Holy week and Easter eggs?

[TzippityDoulah]

this is a question for people who celebrate the religious events of Holy Week/Easter... not just peopel who celebrate Easter for fun...

How do you work with holy week adn things like Easter egg hunts?

somehow I feel differently about the Easter Bunny and Easter eggs. i think b/c the bunny seems to take the whole focus of Holy week... and the eggs are just a little side activity. but maybe I'm being hypocritical?

My kids are invited to an egg hunt Saturday and they REALLY want to go. No Easter Bunny... but I'm having a hard time deciding if I should let them. I want to, I just don't want Holy week/Easter to become about "what do I get out of it?". I hate that every celebration has to revolve around tons of presents... but I don't mind them having fun either.

the second part of my question:

what do you teach your littles about Holy Friday and Resurrection? I'm not sure. I have a 4 yr old and i know she would be so scared if i explained the crucifixion (I've held off all week b/c I'm unsure!) but I DO not want it to become about only having fun and getting candy. IS there a middle ground? something good for her age? to help her realize it's important, but not scare her and give her nightmares? My nearly 9 yr old knows a lot more, as we talk about it away from the 4 yr old... he is old enough for it not to scare him... but my 4 yr old takes things very deeply. she heard someone say once that Jesus live sin your heart and she freaked out for a week trying to figure out how he got in her heart and where exactly he was... (which is why I NEVER say things like that to kids - way too confusing!)

[Whistler]

I read the story out of their cartoon Bible so it was in accessible language for them and did not go into all the gory details. I said that Jesus died to help us. The bad things we do (sin) cause pain and Jesus took that pain when He died. Then we really focused on his coming back to life and going into Heaven again. I talked a little about asking Him to come live in our hearts and so far she seems to understand it is the Holy Spirit part that lives in us.

We do Easter eggs and stuff for fun in the same way we dress up for Halloween. I don't want religion to seem like a drag and everyone else gets to have fun. But I emphasize that the reason we're having fun and celebrating is because we're happy that Jesus rose from the dead.

I feel like I'd like to do a little more to make Easter "special". It really is the most important holiday of the year for people of our religion and it snuck up on my so fast this year it seems like we hardly do anything. We're baking some fun cookies together and having a special meal with my parents on Sunday after church. That'll have to do this year, but in the future I'd like to emphasize it a little more in our yearly cycle of "doings".

[NicaG]

We're going to dye Easter eggs on Holy Saturday, but I see it more as a craft project, not an endorsement of secular culture. We're doing Easter baskets but not making a big deal about it. Our church is having an Easter egg hunt after the service on Sunday, so we'll probably do that. I don't really care either way about the Easter Bunny. One idea: at our church in NYC, the rector has a special Good Friday service for kids and reads Runaway Bunny with some dramatic reenactment. And then he talks about how God is like the mama bunny, always seeking us when we go astray, always with us. Maybe that's a way to make the Bunny a little more spiritual in focus?

We went to the Good Friday service for families this morning. My ds is almost 4, and we've been having similar issues about discussing the Crucifixion. He's old enough to talk about it, but too many details scare him. We've had a lot of conversations about death this week. We were reading our children's Bible earlier this week, and there's a sort of drawing of Jesus on the cross--it's pretty minimalist, but ds still managed to see nails in His hands and it scared him, and he kept asking why. And why did Jesus have to die? And I'm having a hard time talking about Jesus being raised from the dead. Ds wanted to tell me a story this morning, about himself dying, and God bringing him back to life. And I had to ask him to stop, because it made me want to cry. Anyway....so this morning the priest gathered all the kids and read another children's version of the story and answered questions. And we talked about what a sad day this is. Then we did Stations of the Cross. The older youth at the church had done drawings for all the stations, and there was a prayer at each station, all very simple (prayers like, "God, help me to comfort others, even when I am hurting.") The room was dark and there were candles at each station. It was very powerful, but also very simple.

[Bluegoat]

I think some egg huts are just fun, and you can connect them to the meaning of Easter. When you start giving the kids laptops as Easter gifts, then something is out of whack.

My dd, 4, knows all of the Easter story and it doesn't seem to bother her at all, (my grandmother died recently and she asked me if God was going to raise her,) so I'm afraid I don't have any advice. Just go with your gut I suppose. I can't see that there is any value in scaring a child. What does he think about or know about death more generally? I've gone with "everybody dies but usually not until they are old" which is only partly true of course.

[Fay]

As a kid, we always did Easter eggs on Holy Saturday. The bright colors symbolize our joy with the Resurrection. Easter eggs are a very ancient tradition...in Greek culture, the eggs are always bright red to symbolize the blood of Christ, in Eastern Europe, the eggs have elaborate patterns.

As for your second question, I tell my kids, "Jesus was hurt so badly that he died. When he died, he went to open up Heaven for all of us. He woke up on Easter morning to show us the way." My autistic DS1 understands when I explain it this way...we are Catholic, so we have crucifixes and traditional icons to illustrate these concepts. DS1 is deeply devoted to Christ's Passion as a result. It's not creepy or scary to him, he understands Jesus' love on Good Friday and the joy of Easter.

[TzippityDoulah]

Fay -

I really like the way you put it! My first kid found otu slowly... but the second one it seem keeps hearing "scary things" about jesus and his crucifixion here and there. which is weird b/c we live so rurally! but anyhow she asked my husband the other day why people were so mean and "squished" Jesus. ... so she's hearing it somewhere. I wanted to better explain it but not so much as to scare her...

thanks for the advise mamas!

[nolonger]

Thanks, Fay. I think that may work for us too, depending on how old ds is when he starts asking and whether he has any previous experience with death.

i am not Christian but we do have Christian friends and I want ds to understand Resurrection Day, not expect candy and toys on Bunny Day.

[lilyka]

Red eggs play a special part in our Pascha service.

According to tradition, during a dinner with the emperor Tiberius Caesar, Mary Magdalene was speaking about Christ's Resurrection. Caesar scoffed at her, saying that a man could rise from the dead no more than the egg in her hand could turn red. Immediately, the egg turned red. Because of this, icons of Mary Magdalene sometimes depict her holding a red egg. Also, this is believed to be an explanation for dyeing eggs red at Pascha.

Mary magdeline also plays a huge role in the Pascha story since she was the first to see Christ risen and ran to tell everyone else. and then continued to tell everyone else.

Also Easter is a huge celebration for us. Sooooo much more than a service and ham dinner. Lent goes on forever, holy week is a huge deal, the Paschal service stars at 11:00 PM and ends around 2:00 then we have a big party for another couple hours that gets kicked off with passing out the red eggs. there is a game that goes along with them and since traditionally we don't eat eggs during the Lenten fast we break the fast with them. We don't eat milk chocolate either and as a general rule don't indulge just a whole lot in anything so thats not a bad thing to break the fast with either. So a big basket of eggs and chocolate and slim jims and treats and whatnot actually makes sense to us. Then we celebrate the resurrection for the rest of spring. We don't really do bunnies but egg hunts and such are common, down in the south west pinatas are a common theme at paschal celebrations. its a party, what else are we going to do?

[TzippityDoulah]

Lilyka,

I didn't know about the red egg story! I just told my husband about it. I would assume you are Orthodox?

When my husband and I grew up Easter was go to church and see a play about Jesus dying on the cross... then go home and have an easter egg hunt, a ton od candy and dinner... and then more candy. it never seemed very religious and it never even occurred to me until 2 years ago when I met and Orthodox mama and realized how much it meant to her. My husband and i have been trying to change how we remember and celebrate it slowly but surely. it's hard starting from scratch b/c I only know the "pentocostal" way. which puts a lot of emphasis on Easter dresses and hats, but very little on communion, the depth of the cross, the amazement of the Resurrection and so forth.

We were all excited to start new traditions in celebrating Easter/Holy Week this year! but now I am in prodromal labour and I can't hardly do a thing. I'm beat and tired and having a hard time getting things together. so we're keeping it simple this year. Now I have all year to plan for next year I guess

[philia]

I agree

I am with you Henny Penny. I usually don't like to decorate with bunnies but I put up a box of decorations this year and last night I put them away. I just think it takes away from my Holy Week. I am doing the egg hunts but keeping the two themes as separate as possible. I am Orthodox so it is easier because tomorrow is Palm Sunday. I am focusing on Jesus with the kids and treating the bunny day as if it were Valentine's or something. I am pretty sick of all of the non religious commercialism. My grocery store looks ridiculous with all of the Easter decor. I feel like the people who say keep the Christ in Christmas. Lets keep Christ in Easter also.
Philia

[lilyka]

I am Orthodox. Pascha for us is much bigger than Christmas. from a worship standpoint we actually change the flow of worship for many weeks after Ressurection Sunday. That is mearly the beginning of the celebratory season. I can't remember the specifics but we do not fast for at least a week, we do not bow (prostrate) for quite a while and "the sunday of bowing" (there is probably an official name for that) is the Official end to the Pascha celebration. and they light the Pascha candle and sing the Pascha hymn (this is so silly but I am so excited to sing it, its a fun perky little ditty that just make everyone happy and we will sing it about 1000 in the next month. no joke) every sunday for quite a while. Lent started back in Feb I think and during lent we do more than step up fasting and prayer but there are more services and the everything we do in church leads up to Pascha. it is the center of our entire liturgical year.

[cappuccinosmom]

The extraneous stuff: We pretty much just ignore it. It's not part of our kids existence, so when they see it, they don't connect it with Easter. I did have to explain to my oldest (6 yo) because he asked why people were putting rabbits and eggs in their yard, and he thought it was weird because bunnies have *nothing* to do with the Easter that he knows about.

The crucifixion: Our kids really haven't been affected by the story. I don't focus on it, but we do explain it to them, that Jesus died for us and then rose from the dead. We have a couple of kids Bible and we read from them and they've seen the pictures. It's been kind of matter-of-fact, explaining the death, the resurrection, and the purpose of all of that. Not that they "get it" in a deep way yet, of course.

[miss_sonja]

We do all aspects of Easter here--eggs, chocolate, Easter Bunny, Jesus's Death and Resurrection.

The timing of the current easter piggybacks on the pagan celebration of Ostara, so imho it's important to honour all aspects of it. Yes, even chocolate. Gosh, my favourite candy is Cadbury Creme Eggs.:-)

I talk with my older DD about it more than the younger--she just gets that Jesus died and was resurrected on Easter. My older DD has read the Passion story and understands more of the background.

[xekomaya]

My ds is young so I don't know about explaining the crucifixion. I'm hoping I can focus on the beginning & beautiful/happy ending until he's old enough to understand the details of the Passion. I know my mom told me when I was 2 that "Jesus died on the cross" and I cried and told her "but I wanted to meet that man" Catholics have a crucifix in nearly every room so we tend to get told the dry facts at a very early age and, I think, don't tend to think about the realities of it until we're old enough to be able to understand.

DH and I decided this week that we never want DS exposed to the Easter bunny stuff as far as we can help it and we will never entertain that idea in our house. My family does do a real egg hunt on Easter afternoon as a longstanding tradition, and kids do get small baskets of candy. We also fast for Lent so that makes sense for us.