Can I Be An Attachment Parent and Christian? - Page 2

[E.V. Lowi]

Originally Posted by ~Boudicca~

I am not Christian, but I would think that Jesus would be a very AP kind of guy .

I agree!

Here are some good links-

http://www.gentlechristianmothers.co...discipline.php

http://www.religioustolerance.org/spanking.htm

http://www.rickross.com/reference/gfi/gfi1.html

[Bluegoat]

Originally Posted by Fay

I'm pretty sure that Mary practiced attachment parenting with her son Jesus, so AP should be OK for modern Christians.

I'm Catholic, and I've found plenty of AP support in my church.

Dr. Sears wrote a book on Christian parenting, check it out!

I've seen this on Amazon, but I've never been able to look at a copy. Is it any good?

[Fay]

Originally Posted by Bluegoat

I've seen this on Amazon, but I've never been able to look at a copy. Is it any good?

It was written as a counterpoint to Ezzo. It's exactly like the other Dr. Sears books, but with Scriptural quotes and discussions of family spirituality. I think it's a great book...my atheist DH even liked it.

[habitat]

As a disclaimer, I must make it clear that I respect and love people of all faiths. :

I have been deeply interested in theology, world religions, and in exploring my own spirituality for years and years. I love Christianity, but sometimes it hurts for me to visit with congregations that seem to have less-than peaceful approaches to community (including parenting). A while ago, I became interested in reading about the Unitarian Universalism. I have been to many of these "churches" and am truly impressed with the messages! The UUC is a merge of followers of many faiths, and is steeped in richness of Christian tradition alongside others, with a gentler take than you may sometimes find elsewhere. I am not currently a church-goer, but I do love the ideals of the UUC. When I have children, I will certainly explore with enthusiasm the option of exposing my family to this type of unity in faith. In my opinion, it's an uber ideal community to foster gentle parenting.

Check them out here!!

Unitarian Universalism is a liberal religion with Jewish-Christian roots. It has no creed. It affirms the worth of human beings, advocates freedom of belief and the search for advancing truth, and tries to provide a warm, open, supportive community for people who believe that ethical living is the supreme witness of religion.

I'm wishing you and your family a magical journey towards peace in faith!

[robertandenith]

Originally Posted by magstphil

I strongly believe AP/gentle parenting is far more Christlike.

[dulce de leche]

Like a PP said, it is because of my convictions as a Christian, not in spite of them, that I practice AP. My latest blog entry is about Christians and spanking, and I have a couple of links you might like. Blessings!

[CaraboosMama]

Originally Posted by woodchick

Oh Goodness, YES! I can't imagine being Christian and not practicing Attachment Parenting!

\.

[AlwaysByMySide]

Originally Posted by magstphil

I strongly believe AP/gentle parenting is far more Christlike.

:

[SaraLe6]

Originally Posted by anjelika

I'm Lutheran (ELCA, other branches may vary ) and my church is very attached family friendly. Took quite a bit of searching to find the right church though...good luck!

My church is very baby-wearing, breastfeeding, anti-CIO friendly. If kids are noisy in church, people just smile knowingly. I've never seen anyone even raise their voice at a child in my church, let alone spank.

[lolar2]

Originally Posted by mamabadger

Actually, I think only a very small number of Christian sects actually take this strict, harsh parenting stand. I am pretty sure the majority take no particular stand on AP or methods of day to day parenting, and its members parent in whatever way is usual in their area. But I have not tried them all, so I could be wrong.

I think that's about right.

[Ellien C]

Hasn't stopped me. I belong to the Unity Church.

[BundleFishMama]

I see the Popcak book was already recommended - I love that one! Also Breastfeeding and Catholic Motherhood: God's Plan for You and Your Baby.

And I am an AP parent mostly because I'm Catholic - I can't see any other way to parent, given my religious beliefs, and vice-versa!

[flower01]

Originally Posted by mamabadger

That is not necessarily true. I belong to possibly the most hierarchical and dogmatic church on earth, and I have only heard pro-AP parenting advice from its representatives.

Actually, I think only a very small number of Christian sects actually take this strict, harsh parenting stand. I am pretty sure the majority take no particular stand on AP or methods of day to day parenting, and its members parent in whatever way is usual in their area. But I have not tried them all, so I could be wrong.

Have to agree here. I am Catholic and as far as I know the Catholic Church hasn't come out with any dogmas about what parenting methods to use. There are many moms at my church that don't share my parenting views, but there are also many moms who I totally see as role models (because they've raised 6 kids gently), but they would have no idea what the term AP is.

So to answer the original question, I don't think you should go to a church that outspokenly promotes anti-AP methods, but most churches aren't like that anyway.

[momma-molly]

This is really a very interesting question. My parenting philospophy is constantly evolving, but so far I've been pretty much an APer all the way. With that being said, I attend a very conservative church who does believe in "spare the rod" -although it's not actively preached and taught.

In my experience, the only time I've seen a mother come under fire for her parenting style (a mother who practices AP) was because she has several extremely disobedient children. I mean, totally undisciplined, disrespectful, distruptive kids.

[papayapetunia]

I go to a Unity church and we very much believe that children are a gift and that they should be celebrated and nurtured. Cherishing our children is a part of everyday consciousness and every church service. At the end of each service, the whole Sunday school group comes out to the front of the church and we sing to them:

Child of God I love you,
You are goodness, you are light,
Child of God you are wonderful,
You are precious in my sight.

I seriously had an emotional breakdown the first time I went to church there, because it was so different from the churches I had been to growing up. One of the books recommended by our ministers is "The 7 Spiritual Laws for Parents," by Deepak Chopra, and it speaks to so much more than not spanking. I've learned so much from the book and from my church about allowing my kids to express their desires without my judgment, and about how beautiful it is to see the world through the eyes of a child. I've learned that when we are angry with a child (or anyone, really), we are not conscious. When we hurt someone or withhold love, we are not conscious.

It is a Christ-based church, but the focus is a lot different than other Christian churches. For example, we don't believe in hell after death. We believe that hell is what you live when you don't have Christ-consciousness, which doesn't mean getting saved or anything like that, and doesn't really have a lot to do with Christ the man. It could be Buddha-consciousness, Allah consciousness, whatever. It's the consciousness that's important.

[Rosehip]

Absolutely. In fact my local LLL group (VERY AP) has several devout Catholics. I'm Catholic. The church loves children, and they have a very special place. They're welcome at mass. I believe the Vatican, under Pope JPII actually issued a pro-breastfeeding statement. I don't think the concept of respecting one's parents is anti-AP. It's not being fearful of one's parents. It's respect, and isn't that what gentleness is all about?

[Ellien C]

Originally Posted by papayapetunia

I go to a Unity church and we very much believe that children are a gift and that they should be celebrated and nurtured. Cherishing our children is a part of everyday consciousness and every church service. At the end of each service, the whole Sunday school group comes out to the front of the church and we sing to them:

Child of God I love you,
You are goodness, you are light,
Child of God you are wonderful,
You are precious in my sight.

I seriously had an emotional breakdown the first time I went to church there, because it was so different from the churches I had been to growing up. One of the books recommended by our ministers is "The 7 Spiritual Laws for Parents," by Deepak Chopra, and it speaks to so much more than not spanking. I've learned so much from the book and from my church about allowing my kids to express their desires without my judgment, and about how beautiful it is to see the world through the eyes of a child. I've learned that when we are angry with a child (or anyone, really), we are not conscious. When we hurt someone or withhold love, we are not conscious.

It is a Christ-based church, but the focus is a lot different than other Christian churches. For example, we don't believe in hell after death. We believe that hell is what you live when you don't have Christ-consciousness, which doesn't mean getting saved or anything like that, and doesn't really have a lot to do with Christ the man. It could be Buddha-consciousness, Allah consciousness, whatever. It's the consciousness that's important.

Hi -I go to a Unity Church as well. I hadn't heard of the Deepak Chopra book but I will look for it.

[candipooh]

There was post on MDC a few years (?) ago where a wonderful mama wrote out a letter to her pastor. He had mentioned spanking in his lesson I believe. The letter , which she posted, was full of bible quotes. It was beautiful and well thought out and it got the pastor thinking. He was responsive.

I saved that post and posted on my myspace. But yes it was full of proof that being AP goes right along with being Christian.

[Whistler]

In our church there are many different styles, but a lot of resepct. I feel quite happy babywearing, co-sleeping, breastfeeding, unschooling... and letting my kiddos run wild after the service with the other hooligans! We looked for a long time for a church that "fit" our family, with good kids' programs and a lot of families our age where our kids could fellowship too. I am happy to say we found one, although church to me is an extension of my faith, not the center of it. My faith in Christ would be solid not matter what church we attend or even if we didn't.

[DahliaRW]

Originally Posted by momma-molly

In my experience, the only time I've seen a mother come under fire for her parenting style (a mother who practices AP) was because she has several extremely disobedient children. I mean, totally undisciplined, disrespectful, distruptive kids.

Though really, if you're not disciplining your children and teaching them how to be in charge of their own behavior and selves you are not an AP parent, you are a permissive parent. And one thing I HATE is that so many "spare the rod" type of promoters paint AP as permissive parenting (in particular Ezzo). And it is not if done right. AP does not mean you don't discipline and teach your children (as the Bible commands), but rather that you do it in different, more gentle ways WHILE making sure you meet your child's physical and emotional needs. Which, if you read through how Christ taught, seems to go right along with his style. After all, we are promised that our basic needs will be met.