I think you should tell people. The more this gets talked about, the more people will question the status-quo. It's important to keep an open dialogue about this kind of stuff. Also, I worry that by insulating yourself from dissenting views, you run the risk of becoming just as close minded as those who vaccinate without thinking. Am I coming off too strong? I don't mean to. I'm just saying that discussing things, even if it's uncomfortable to do so, is good for you, your points of view and others.
For the record, We're vaccinating slow and limited. But if it weren't for mommas like those in this forum, I may have just done all of them on the CDC schedule without thinking nearly as much about it. If we get pregnant again, I'm not sure how we'll handle it. And that's a direct effect from listening to people who i disagreed with vehemently in the beginning.
I totally get the "keep it from the family" stand. But you have to argue about something with don't you? Why not this?
I don't know where to begin. Family politics can be delicate. Who wants to constantly do battle with their family!? particularly when you are still discussing it with your partner.
It is easy to bring it up on mothering as it is heavily moderated, but bringing it up on my other mommy site takes a suit of armor so heavy that I usually avoid having to put it on.
This topic is up there with religion and politics. Some people cannot discuss, but immediately call for your child's removal by CPS, wonder what idiot would want their child to die, or berate you for not searching "for a ped you can trust", then doing everything they tell you. If you are not quick on your feet, or do not express yourself well, then whether you have made a reasoned decision is called into question.
Family can make EVERY encounter about your parenting decisions. You can be made the focus of family chain mail, the topic of discussion at family dinners, cornered by any family member that is remotely connected to the medical industry, be the victim of family passive-aggressive hell "well, excuse me if I don't want my grandchild to die."
I know plenty of non-vaxers who have lost friends, their children have been kept from friends due to their vax status being public.
And no, we don't argue with the family over anything at gatherings; that's not why we are there.