snob, but I seriously don't understand why parents are ok with this, why they wouldn't go through the hassle of trying different foods. My dd now is constantly rejecting different foods (mainly bf) but that's her age and one week she likes strawberries and the next not and yes, it's a hassle to constantly think of different foods and preparing them etc but that's the experience, right?!

Oh and I think some of it might also have to do with whether someone was brought up in a house where parent(s) cooked or not. Both my parents worked as chefs/cooks when I was young, so we were always cooking in the home.

[AllyRae]

My son's been in feeding therapy since August because he literally would starve himself--he went 4 days without eating or drinking anything and before/after that he had 2 or 3 foods that he would eat. He was drastically underweight (32 lbs at almost 5 years old). He was anemic. He was the kid who wouldn't even eat the chicken nuggets! LOL!!

But we're also a believer of "don't give them crap if you don't want that to be the only food they eat". As picky as he is, we still didn't pull out the deep fryer. His chicken nuggets were baked, fries were baked, and we fed him as many fruits/veggies/whole/healthy foods as we could. We told his feeding therapist to *not* get him to eat HFCS products or spaghetti-os, etc. because we wouldn't be feeding him those at home--that we needed the therapist to work with him on eating the types of foods we served (well, she did get him to eat a hot dog, but now we just buy all natural all beef no nitrate hot dogs as a compromise. : ) We made his feeding therapist use healthy foods as part of therapy.

My son is autistic and has sensory issues. Even in his no-eating phase we never loaded him up on fast food because if he was only going to eat one food, we wanted it to be something with nutrition. It turned out his one food that he was going to eat day in and day out and nothing else was a sunflower seed butter and strawberry preserves sandwich on whole grain organic bread--I'll take that.

[charleysmama23]

My sister's ds1 is VERY picky and VERY stubborn, but that's because he has chosen food to be his battle ground for testing his limits (he's 4 1/2). He gest mixed signals from mom & dad when it comes to boundaries so he pushes a lot. He gets so upset about it that even when he DOES try a new food he often gags and throws up (not always, but often). Anyway, my sister says it's all because when he was 2-ish she started making dinner for her and her dh and then asking ds1 what he wanted for dinner...so now he expects that all the time. They're working on it, but it's really hard. My point is that in their case it was absolutely the choices/mistakes of the parents that lead to their current picky situation...but that's just them.

[choli]

It's hard to tell, isn't it? It would be interesting to see if there has been research into this in developing countries. Are children less inclined to have "sensory issues" and food allergies and pickiness in general when food is scarce and hunger is common? Or is this attitude to food common in all societies?

[425lisamarie]

I have no idea but every so often I WISH my kids preferred the simplicity of a chicken nugget. I have to pound and bread them myself

Of course I'm kidding but I'm sure it's tough having a picky kid, wether you did it yourself to them or not. Problem is people assume kids want the nasty "kid food" like plastic cheese and such. My kids wouldn't eat a chicken nugget. In fact I tried buying some premium brand and they looked at my cross eyed like "what, you're not cooking me dinner LOL?" I think once people give the young kids nuggets and hotdogs every day for so long it's hard to open up their palate again

[Llyra]

I think some kids are just picky. That said, though, they'll "pick" from what they are offered. My DD1 had a VERY limited diet up until only about a month ago. She's never really been offered junk food, but she did have a list of about four things she'd eat, and that was it. For her, it was peaches, yogurt, pasta, and peas, (and sometimes chicken, if it had no skin, no browned or blackened parts, and no sauce or seasoning at all), which isn't a bad spread, all things considered. But that was ALL she'd eat. If it wasn't offered, she'd wait. Patiently. She'd wait DAYS, and then when she finally had access to those foods, she'd eat as much as she could hold. We haven't given up, and lately she's branching out more, but I certainly deny that it's anything I did or left undone that made her so picky-- we eat a staggering variety of wonderfully nourishing foods in this house. Also, my other two aren't like that-- they eat tiny amounts, but they'll try anything.

Some kids are just conservative when it comes to food.

[Keria]

I have not met a toddler that didnt like broccoli carrots and lots of veggies, and I have yet to meet 6 yo that was crazy about veggies.

[tinuviel_k]

While there are a few kids out there who have true sensory issues I'm willing to bet that 90% of picky kids are simply that...picks.

One friend of mine's daughter will ONLY eat chicken nuggets, cheese, french toast sticks, apples, and juice at home. Her mom claims she won't touch anything else. She bribes her to eat other foods with sweets.

Its downright amazing, though... When she spends the day at our house she eats what we eat. Sure, there is an initial "I don't like that!" But we don't keep chicken nuggets and french toast in the house. After five minutes of complaining she jumps right into the carrot sticks, grilled cheese on whole wheat bread, tomato soup, salad, or whatever we are having. She eats it, enjoys it, usually says "That was good!" Hmmmmm...

[RunnerDuck]

Originally Posted by *Louise*

I have not met a toddler that didnt like broccoli carrots and lots of veggies, and I have yet to meet 6 yo that was crazy about veggies.

There is something to be said for this.

My babies will eat ANYTHING. (I mean ANYTHING... right now they both eat dirt if we're outside, and one of them I once caught sucking on a dryer sheet...)

My son used to love cauliflower and broccoli - but only part of it, I can't remember if he liked the fluffy part or the stems... but now he won't touch any of it. He does love carrots, though (He's 5) As a kid, carrots were my fave. veggie, too. Carrots and cukes - he likes cukes, too.

So already he's started to like... and has grown out of... some things.

No amount of cajoling will fix it. Whenever I have a veggie I go crazy saying to DH "Oh this is so good, this is amazing" etc trying to get DS interested... we might as well be eating dirt.

Which he doesn't like, just the babies.

[tracyhos]

I used to think it was just a cop out. Then my 3rd came along. He doesn't like nuggets, but he is insanely picky. He eats healthy; but there are like 10 things he likes. Cheese in any form (slice, chunk, string). Yogurt, bananas, waffles, milk, OJ, crackers, my homemade banana or pumpkin bread, and dry cereal. That is it. He will not eat anything else. He is 3. I can't hold him down and make him eat. We try to get him to eat other things, and he simply won't do it. He would rather not eat all day than eat something that he doesn't like.

My other 2 are wonderful eaters. There are a few things they don't like, but overall they are great eaters....

So...anyhoo. That is my 2 cents.

[puffingirl]

I'll add that I was really picky as a kid. I'd eat a variety of healthy things, but I didn't like sauces on anything, veggies had to be raw and new things freaked me out. Seriously, like I'd get anxiety attacks when presented with new foods and getting invites to eat at a friend's house would make me nervous for days. Thankfully, I outgrew a lot of that and am an adventurous eater now. I don't think it had anything to do with the food my parents presented--it was just me. When I was pregnant, I reverted to a very limited diet for at least 4 months. I ate grilled cheese, potatoes, very cold canned fruit and chicken soup. Almost anything else was completely horrific for me. By the tail end of my 2nd trimester I was back to my normal diet (minus spicy stuff that gave me awful heartburn ). But it really reminded me of how real food aversions can be. DD is only 20 months and is a fantastic eater now (we just split a sampler platter at our local Middle Eastern restaurant), but I won't be surprised if she gets picky later.

[AuntLavender]

Oh I used to be feel that way too!

My older 3 kids ate everything! I like to cook and with several children it's too expensive to eat out.

Then my fourth came along. He is physically disabled. He also has low muscle tone in his tongue. He is almost 6 and can now move his tongue side to side and you need to be able to do that to eat! He still cannot touch his top lip with his tongue.

I am delighted when he eats anything! That being said I breastfed him until he was 5 because that was the healthiest thing he would eat.

It's easy to blame mom when you haven't walked in her shoes.

That being said my son ate 2 one inch slices of pumpkin pie yesterday for the first time ever! He eats very few veggies and no fruits save the occasional swallow of apple juice. I took a photo!

I serve nutricious foods yet my son refuses most of them. Is it nature or nurture? I don't think I parent him differently. He was my 4th not my first or second.


Sincerely,
Debra, homeschooling mom of 4 ages 12, 11, 9, and 5

[Llyra]

Originally Posted by *Louise*

I have not met a toddler that didnt like broccoli carrots and lots of veggies

I"d like to introduce you to my DD1, then. She has never eaten veggies. Even as a baby, when she was first allowed to play around with food and try it, she staunchly rejected most foods. She ate peas, carrots, and tomatoes (which aren't even really veggies) and that's it, and even those she'd USUALLY reject. Just every once in a while she'd try one. And as a toddler, she ate tomatoes, sometimes, and peas occasionally, and that's it. Peaches, yogurt, pasta, sometimes tomatoes or peas, occasionally plain chicken, and for a brief time in late infancy she liked oatmeal.

I never gave her junk to get her to eat. I never bribed or begged her to eat. I never made alternate meals, so that she'd eat. And it's not just for me. She won't eat at school, or at my mother's house, or at my brother's house, or anywhere else for that matter. She has always been offered tasty, nutritious, in-season, local food, all homemade and appetizing. She won't eat any of it. She just waits until the meal includes what she likes, and then eats.

I think that people who don't believe that kids can be picky all on their own, despite their parents doing everything right, are very lucky. They've never had a picky kid. So they can go ahead and make generalizations about WHY kids are picky. Until it happens to them.

I do agree, though, that even a picky child will pick from what's offered. So the one sure solution to a child who won't eat anything but XYZ is to stop buying XYZ. But then they fixate on some other food.

It really does happen, and it irritates me when people seem to imply it's always the parents' fault.

[Viola]

My kids have texture issues, or at least my older one does. She has gotten to the point where she would rather just not eat than eat foods she doesn't like. For years I thought she just didn't like bread, because I always had sprouted grain bread in the house. But once she got a sandwich with white bread, and lo and behold, she started eating bread. She would very specifically tell me, "buy this kind of bread, the white kind, not brown." I would buy a soft kind of multigrain bread and make her a sandwich for her school lunch, but she wouldn't eat it, she chose to make do with the other stuff in her lunchbox, and then would complain she was hungry once she was home. Same with whole wheat pasta or spaghetti sauce or brown rice, even when disguised under other stuff. Now she mostly eats sourdough bread.

Sometimes she would try new things at other people's homes, and I would think, "hooray, I've found a new food she'll eat." But then she wouldn't like it the next time she encountered it, so I think it was just the novelty of being somewhere else. Or we had situations where she was at other people's homes and was quite vocal about not liking the food, and not eating it. I actually had to cut short a visit during lunch time when she didn't like the food offered, and I felt she was being rude and we should leave.

So, I don't know. I do believe that if she were truly hungry enough, she would eat foods that were distasteful to her, just as starving people would eat many things a non-starving person would avoid. I was never willing to actually push the issue. My husband is extremely pick and will go for about a day and a half without eating anything if he doesn't like the food being served (like when we are visiting somewhere), and then he finds a way to stop off and buy something to eat that is palatable to him.