you thoughts on waiting to go to the hospital

[shakenbake]

ok so ym first was induce HORRID EXPERIENCE! 2nd i was at the hospital for 12 hrs b4 haveing him and i was in labor friday at 3pm didnt have him till sat 11pm this time i want to wait to go till i HAVE TO i know they say the more kids you have the faster they come but im willing to wait till i can not stand it anymore i dont want to sit in the hospital for 20hrs with them checking me ever 15 dang mins and worrying me saying its not going fast enough for them its my body and i think I know whats going on last time i told the nurse i need to have a BM and she said um no thats the baby i told her hunny this sint my first rodeo i KNOW its a BM and not the baby she didnt listen and SHE had to clean it up lol she was rude and crude! and i DO not want her any where near me this time is it ok to tell them at the hospital to change my nurse if i dont like her? we had a GREAT one when when we first got there but shift change came and we got the rude one i just want this birth to be so much calmer and enjoyable! we had my mom His mom my sister her BF my dad my moms best friend and his best friend there and i wanted to scream EVERYONE OUT !!!!!!!!! but i didnt want to be rude this time it will be my and my DH and MAYBE my mom not sure yet but i dont want the whole freaking family there i told y DH they can all wait at our home and we will call them when its ok to come to the hospital am i being rude? or selfish?

[Juliacat]

I didn't leave for the hospital until I was 8 cm dilated. It's the way to go, as far as I'm concerned.

[Kirsten]

Not in your ddc; saw under new posts.

I'd wait. Worst thing is to go right in at the first sign of labor. Our first was the only of our three to be born at a hospital, and I waited 14 hours to go in. She was born six hours later, so counting commute we had 5.5 hours in the hospital. Not too bad for first baby. I was much closer to birth than six hours but the drive slowed everything down.

[Shanti_Mom]

NO, you are NOT rude for not wanting all your family to be there. This is your birth and you have the right to decide who to call and when.

And I also agree that you should maybe wait longer to get to the hospital. Maybe you can birth better (faster!) at home because you can do what you want to do with using the bathroom, getting into different positions, moving around, etc....all of which are difficult to do once you are hooked up to all the monitors and stuff.

[oakparkveggie]

You can def wait longer to get there and also refuse all the checks every 15 min. You can just say "I refuse consent for another cervical check right now."

[SunShineSally]

Originally Posted by shakenbake

i know they say the more kids you have the faster they come but?

If this is true I eighter have the home birth I want or I will be in the hospital for a week at least before my due date ds was born about an hour after my first labor pain! no water breaking no nothing! I did have major bleeding (but they never said what it was) and I still waited to go to the hospital I showered ate did my hair and makeup: cleaned a little and just watched a little tv and my mother was saying come on lets go really!

I was planning on waiting also again this time. I would rather do that than sit there for hours I am just afraid that maybe I will birth by myself (well Dp would be there!) but ds had a hard birth (for him not so much me) and that is my fear if I wait to long you know?

[shakenbake]

good ive come to the fact today I DONT CARE IF THEY GET MAD! it OUR BABY!!! heh

[Victorian patch]

the desition are absolutely personal and respectable, doesn't matter the opion of the rest of the people, here in my country your birth is only with DH beside you..... don't be worry about the situation, people who really loves you, will understand, kisses

[Cellist]

I can't imagine having all those people in the room. I think I would go batty.

And YES, you can ask for another nurse if you don't like the one you have. They may not be able to accommodate your request right away, but they should respect it as quickly as they can if they are a quality healthcare institution.

[Mom2M]

All those people would drive me nuts too! I can barely tolerate 1! It's not rude to say no.

As far as waiting...that was my intention last time because with my son he was induced and they were freaking out that it took so long and nearly had me in a c section!

However, my water broke this last time and I had zero contractions so I called. I went in and it was good that I did because in 2 days she had flipped from head down to breech. So I had a c section.
I never imagined her being breech because of the u/s only 2 days before showing her head down.

So, I don't know, I guess there is reason to go and reason to wait.

Deb

[mrizzo]

I want so badly to wait.. but it is our first, and I am afraid that DH will rush me to the hospital if I go into any labor pains.. oh well.. we'll see when the time comes.. I will do my best to discuss it with him.. I finally convinced him today not to circ if its a boy..WOO HOO!

[notjustmamie]

In my experience, you'll do best to be where you are most comfortable for the majority of your labor.

With DD, I went to the hospital with ctx 2-3 minutes apart, but otherwise no symptoms (we did Bradley and I really should have paid more attention to the "emotional signposts" they talk about). My labor completely stalled and 12 hours later they started Pitocin to get it going again. I think if I'd waited until I was further along, I would have a) had a much shorter labor overall and b) not needed any medical intervention.

[belltree]

My midwife told me to wait and do most of it at home, to avoid having to deal with possible interventions lingering from the hospital staff.

If you have a long drive and you arrive too early, you could go for a walk around the hospital, that's what my mother did.

Also, I just finished reading "Babycatcher". This is such a wonderful book with tons of birth stories, written by a midwife. Some stories made me laugh, others cry, others were soo fascinating. And the all gave me, as a first time pregnant woman, an idea of the variety of things, that I might expect, and how some women experience labor and how did others.

[jilly]

I guess I got lucky with my first . . . I went in when I had contractions 5 min apart, and they sent me away because they had four or five other women in labour at the time. The nurse literaly said, "Go walk around the mall and distract yourself, go home and have a nap . . . come back when you're not smiling anymore." I think that was great advice. When the contractions get so serious that you can't move or talk through them, then its hospital time. Before that, unless you have a long drive, stay at home. That time I was back 8 hrs later and had the baby 2 hrs after that.

With my second, I was only in labour for 3 hrs. Ironically, I was so calm when I got there that the nurse didn't think I was in serious labour and she wasn't a l&d nurse (there's only two in town) and she was kind of puttering around getting things ready and she couldn't figure out how far dialated I was and I had the baby about 45 min. later. I ended up being sort of like, "Um, I think I need to push. Is that bed ready yet?"

I think the first nurse's advice was great. When you can't move or smile during contractions anymore, unless there's some complication, its time to go to the hospital.

Also, I would hate to labour with a hundred people in the room, especially if it was taking a long time. I turn totally inward when I'm in labour, so I don't really care if anyone is there.

[shakenbake]

ya i just want this labor to be calm and go faster dang it!
22 hrs with my 2nd and 10 with my first but my first was induced! i will NOT do that again unless i ABSOLUTELY have to

[mamaprek]

With DS2 i got to the hospital 52 minutes before he was born. It worked out perfect. I was only 6 cm when I got checked after arriving. I dilated 4 cm in 45 minutes. It went really fast but it was so great - there was no time for them to bother me about pain meds or anything. I'd wait as long as possible. When my contractions were about 1 1/2 - 2 minutes apart I decided to go. I plan to do the same thing with this one. The less time you are there - the less time they have to bother you.

[charleysmama23]

I'm actually considering teaching dh to check my dilation!!! Okay, really I'm just planning to stay home until i want to push and then make a run for it. I'd seriously rather give birth in the car than be induced again, or sit in a hospital for 24 hours laboring.

[KaliShanti]

Wait as long as possible if you want a natural experience.