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Other parents disapproving of proper terms? - Page 7

post #121 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by MusicianDad View Post
The Romans would be my guess. Vagina is Latin for "sheath" or "Scabbard".

I will cook this crow over the heat of your white-hot sarcasm, and eat it over there in the corner. :

I confused two parts of a drawn-out conversation of long ago re: the etimology of words like vagina and woman. "poursthegibletgravy:
post #122 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by limabean View Post
Who is being falsely superior? I think Storm Bride is just explaining (exceptionally well, IMO) how it comes to be that some people use the word "vagina" to describe visible female genitalia. She's not advocating that people continue to do so, I don't think, just saying why they do it.
I don't think that using the word vagina is any more defensible than using the word frog, or chichi, or any of the other ones mentioned.

Her explaination as to why some women call their vulva a "vagina" is the same as people who were taught to call it something else like "frog".
post #123 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliveMama View Post
I don't think that using the word vagina is any more defensible than using the word frog, or chichi, or any of the other ones mentioned.

Her explaination as to why some women call their vulva a "vagina" is the same as people who were taught to call it something else like "frog".
I edited my earlier post -- I'm not sure if you saw the edit. I guess SB and I aren't explaining ourselves well if what you're taking away from the discussion is that we think "vagina" is an acceptable synonym for "vulva."
post #124 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by number572 View Post
Just as a "ime" post - I completed a yoga teacher training a while back and thought of this when I read this thread. We were all sitting around discussing the class we'd just taken and a classmate of ours (a female) commented on a certain asana, she said "I feel intimidated when I do this (certain) asana in a public class b'c I take air into my vagina when entering the pose, and then upon releasing the asana (yoga pose), I have a sort of vaginal "fart" how can I avoid that?".

OMG, you would have thought we were a room of ten yr old boys. I was thrown by the students laughing & mocking...

It was weird... many people are sort of closed when correct terminology is used. Embarrassed even. I hope that changes, it gets in the way of very real factors. And real solutions.

Best luck on trying to enlighten OR ignore them!
post #125 of 239
Well, this has to be one of the best threads I have read in a very long time. My twin girls were napping on my lap when I was reading it and I had to be careful not to laugh out loud.

Thanks for the education on vulva-- I knew it, but not enough to actually tell them the correct terminology, so I will be forever in your debt.
post #126 of 239
I admit I have not read every post (stopped on page 4).

We use penis and vagina in our house. It seems natural that way. I am perfectly aware of the vulva/clitoris/urethra/perineum/labia/hymen but it seems natural to just use vagina when talking to our 2 year old. We will get into more details when appropriate.

My DD used to say peanut. As in, "daddy has a peanut." DH wasn't too excited about that. I thought it was hilarious.

DD also says nipples and breast-es. As in, "the baby will have nums from mommy's breast-es/nipples." Or "I no can give my baby nums. I no have breast-es."

I definitely don't understand using "cute-sy" language. Body parts are not something to be ashamed of!
post #127 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflowergirll View Post
We use penis and vagina in our house. It seems natural that way. I am perfectly aware of the vulva/clitoris/urethra/perineum/labia/hymen but it seems natural to just use vagina when talking to our 2 year old. We will get into more details when appropriate.
Why is vagina "natural"? My interactions with my 2yo DD are basically always about her vulva. I can only think of one time when we talked about her vagina. And that was me telling her that she shouldn't stick her finger into it because her hands were dirty.

Everything else is about her vulva. She needs to wipe the pee from he vulva after going pee. She needs to wipe from her vulva to bum after she poops so that poop doesn't get into her vulva (we're concerned about both the vagina and the urethra in that case). It's all about her vulva. Her vagina isn't really in play yet.
post #128 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliveMama View Post
How is it any different to ignorantly call your vulva a "vagina" than to call you vulva any of the other words that are used, they are all just as wrong.

That's what I don't understand about this discussion. 1 type of ignorance is no better than another kind. The false superiority really bugs me.
I'm sorry. I must have missed where I said it was okay to be ignorant. I was simply arguing that people who mistakenly used the term "vagina" when referring to a woman's entire genitalia were not, in fact, ignoring the clitoris, labia, etc. and saying that the vagina is the only important part. I've known many people who called a woman's entire genitalia the "vagina" who were still very aware of the clitoris, labia, etc. and considered them very important. Heck - I called the whole area the vagina for years, and I can assure you that I was very aware of how important the clitoris is!

In any case, someone calling a girl's genitalia a "frog" isn't actually ignorant. I'm forced to assume that a mom telling her daughter that her daughter's genitalia is a "frog" actually does know that it isn't. She just can't bring herself to teach a little girl a "bad" (??) word. I was ignorant of the actual word.

I'm not saying ignorant is better or worse, but it's definitely not the same.
post #129 of 239
Well...I'm just going to admit that I didn't know what a vulva, yoni, or clitoris was until a year or so ago. : Now, my dd knows vulva. She's constantly interested in why I have hair on my vulva, but she doesn't. However, she still thinks she pees from her butt...so we've got a ways to go.

Btw, the in-laws thought it was hilarious when dd declared "I have little nursies" to everyone as she was getting changed into jammies.
post #130 of 239
Now see you mention "nursies" - lots of breastfeeding mothers have children with nicknames for the breast. That doesn't mean they won't also be told (or haven't already been told) that it's called a breast, they just have another word that they also like to use. What's wrong with that?
post #131 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by churndash View Post
Now see you mention "nursies" - lots of breastfeeding mothers have children with nicknames for the breast. That doesn't mean they won't also be told (or haven't already been told) that it's called a breast, they just have another word that they also like to use. What's wrong with that?
or nums... and I do not get it. My daughters call my boobs, boobs, or breasts, depending on which term I most frequently refer to them. They call nipples, nipples. They call nursing, nursing. ...... Sophia asks to nurse by saying, 'Mommy, can I nurse, pleeeeeease?'

I think 'num nums' and various other terms are silly. It's as though the mom is too embarrassed to have their child say the world nurse out loud in public and has trained their child to say some other term to avoid feeling embarrassed.
post #132 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Purity♥Lake~ View Post
I think 'num nums' and various other terms are silly. It's as though the mom is too embarrassed to have their child say the world nurse out loud in public and has trained their child to say some other term to avoid feeling embarrassed.
My kids are the ones who chose their own names for nursing. I called it nursing/nurse and they both came up with their own names. What's wrong with that? I can assure you that I'm not embarrassed to have my kids say nursing/breast/nipple in public. There was no training going on at all. I think in the case of breastfeeding a lot of babies/toddlers have a hard time saying nurse or nursing so they coin a word of their own.

I really don't get why silly names for body parts bother people at all really. boobs are a slang/silly term for breasts.
post #133 of 239
mamafreya, I didn't say I was bothered by it. I said I don't understand when parents teach their children to use silly names instead of teaching them the proper term. Obviously, that doesn't apply to you.
post #134 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Purity♥Lake~ View Post
mamafreya, I didn't say I was bothered it. I said I don't understand when parents teach their children to use silly names instead of teaching them the proper term. Obviously, that doesn't apply to you.
Sorry, I understood that. I should've been more clear in my post. I stepped away for a sec and then came back to it but I forgot to reread it.

What I meant to include was that I think with nursing it's way more common for babes to make up their own words for nursing then it is with genitalia. I think that in the case of naming genitals it's more common for the parents to be the one to make up silly names. I guess it just seemed like such a different situation that I thought the example wasn't accurate. I've never known another women to make up her kids name for nursing. In my experience it was always the LO who named the breasts.

Anyway, I do think that it's super important to make sure that children and adults know the proper terms for their body parts no matter what you choose to call them. I want my kids to grow up knowing what their body parts are called and also what the opposite sex body parts are called as well. I don't see anything wrong with kids saying penis/vulva/vagina, I really just don't know why it would upset someone if they heard a kid say penis or vagina. Also, I don't think using silly names is bad either as long as the child knows that they are just silly names.
post #135 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by because why not? View Post
I will cook this crow over the heat of your white-hot sarcasm, and eat it over there in the corner. :

I confused two parts of a drawn-out conversation of long ago re: the etimology of words like vagina and woman. "poursthegibletgravy:
Glad I could help with dinner.
post #136 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Storm Bride View Post
I'm sorry. I must have missed where I said it was okay to be ignorant. I was simply arguing that people who mistakenly used the term "vagina" when referring to a woman's entire genitalia were not, in fact, ignoring the clitoris, labia, etc. and saying that the vagina is the only important part. I've known many people who called a woman's entire genitalia the "vagina" who were still very aware of the clitoris, labia, etc. and considered them very important. Heck - I called the whole area the vagina for years, and I can assure you that I was very aware of how important the clitoris is!

In any case, someone calling a girl's genitalia a "frog" isn't actually ignorant. I'm forced to assume that a mom telling her daughter that her daughter's genitalia is a "frog" actually does know that it isn't. She just can't bring herself to teach a little girl a "bad" (??) word. I was ignorant of the actual word.

I'm not saying ignorant is better or worse, but it's definitely not the same.
Thank you SB, this hits it right on the nose. My mom didn't want to say "vagina" or "vulva" because they were impolite like curse words.


Bottom line: old habits are hard to break. I may die and never really feel fully comfortable with "vulva" or "yoni" as terms to use in my everyday life. Probably because I am not sitting around talking about female genitals on a regular basis (since I'm not pregnant and my kids are boys, so really what's there to discuss if everything is functioning normally?). I know the correct term, I have passed it on to my children.

I truly do not understand the reasons for me being attacked for a word I use privately and rarely (vag). (Aside from the fact that my mom had the wierdest code word for genitals and therefore it is a good example of ridiculousness).

((Actually, come to think of it, when I am speaking about my "lady bits" I am not often referring to the part you can see, unless it's to my son - and then I say vulva. Hmmm, perhaps I do use it correctly. Something to ponder for myself there))
post #137 of 239
Thank you so much for the vagina/vulva education. I knew it, but I guess didn't fully understand it. Wouldn't you know I find saying the word 'vulva' to be very pleasing and easy whereas vagina is a little ear splitting, to me at least.
post #138 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by AliveMama View Post
Why is vagina "natural"?
It's natural to me In my mind vagina is the opposite of a penis. Boys and penises and girls have vaginas.

I don't think it's wrong either way, it just comes out more naturally to me.

In terms of calling breastmilk "nums" in our house, it evolved from
1. Do you want something yummy? to
2. Do you want something nummy? to
3. Do you want some nums?

My daughter is well acquainted with breastmilk, milk, breasts, nipples, nursing etc.

As someone else said, it's like kitty vs. cat. I'll say "night-night," napsky, etc because I like to play around with language. I used to say messcagisms for messages for a long time until my husband pointed out that is sounds like gizm, something I wouldn't have thought of.

Anyway, I think it's great that you say vulva. But, I really don't see why it bothers you when we say vagina in our house.
post #139 of 239
To the OP. I haven't had "disaproval" from other parents, but I've had the "awkward silence moment" if we're talking about the silly things our girls do and I say, "Yeah, I have to tell dd not to put xyz in her vagina on a daily basis" or something like that. Like the other mother is embarrassed that I dare say that word. *shrugs* Oh well.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sunflowergirll View Post
We use penis and vagina in our house. It seems natural that way. I am perfectly aware of the vulva/clitoris/urethra/perineum/labia/hymen but it seems natural to just use vagina when talking to our 2 year old. We will get into more details when appropriate.
This is what I do with my 2 yo. She's too young to break out the diagram and labels, so we use "vagina". I'm almost sure that everyone in the entire country has heard the word "vagina". So, if my daughter tells her gramma, teacher, or other adult that "johnny touched my vagina"....she will be heard. Whereas if she says "johnny touched my vulva", the teacher/whoever may scratch their head and say, "Ok. Well, tell him not to anymore. Go along and play now....."

When she's old enough I'll break out the diagram, as I'm sure the other parents will do when their child is ready to learn all the correct terms. Relax everyone. Take a deep breath. It's gonna be okay
post #140 of 239
Quote:
Originally Posted by because why not?:
I will cook this crow over the heat of your white-hot sarcasm, and eat it over there in the corner.
: This line needs to be enshrined in the MDC Hall of All-Time Best Posts.
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