Happy New Year!
With the coming of the new year, I've been thinking about working on some new parenting techniques with my almost 2 year old dd.
We generally get along pretty well. Some days are awesome, where I seem to be able to read all of her needs and fulfill them; other days I pretty much can't wait till nap time and bed time, KWIM? Anyway, I'm sure you know where I am going with this. So, here are the few situations that I can use some advice or suggestions.
Throwing herself on the floor---that's my dd's favorite M.O. when she can't have something or if she doesn't like what I say. These are the frivolous tantrums that are more irritating than frustrating....i.e. she wants a lollipop for breakfast. Usually, when she just throws herself down and whines (the fake kind of whine) I'll try to offer a reasonable choice. When that doesn't work, I tell her calmly that I won't talk/play with her until she talks nicely (or calms down) and that I will be nearby if she wants a hug. Now, she immediately gets up and runs to me and asks for a hug. I kind of feel like she is doing it out of fear that I am leaving, and that is not the message that I intended with this action. I don't go far, just a few steps or in another room.
Next, what do you do when you need to leave and your toddler isn't ready to go. She threw a doozy fit when she had to leave grandma and grandpas house around the holidays and it was both embarrasing and frustrating. At the time, I knew that she was way too tired and overstimulated, so I just let it go and got her coat on, despite her cries and thrashing. But, when we are at home and we need to get out of the house, I usually try to play a game and get the coat on. If that doesn't work, I just tell her calmly that we need to go and I just put the coat/shoes on her despite her protests. But, sometimes I feel like I am just forcing the situation too much. What do you all do in situations like this?
Finally, (and this one drives me nuts!!) she has taken to running away from me in the store and as we walk out of the house. She's usually pretty good about holding my hand and we talk about how important it is. But, for example, today, we went to the store and she took off. I told her to stop but she kept running and laughing. I took off after her and grabbed her by the arm and told her (rather forcefully) that she cannot run in the store and that it isn't funny. I then picked her up and made her sit in the stroller. She did it again when we were getting into the car later that day. This time, I got down on her level and held her arms and told her very seriously that it's not funny. I then carried her to the car and told her that she had to get into the car seat. That's when she cried, but I put her in the carseat instead.
I hate feeling like I am constantly making her do what I want her to do, but I also don't want her to get in the habit of having me beg (and/or) bribe her to do/not do certain things.
I guess the bottom line is how firm do you get with your toddlers and still implement GD? THANKS!
Libby
With the coming of the new year, I've been thinking about working on some new parenting techniques with my almost 2 year old dd.
We generally get along pretty well. Some days are awesome, where I seem to be able to read all of her needs and fulfill them; other days I pretty much can't wait till nap time and bed time, KWIM? Anyway, I'm sure you know where I am going with this. So, here are the few situations that I can use some advice or suggestions.
Throwing herself on the floor---that's my dd's favorite M.O. when she can't have something or if she doesn't like what I say. These are the frivolous tantrums that are more irritating than frustrating....i.e. she wants a lollipop for breakfast. Usually, when she just throws herself down and whines (the fake kind of whine) I'll try to offer a reasonable choice. When that doesn't work, I tell her calmly that I won't talk/play with her until she talks nicely (or calms down) and that I will be nearby if she wants a hug. Now, she immediately gets up and runs to me and asks for a hug. I kind of feel like she is doing it out of fear that I am leaving, and that is not the message that I intended with this action. I don't go far, just a few steps or in another room.
Next, what do you do when you need to leave and your toddler isn't ready to go. She threw a doozy fit when she had to leave grandma and grandpas house around the holidays and it was both embarrasing and frustrating. At the time, I knew that she was way too tired and overstimulated, so I just let it go and got her coat on, despite her cries and thrashing. But, when we are at home and we need to get out of the house, I usually try to play a game and get the coat on. If that doesn't work, I just tell her calmly that we need to go and I just put the coat/shoes on her despite her protests. But, sometimes I feel like I am just forcing the situation too much. What do you all do in situations like this?
Finally, (and this one drives me nuts!!) she has taken to running away from me in the store and as we walk out of the house. She's usually pretty good about holding my hand and we talk about how important it is. But, for example, today, we went to the store and she took off. I told her to stop but she kept running and laughing. I took off after her and grabbed her by the arm and told her (rather forcefully) that she cannot run in the store and that it isn't funny. I then picked her up and made her sit in the stroller. She did it again when we were getting into the car later that day. This time, I got down on her level and held her arms and told her very seriously that it's not funny. I then carried her to the car and told her that she had to get into the car seat. That's when she cried, but I put her in the carseat instead.
I hate feeling like I am constantly making her do what I want her to do, but I also don't want her to get in the habit of having me beg (and/or) bribe her to do/not do certain things.
I guess the bottom line is how firm do you get with your toddlers and still implement GD? THANKS!
Libby
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