I live in Michigan where our circ rate is sadly very high. I don't know very many people with intact boys. My husband is circ'ed and so is every male in his family--that I know of.
So I was just waiting for MIL to bring up the subject after my son was born. I wasn't going to go bringing it up if I didn't have to.
She said, "So I know he's not a circ baby. Did you know that you have to push it back and clean it out or he'll get poop and sores and infections, blah, blah, blah." I said, "Actually you're not supposed to push it back at all, just clean externally." She said, "Who told you that?" I said, "That's the current medical recommendation." I also mentioned that my midwife told me that, and the baby's doctor agrees with it also. She said, "For his sake, I sure hope you're right."
Anyway, she went off on some other myths about circ and also mentioned how my son "not being like other boys" is a concern. I said, "Well in Michigan the circ rate is high, but that's not the way it is worldwide. Also in the U.S. the circ rate is about 50/50. Do you really think that 50% of boys are going to be making fun of the other 50%?" I said, "Anyway I don't personally care if the circ rate was 99%, I will do what I feel is right for my kids." She said, "And I did what I felt was right for mine." I said, "Yep, that's all you can do, and now we get our shot at doing what we feel is right for ours."
She said, "You've always been one to pick the radical viewpoint." Me: "How is it radical if 80% of the world's men aren't circ'ed?"
At the end, I said, "So, now that we've discussed the whole circ/uncirc thing, do you feel confident in changing his diapers? Remember you NEVER, EVER retract his foreskin! Just clean it externally." She said, "Yes, I'd never go messing around with it."
SIGH. I'm sad that such a discussion even has to come up. I mean, really, I'm radical because I didn't do unnecessary cosmetic surgery on my newborn son's genitals? I'm still processing my sadness over the conversation. Why should I be made to feel "radical" for leaving my son the way he was born?
Maybe my MIL is trying to make herself feel okay about her choice to circ my DH and BIL?
So I was just waiting for MIL to bring up the subject after my son was born. I wasn't going to go bringing it up if I didn't have to.
She said, "So I know he's not a circ baby. Did you know that you have to push it back and clean it out or he'll get poop and sores and infections, blah, blah, blah." I said, "Actually you're not supposed to push it back at all, just clean externally." She said, "Who told you that?" I said, "That's the current medical recommendation." I also mentioned that my midwife told me that, and the baby's doctor agrees with it also. She said, "For his sake, I sure hope you're right."
Anyway, she went off on some other myths about circ and also mentioned how my son "not being like other boys" is a concern. I said, "Well in Michigan the circ rate is high, but that's not the way it is worldwide. Also in the U.S. the circ rate is about 50/50. Do you really think that 50% of boys are going to be making fun of the other 50%?" I said, "Anyway I don't personally care if the circ rate was 99%, I will do what I feel is right for my kids." She said, "And I did what I felt was right for mine." I said, "Yep, that's all you can do, and now we get our shot at doing what we feel is right for ours."
She said, "You've always been one to pick the radical viewpoint." Me: "How is it radical if 80% of the world's men aren't circ'ed?"
At the end, I said, "So, now that we've discussed the whole circ/uncirc thing, do you feel confident in changing his diapers? Remember you NEVER, EVER retract his foreskin! Just clean it externally." She said, "Yes, I'd never go messing around with it."
SIGH. I'm sad that such a discussion even has to come up. I mean, really, I'm radical because I didn't do unnecessary cosmetic surgery on my newborn son's genitals? I'm still processing my sadness over the conversation. Why should I be made to feel "radical" for leaving my son the way he was born?
Maybe my MIL is trying to make herself feel okay about her choice to circ my DH and BIL?
: So your story gives me courage.
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