best for back carry with toddler??

[PiePie]

We lost our Ergo , which now means I can justify to myself buying a new carrier. : We commute with her every day -- DH wears her on his front, and I wear her on my back. DD is 19 mos. and 22 lbs.

Criteria that matter to us:
1. Suitable/comfortable for longer carries with a toddler
2. Fits wearers of different sizes/adjustable
3. Easy to nurse in -- not so much of a concern to me now that I can't really carry her on my front for long due to her weight, but it sometimes comes up
4. Not a crazy high learning curve -- DH will be pissed
5. DD is in a walk/up/walk/up stage, so I would like for it to be easy to get on and off, whereas DH prefers to pop her out of the carrier while still wearing the carrier
6. DH would like for her to be able to face out -- this is not a must, however


What would you recommend? My instincts say Kozy vs. Ergo vs. Beco, but I will try to make this more open-ended.

[MittensKittens]

I would never use a wrap on a toddler. I would choose a mei tai or podaegi. The beco looks nice, but I have no experience with them.

[pixiepunk]

i think an SSC like an Ergo or Beco are going to be your best bet. I'm assuming your DH didn't mind using the Ergo on the front? i don't like wearing SSC's on my front, but if he's OK with it then i think that's going to be the best type of carrier for your situation. particularly the up/down/up thing, since there aren't straps to drag.

i prefer a Kozy to nurse in (wider body than a SSC so a bit more discreet) and i find it easier to swing from back to front and back again when on the go and needing to nurse. with a little practice you can do it without taking the baby out of the carrier at all. i also find a Kozy more comfy in front carries than a SSC. But for carrying an up/down heavier toddler on my back, i always reach for a SSC.

i've never owned an Ergo or a Beco, but i've heard that the new Becos have that internal harness thing that some people find really annoying with older kids, so if you're looking at a Beco you might be better off to find one of the 4th Generation ones gently used. they are quite nice looking, the Ergo is a bit plain - though your DH might prefer that. I quite like my Angelpack SSC, and have had in the past a Toddler Patapum that was very supportive.

ETA - while a woven wrap can be very supportive for a toddler, and good to nurse in, i think since you'll be commuting with it it has more of a tendency to get dirty, and it's more of a pain to take off and put on each time. if you did consider a wrap, i'd recommend something short-ish in length so you could do a simple rucksack carry with it - not a long wrap and cross-carry. but of course, depending on the size difference between you and your DH, you might not be able to use the same wrap for the same carry - i know that a wrap that would work for my DH for a ruck would leave a lot of extra length for me in the same carry.

[Adasmommy]

I can't help but recommend a wrap to EVERYONE because I sincerely feel it's the best carrier for almost everything! In your case:

1. The most supportive carrier, IMO, and great for toddlers.
2. The most adjustable and easiest to fit different sizes.
3. I can happily nurse in a MT, but the wrap is much easier and more discrete (especially if you are better endowed than I, and I imagine you are).
4. This is up to debate, but if you practice one particular way of tying it, and do that carry every day, I think it would be easy in a week. For DH, I would recommend a poppable carry that he can easily learn to tie.
5. I find the wrap easier to put on and take off frequently than a MT, because there's only two ends, instead of four! Also I wrap it around my waist when I'm not using it, and that's not so easy with the MT.
6. I'm not crazy about the facing out position--I think a hip or back carry is a much more comfortable way to give a kid a view.

I would say to get a wrap that will fit your DH for the hip cross carry, which is a poppable carry that can carry your little one on the front or hip, or even be swung around to the back. Here's a hip cross carry video:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeNRwhw8CAE but if you leave the wrap tied around your waist instead of around the baby, you can pop him in and out as often as you need to.

You will probably be able to use the same size wrap for a rucksack back carry for you, or a hip cross carry to nurse in, or possibly lots of other carries, depending on your size differential (using the word differential automatically makes you sound like a scientist ).

Conveniently, I have a video to help you learn the rucksack: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=58nFvouWcfE

Gypsymama's sizing chart is pretty good: http://www.gypsymama.com/sizing.htm . She says you can size down one yard if you only want to do shorter carries like rucksack or hip cross carry. So whichever of you is bigger, find your size and perfect wrap size on the chart, then size down a yard, and you should be good. Less wrap will make for easier getting up and down in the wrap on the go!