Bartering with Midwife, WWYD?

[jenners26]

My midwife has a payment plan that is leaving me a little unsure of what to do, so I'm hoping you guys can give me a little advice!

She has a VERY loose payment scale. Basically, you pick the amount you're going to pay her between 1800 and 3200, set up a payment plan ranging between your first prenatal appointment and the delivery, with full amount due upon delivery. She also has a "bartering" option. My husband is a web developer/designer and a network administrator, and our midwife is very interested in him building a website, designing a brochure, and doing some computer tech work for her.

Bartering would be great! Money is very tight for us with a fourth baby coming, but for some reason, I'm feeling somewhat guilty for not paying her actual cash! With the website and the tech work, my husband is probably doing around 2500 dollars worth of work for her. Is that enough? Should we pay her an amount on top of the barter? She seems VERY laid back when it comes to money, but I still feel guilty not paying with cash.

I guess I'm just looking for some reassurance that we're doing enough for her, or some input if it seems like it's not enough!

[moondiapers]

I think I'd pay her $700 so that it brings the total up to the higher amount.

[Full Heart]

I would price the competition and see what they are charging for their services and give those to your mw and then offer to pay the difference or + some in cash.

Cause most mws are not gonna be spending $2500 on a website. They will either do it themselves with one of those hosting places with one of those diy designers or have a friend do it. So you should def do some cash for her.

[AVeryGoodYear]

If your husband builds her a website, she's also going to need support for it. I'd offer a year of him acting as a webmaster/tech support type guy, and then splurge on a nice bottle of wine and maybe a gift card to a restaurant for her after the birth -- but that's it, no cash :] If she's laid back and willing to barter, then it would seem to me that she places little value in money and more value in connecting with her "clients" on a basic emotional, human level.

[jenners26]

Originally Posted by AVeryGoodYear

If your husband builds her a website, she's also going to need support for it. I'd offer a year of him acting as a webmaster/tech support type guy, and then splurge on a nice bottle of wine and maybe a gift card to a restaurant for her after the birth -- but that's it, no cash :] If she's laid back and willing to barter, then it would seem to me that she places little value in money and more value in connecting with her "clients" on a basic emotional, human level.

This is what I've sort of been trying to convince myself of...she has said MANY times, that while getting paid is nice, she's much more concerned with empowering women in their birthing experiences, which is why she has such a wide-range of billing options.

DH would be designing/building/hosting her website, designing and printing an updated brochure for her, and helping with some computer support work for her personal computer. Including the monthly support is a great idea, and so is the gift card/wine idea.

If we were paying cash, we would have picked around 2000 dollars in fees, because, budget-wise that's about all we could have afforded. I'm also seeing an OB, due to severe hyperemesis, and the perscription I'm taking is about 200 dollars a month. While I realize that isn't my midwife's problem, it would have been a huge factor in why we would have chosen to pay 2000 instead of 3000 or more.

I don't know...now I feel like I'm rambling and justifying! I just want to make sure that she's not being short-changed (which is obviously more my own hang-up than it is her's)!

Thanks for the advice so far...you're definetly giving me things to think about!

[Burnindinner]

I think that sounds reasonable. I would think that someone who set up a payment plan like this would really mean it - in other words, she really is fine with whatever works for you. That is great she is able to be so flexible!

[Talula Fairie]

Originally Posted by moondiapers

I think I'd pay her $700 so that it brings the total up to the higher amount.

:

[EnterGently]

We have done a ton of bartering in my family (I grew up with my dad bartering for everything from work on cars to a surgery for my mom!!). Both of the midwives I have used (first 2 births) have accepted bartering and we bartered the birth of my 2nd child (my dh was a painter at the time, and she needed some work done in her house).

Basically, it is a good situation for you both! It isn't like you are not paying her. Your dh is doing an amount of work that is equal money wise as what she is doing for you (though of course we know the work midwives do for moms is often priceless!). Bartering is a blessing because if she is needing or has been wanting this work done, not only is it saving her the time and effort of having to find someone she trusts to do it (or doing it herself, which I am sure she doesn't have time for) but she is not having to pay out of pocket for it . . . her payment is her service to you, which is something she believes in and enjoys doing (and vice/versa on your part). So it is a win/win all around.

I don't think you need to pay her any extra money. We often feel so grateful for the support we get from our midwives, and like I said before the work they do is often priceless in our minds. If you want to do more buy her a gift, something from the heart, or make her something (handmade items are often very well recieved and appreciated). I made my 2nd midwife a custom babycarrier (similar ones I make sell for $150) the design/fabric I used had a special meaning . . . and then gave her a couple of standard carriers that she could give to her daughters for their babies or donate etc. Stuff like that can often be worth more than money (for someone who doesn't need or isn't concerned about the money) because it is something that will be with them forever that they can always look back on and appreciate.

[jengacnm]

Originally Posted by AVeryGoodYear

If she's laid back and willing to barter, then it would seem to me that she places little value in money and more value in connecting with her "clients" on a basic emotional, human level.

As a home birth CNM who values connecting with her clients, I find this incredibly insulting. Valuing money and connection are not mutually exclusive. I can and have bartered with clients, but I need to (usually) collect half of me fee as cash, because rent for my office, supplies, my assistants, etc, requires me to pay out money.

Placing little value on money doesn't deify someone, and putting value on money for the tool that it is doesn't make someone unemotional and inhuman.

Jennifer

[fourgrtkidos]

Originally Posted by AVeryGoodYear

If your husband builds her a website, she's also going to need support for it. I'd offer a year of him acting as a webmaster/tech support type guy, and then splurge on a nice bottle of wine and maybe a gift card to a restaurant for her after the birth -- but that's it, no cash :] If she's laid back and willing to barter, then it would seem to me that she places little value in money and more value in connecting with her "clients" on a basic emotional, human level.

This sounds like a good option.

Take her at her word and don"t feel guilty. If she accepts barter, then she is good with it or she would be cash only like many Midwives I know.

Blessings for your upcoming birth.
Michelle:

[sarahwpen]

I do a lot of bartering since i own a farm and raise animals, and a lot of times they can be hard to sell for cash. just like a pp, i grew up with a dad who was always bartering for stuff too.

I always look at it this way, i want to trade up. they want to get something they have been trying hard to find that not many other people have but me. Or vise versa.

You are providing her with BOTH good sides of a barter! someone qualified to build a good website is hard to find, and the work you are doing for her is worth $700 more than the minimum that she expects to receive for her work. So she is trading up and getting an extra $700, and she is also getting something hard to find, which saves her time, money and trouble in looking for it elsewhere.

Don't feel bad if you don't give her any cash, this is a good deal for her. If she wanted to get a "website in a box" for $200, then she wouldn't be offering her services to trade for his. She knows how much her services are worth, and she knows that the quality of a real live qualified human personally designing her site is worth more than an inferior product.

YOU are getting that hard to find product at a price which you CAN afford, whereas if you had to pay cash it would rough on you right now, so you get a good deal too. Everybody wins. That is what a good barter is.

oh yeah, and on a side note,
sometimes i think that as most of us here in America are so used to being ripped off, that we thnk we are taking advantage of people when we actually DO get a good deal (think walmart, crappy quality stuff that they make obscene profits off of and the people who buy it think it is a great deal because it costs less than much higher quality alternatives)