what can I do?--vent

[rainashine]

I am spitting mad today. My dd is 14 months and still bfing 5-7 times a day when I'm home. I work full time and pump twice a day (down from three times). She takes 6 oz (down from 12) a day at daycare. We don't co-sleep regularly for a variety of reasons so reverse cycling has not happened.

In some ways, my workplace has been wonderful. I was hired already 5 months prengant and was able to bring my baby with me when I returned to work at 7 weeks pp. I kept her with me until she was 9 months old. My boss (a 60 something man whose wife bfed all their kids) didn't seem to realize that I'd have to pump after she went to daycare and gave me a hard time about having my office door closed periodically through out the day. After I explained what was going on the first time, I thought things would be okay. Yeah, well, today was the third time it seriously came up and I can't count the number of times it comes up in "well, she's pumping so you know how that goes" kind of way.

I work in a very small government office where if I have 10 people come to see me in a week, it's been VERY busy. Most of my work is on the phone or computer. I have a private office with a door. If my phone rings while I'm pumping, I do my best to stop and answer it. If I hear someone coming up the stairs, I stop and help them. I continue working while pumping. I shift my pumping schedule around to work around the office schedule. Very rarely (like maybe three times in 5 months) has it resulted in less than instant service for an in person customer.

Today, my boss wants to know how long I'll be doing "that." I told him I don't really have a time frame. He is unhappy having my door closed at any point during the day and feels that people who come in need instant access. Apparently, it's intimidating for the door to be closed. (how much more intimidating would it be for the door not to be closed and my boobs hanging out) He sees the concessions I'm giving by stopping and helping people on my "breaks" as just part of the job. Anyway, he pushed and pushed until I finally cited the new law that went into place last summer in my state protecting my right to pump in the workplace.

In writing it down it seems much less of a big deal than it felt at the time but I know that this will continue to come up. The only mom who works here had her kids pretty much weaned at a year and thinks it's nuts that dd still nurses that much.

I don't want to wean and I'll get horrible plugged ducts and/or mastitis if I quit pumping but I'm getting incredible pressure and I'm not sure how long that law will protect me as the wording refers to "infant" without a definition.

[2lilsweetfoxes]

Infancy-(Black's Law Dictionary): the age of minority; at common law, the age of 21 years, now generally 18 years.

[spughy]

When my DD was 14 mo, I just pumped once a day, at lunchtime. Nobody expected me to be at my desk then. Would that work?

Do you have a history of mastitis? I did get mastitis when I was back at work - after Christmas break, when I went straight from nursing DD on demand to pumping once a day. That was maybe not so smart. But if you gradually move your first pumping of the day back, you can probably do it without problems.

[evermore82]

I'm lucky to have two very supportive bosses--one who is nursing/pumping for her five month old and one whose wife is a LLL leader. Hang in there.

I believe in general children are considered infants until they are 18 months old, but you could contact your local LLL to see if there are any specifications on age for your state's law, as well as for local support. I do like 2lilsweetfoxes's definition, though!

Would you be able to post a polite sign on the door, like, "Be right with you" or something, just in case there would be someone who you were unable to greet immediately? Maybe that would ease your boss' mind.

[Swan3]

Perhaps a little sign that says "Back at 11am" or "on conference call"...something like that. And perhaps something in writing to your boss explaining that you're still working while you're pumping and citing the law that protects you? Good luck!

[proudmomof4]

Good luck, momma.
I know this is energy-consuming, hang in there, you've accomplished so much!

[karika]

i worked for a while when dd1 was a year old. It was not a white collar job. I worked 7-10 hr shifts 4 nights a week , and had a 20 min break every 1.25 or 2 hours or so. I pumped on 2 (or 3 if i felt i didnt get enough) of my 20 min breaks. In the bathroom. I never had a problem this way. Sometimes I would get to talk to women about breastfeeding when they came in to use the facilities. If you do it on your formal breaks, there is nothing that can be said regardless of how old the baby is. You may be able to go down to one pump session so you can do it at lunch. I beleive it should be encouraged for wohm, but it isnt. i also believe we should just be paid $20000 a year to stay home with our children and extended bf and homeschool, we should be paid just like the school system and teachers get part of the taxes. that way more moms could stay home. it is hard to understand their perception, but to them it is like you are asking for some sort of special favor that they are not allowed themselves. your boss has probably heard talk, and feels he has to stand up on this one to help the whiners that have complained to feel everything is 'fair' and they aren't getting less than you because you are 'using' your pumping to get extra breaks (others possible perceptions). When my dd1 was about 16 mo i was able to stop pumping at work altogether. I went from 2 or 3 sessions to 1 or 2, then just one, then I brought the pump but only used it at the endish of the night if I was bursting (over a 35 day period). My dd never would take a bottle and wouldn't drink my milk warm, so she was drinking it cold, in a glass anytime I wasn't around. she stopped drinking it while i was gone, (her father was a sahd) so i quit pumping.