Are there any decent guys out there? - Page 3

[Gitti]

It also depends a lot on how you present yourself.

Be classy, elegant, reserved, kind, nice and a inferior guy will get cold feet.

Be indecent, raunchy, loud, vulgar and you will pick up the type of guy that appreciates that sort of woman.

First thing to find out about a guy is whether he is gainfully employed and for how long. I do believe a person has to be able to keep a job to have self-respect. All the fancy clothes will not do that for him unless he has a low character.

Good Luck!

P.S. I just happen to come by.

[Cotton38]

I have not read all the replys to this thread, but my answer is yes. This comes from the point of view of a single father who sometimes asks that same question "Are there any decent Ladies out there".

[SamuraiEarthMama]

with respect to "how do you know a guy's not a jerk?"...

my best advice is to STAY FRIENDS with a guy as long as you can. both of my longest-term relationships were with guys i knew at least a year beforehand, one through my job and the other through a hobby.

ALL the relationships that started with a sexual element in the early stages were just that... flings with no substance.

building a friendship develops the foundations of something stronger in the long term.

another litmus test i like is, observe carefully how he treats his mother. it will tell you a lot about how he will eventually treat you.

btw, i'm married to a very decent guy, and i do know there are a LOT of 'em out there! and i can tell you that the guys i know who play hockey are not guys i'd ever be interested in for anything serious... i know there are gals out there who like that type, it's just NOT me!

k

[davidspalding]

Re: Are there any decent guys out there?

Originally posted by madmama
I seem to really dislike men alot lately. I work in a hockey rink so i am around alot of guys. I've been here for 6 years and it never really bothered me before, but since ds came along i am really annoyed by the way most men act. What i mean by that is, women bashing (verbally), fighting, temper tamtrums, and the way they talk about women like they are pieces of meat. I am even annoyed by dh's friends. I over hear thier conversations and think to myself what PIGS they are. I am sooooo worried about my ds. I don't want him to grow up to be like that. Are all men secretly like that, and only show it when they are around other men? or are there decent guys out there who respect women and don't act like babys when they lose a game?
I posted this here because i wanted a mans opinion, please help!

try leaving the hockey rink and visiting a bookstore or poetry reading. not all men are knuckle-dragging, hockey rink jerks.

[ajsdad]

Forgive me in advance for rambling. This is my first post. I’ve been reading the dad’s forum when I have a chance and stumbled on this thread tonight. I have to admit I haven’t read all the posts, some finally moved me to weigh in. Either a huge proportion of women have more bad experiences with men than good, or those with bad experiences are more likely to post. Either is sad.

Some of my best friends play hockey. The two hockey playing men I know are among the most devoted, faithful, scrupled, intelligent people I know. One is a PhD who plays guitar for his church music group. The other is a biology teacher for gifted children. Both are animals on the ice. Except for different professions, the two hockey-playing women I know can be described with the same adjectives. None of them are gay. (not that there’s anything wrong with that!)

I find it hard to believe they are exceptions when my life is filled with non-hockey players of equal character. One post likened the process of finding a good man to sifting through garbage. My experience of people has been that there are far more jewels in the world than garbage.

I agree with others. The rink is not the place to see men at their tender best. The assumption that what you see and hear rinkside is all there is to them, however, is IMHO terribly simplistic. Men are truly more complex than most would have you know. I agree with the post suggesting you be the person you want to attract, and most importantly, be a friend to who you choose to love.

BTW, my hockey playing women friends’ language at the rink would make a longshoreman blush.

Bye now, gotta go feed my tropical fish and wash my monster truck.

[toothmkr57]

Yeah there are good ones of our kind, you just have to look hard. A family member once told me you are who your friends are. It still rings true to this day!

[steff]

Amy mama

I laughed when you made the joke about them being all gay. Thought it was very funny.

steff