Frustrated, sad and scared

[portlandmama]

Although I have not yet actively been trying to conceive, even if we were, we would not be able to naturally.

I was diagnosed with hypothalamic amenorrhea and due to insurance issues was switched to a new MD. I just got my new hormone tests back to find out that I am not making any detectable estrogen, have to prolactin and testosterone levels. I know that I am not menopausal which is good but I don't understand why my hormones have not improved...they have even dropped. I have been given a plan for hormone replacement since I am at such a high risk for all of the problems that go along with have extremely low hormones. I am also going to be scheduled for a MRI to rule out hypothalamus and pituitary issues.

I am so sad. I have had a rash of bad health things happen and now I really feel like my body is failing me. I would love to have another child but it feels like that dream is slowly slipping away. I have no sex drive, I feel terrible and I have little left to give.

I work with young children and on top of that there are five women that i work with that are currently pregnant. I hate that my joy for these other women is completely fabricated since I am jealous and sad that I cannot have another without a ton of intervention...if I can at all.

While checking into these boards, I understand that my issues likely pale in comparison but I needed to vent. I took the day off of work so that I could have a mental health day but my relaxing day was thwarted by my MDs call to tell me about all of this...and now I am freaked out.

There should be a lemon law for bum bodies.

[booja's mom]

[marinak1977]

I am so sorry you're going through all this... Hopefully you will be able to bring your hormones into order. I know that good nutrition really helps stabilize the sex hormones and stress hormones. I wish you luck with getting everything sorted out.
This is a good and safe place to come and share and vent. I hope you find support and comfort here.

[gumby74]

I'm so sorry as well. I second the nutrition information. Also, have you given any thought to accupuncture? If nothing else.....it does wonderful things for reducing stress. I wouldn't feel bad at all for not having "pure" joy for the woman you know. So many of us have felt the same way. I stopped going to babyshowers because I didn't need one more reminder of what everyone had and I didn't have. You have to protect yourself emotionally as well as physically and no one can blame you for not showing the happiness that they think you should. Truly, don't give up though. So many miracles have happened on this board. You have every reason to believe that you will have another baby.

[Whistler]

(((HUG))) We decided to adopt because I cannot medically have another pregnancy. I am totally happy about adopting but I know what you mean about other pregnant ladies. In our church group, three out of the five couples are/were pg (two just had the babies) and it has been a lot harder than I thought it would be. I want a cute bump and people to know that *I* have a baby on the way too. They forget sometimes when they talk about the babies coming because we don't have a "due date".

As far as the sex issue, I am there too. No drive, none of the "right" hormones. So I guess all I can give is the "you're not alone" hug. So sorry you have to go through it.

[crazyrunningmama]

Sorry you are going through this, it is a hard road. Take care of yourself.