atheist/agnostic ?, all religions welcome to comment!!

[futurmama8]

I think this can go here or maybe the religous studies?

As an agnostic woman with two "godkids" and this label has been bothering me. I don't want to overanalyze or anything but should they be "GODkids"? What else could they be since their mother personally decided I should be?

How do you feel about having "godkids"? I understand what this duty entails but where did the term come from? What else would you call them if you don't believe in god? Hope I am not coming off as making this more then it is but I found this interesting.

[4Blessings]

We've turned down being "Godparents" to our both our niece and nephew.

Didn't think we could fulfill the "God" parts of it. We are still in my sister's will as being the kids legal guardians, if the need arises. We love 'em and take special care of them but we didn't think we were a good fit for the religious aspect of "Godparent".

[Callimom]

I'm a fairy god mother to my best friend's son.
I love it. :

[RiverSky]

Originally Posted by Karenwith4

I'm a fairy god mother to my best friend's son.
I love it. :

Oh, that's fantastic!!! My children have been asking why they don't have godparents....I totally need to get them fairy god parents! Maybe even fairly odd parents!!

[Theoretica]

Originally Posted by futurmama8

I think this can go here or maybe the religous studies?

As an agnostic woman with two "godkids" and this label has been bothering me. I don't want to overanalyze or anything but should they be "GODkids"? What else could they be since their mother personally decided I should be?

How do you feel about having "godkids"? I understand what this duty entails but where did the term come from? What else would you call them if you don't believe in god? Hope I am not coming off as making this more then it is but I found this interesting.

Well, my understanding of being a godparent is to be a spiritualesque guide for the children as they go through their lives. I'm atheist/agnostic and I don't see a problem with it, because I don't think you have to believe in or 'have' god in order to be a spiritual support to someone.

But it's late and I don't know if I'm making sense?? Hmmm. Let me play with this in my head a bit and I'll try to explain better later/tomorrow. Too much AFD fun for me LOL

[Bluegoat]

Originally Posted by Theoretica

Well, my understanding of being a godparent is to be a spiritualesque guide for the children as they go through their lives. I'm atheist/agnostic and I don't see a problem with it, because I don't think you have to believe in or 'have' god in order to be a spiritual support to someone.

But it's late and I don't know if I'm making sense?? Hmmm. Let me play with this in my head a bit and I'll try to explain better later/tomorrow. Too much AFD fun for me LOL

That is the major answer. As well, in some sects, the godparent speaks on behalf of the child at baptism.

Being the designated guardian in case of death of the parents is really a separate thing.

[writteninkursive]

DP and I are Atheists, and we struggle with this topic. We currently can't even come up with legal guardians for our children should something happen to us because we're surrounded by either overly-religious family and friends or DP's insane parents. :
I wasn't sure what the point of the whole "godparent" title was. Is a godparent different from a legal guardian in the event of the natural parents' deaths?
It just kills me to think that my parents would probably by default get custody of the kids if we died and begin their religious brainwashing techniques! Ugggggh.

[whiddle]

I'm atheist. I have two godchildren-both are my nephews. They were christened at a Unity Christian Church and changed the verbiage of the ceremony so that we pledged to help them learn about their spirituality not necessarily a belief in god.

[TzippityDoulah]

being a god parent and being a legal guardian in the case of the parent's death are two totally different things.

God parenting is a spiritual thing. in some traditions it's more from a parental aspect - as in if I choose my son a godparent, that person would be older and wiser and help me spiritually when I need it with raising my son. In other traditions the god-parent is more of a psuedo-grandparent. and more recently being someone's god-parent seems to just be a trendy thing to do - like if I have a best friend we'd call her the godparent of my kids b/c she's my best friend. (kinda like how people honorarily call older friends of the family "aunt so and so" or "uncle so and so".)

but the legality of it... well that's a whole different thing.

[Adele_Mommy]

For Catholics, godparents speak for the infant at baptism. Traditionally, the godparents, or at least one of them, must be Catholic. As an agnostic, I could not be the godmother of a Catholic child. However, lots of other religions and non-religious people choose godparents for their children for all sorts of different reasons. And of course godparents may have lots of other traditional roles or duties for Catholics that are more culturally based. If the parents of your godchildren knew at the time that you are agnostic, then you are whatever they wanted for a godmother and I would not worry about the term at all. If you were not agnostic at the time and your beliefs have changed, I still wouldn't worry about it unless you are also named as the legal guardian for these children in the event of their parents' deaths. In that case I would make sure the children's parents are OK with them not being raised in whatever religion the parents are. If you are not the legal guardian, then no worries!

[caitlinlea]

I'm an atheist; my husband is a deist (but non-religious). He refuses to debate with me. We had a child dedication ceremony at a UU church for our son and it was beautiful. My husband and I both had godparents growing up and are still very close to them so we decided to ask our best friends, who have no children of their own, to be our son's godparents. They are both atheists as well so obviously we don't expect them to provide religious or spiritual guidance to our son. They are more like aunt and uncle, or extended family. They share our values and both enjoy being part of our son's life and have a special relationship with him.

[*Jade*]

I'm an aethiest/agnostic (it varies, daily ) and I have a god-daughter. She was baptised Catholic, and her godfather (who I don't even know) is Catholic, so her parents felt that that fulfilled the religious aspect.

For me, I think Godparent is an accepted term for someone who cares deeply about the child, who is willing to support them in whatever they do. Obviously I can't teach her about Catholicism, but if she ever asked me to help, I'd try my best. Same goes for if she asked me about Buddism, vegetarianism or ballet.

[Shantimama]

I think the term godparent has been used in place of guardian for some reason and that leads to confusion. My mother used to refer to the people who would be my guardians if she died as my godparents, but that was because she liked the sound of the term better than guardian. My mother was atheist, but thought that 'godparent' sounded nicer.

My children have godparents who stood with us at their baptisms - people whose spirituality we respected and people we wanted to invite into a special relationship with our children. We chose different people to be guardians for them in the event of our death. Each child has his/her own set of godparents, but they would all be together with the beloved people we asked to care for and raise them if we die. If that should happen, I trust that our children will have this wonderful circle of people around them to help them grieve and adjust.

I have two godchildren and I was honoured to be asked both times. both families have beliefs and spiritual practices which I will be comfortable supporting as these children grow and mature. If I had been invited into such a role where my beliefs were incompatible with the parents' I would thank them for the honour of asking me, but decline.

We are also legal guardians for the children in another family if the parents die. Responding to that was completely different. Same thing with the people we have asked to be guardians for our children. They hold very different beliefs from us, but I know them to be respectful loving people and we could think of no one who we trust more with our beloved children. Knowing that they would be respectful of the spiritual differences was good enough for us - it didn't matter so much, knowing that they would help keep the kids' relationship with their godparents strong in such a difficult time.

[beansmama]

You don't have to be "GODparents".

I think a lot of people don't realize that this is technically a catholic thing (i think??? My dad's an x-catholic and had godparents, as did all his siblings). It seems like naming "godparents" is trendy nowadays - for all religions.

A lot of people just use the term loosely, saying, "if we die - please take care of our kids"...and just calling someone a "godparent" isn't enough. It's gotta be in the will, otherwise the kids will go to family - or even the state.

If the people who asked you to be the "godparents" realize that you aren't religious, then it's doubtful they would expect you to raise their kids up the way "god" would want them to go...yanno? They probably are just using the term loosely, for lack of a better word