Staying at Grandma's

[angelamariebee]

How old were your children before you were comfortable leaving them overnight, a weekend, or longer with other family members?

I'm sure it varies from child to child, I'm just curious to hear about your personal experiences.

[Green Eyes]

My MIL and my sister could have taken care of our daughter at any time since she was born, but she will never ever be in my parents' care.

[sadean]

My oldest was 15 months old the first time we left him overnight with my ILs when DH went on our "honeymoon". He weaned that weekend and I was heart broken. We did not have him stay over night again until he was about 5 yo.

My 2nd child was between 4-5 years old, and had his older brother with him.

My youngest has not stayed overnight with them, and she is now 4 yo.

[jeanine123]

If we lived closer and they knew the grandparents better I'd be comfortable leaving my oldest (5.5 yo) with my folks overnight. Not too sure about my youngest (3yo next week). I don't think he'd be ready yet, at least not overnight.

[amandaleigh37]

DS is 2 1/2 and we've never left him overnight with anyone. I don't think he or I are ready for that yet.

[jessemoon]

My ds was just shy of two when he first spent the night with my parents. He loved it and has been spending a weekend a month with them recently. It is glorious for all involved.

My dd is 20 months and not quite ready yet...but I see the time approaching.

[Mama2Bug]

DD is 4 1/2 and has never stayed overnight with anyone. I don't think she is ready yet, for a number of reasons. She is not yet dry all night. She still ends up in my bed by morning nearly every night. She also has a very specific bedtime routine that could not be replicated at a different house.

[Hoopin' Mama]

2yo with grandma at our house. He's 4.5 now and we're not ready for him to stay at her house, for various reasons. Mostly medications and pool. He would be put in a bedroom far from theirs, and they sleep-in. I would worry about him wandering around getting into things.

[Jen_in_NH]

My son started staying overnight with my parents at about 5 months old. DH and I both work 24 hour shifts, and occasionally they overlap. My parents either come to our house and stay with him, or he goes to their house.

The first few times were really hard, but it's gotten better. He has fun, they have fun, so it's all good.

[Learning_Mum]

DS1 is almost 4yo and is just starting to feel comfortable staying at my ILs. I think he would stay with my parents except my Mum refuses to lie down with him while he goes to sleep and because of that he always wants to come home at 9pm at night (which is fine because they live two minutes up the road).

I personally would have been comfortable earlier, but he wasn't.

DS2 is only 10 months, but I definitely think he'll start having sleep overs alot younger than DS1. I think he'll be happier about it too because he will have his big brother with him. Definitely not until he's able to sleep in his own bed and sleep through the night.

ETA: Maybe 2yo for DS2

[snoopy5386]

we will leave my 3 yo for the 1st time this summer. She will be in our home with MIL and SFIL watching her.

[Whistler]

My mom lives close and is very involved in my kids' lives. DD stayed with her when she was tiny because I went on an anniversary night with Hubby (at a hotel in the same town). Both kids have stayed with her at times.

My MIL lives much farther away and is not as involved in their lives so even though I trust her, I will not leave my kids with her overnight until they are much older (not sure what age) and won't be scared. She is going to be asking pretty soon, I'm sure but I will just have to say no because I don't want my kids to be afraid.

[ani'smommy]

DD was right around 2 1/2. DS will probably be around that age, too. DD had night-weaned and my parents co-slept with her. She had a blast, and still sleeps over there every other month or so. She looooooves to go on sleep-overs. She's 4 now.

[MayBaby2007]

DD was 5 months when she started staying at my gramma's. I work 2 midnight shifts/week. My gramma is the only one I trust to keep dd over night.

Her dad could at my house---but not his current living arrangements. And I guess he's never had the desire to keep her over night. *shrugs*

[70toes]

DD1 is 5 and she spends the night with my parents every other month or so, but never longer than 1 night. She had stayed the night at my grandma's, her great grandma's, twice, but won't be doing that anymore. DS will be 3 in a couple weeks and he just stayed the night with my parents a couple weeks ago. I didn't think he was really ready, but he would get so upset when big sister would go without him. So I kept waiting for Mom to phone and say he was ready to come home. To my surprise, he stayed! My parents are very involved with my kids and see them almost daily, so it was no big deal for me.

[Norasmomma]

DD was right about 2, she stayed at my Dad and stepmom's who take care of her very often. She did well, but she had one night when she stayed with them that was a rough night where she was up for part of the night(which is sometimes her routine). Most of the time she does great at their house, she's stayed there probably close to 10x's now. She could stay at Dh parents house anytime also, I'm sure she would love it, but they live an hour away. She is supposed to stay at my mom's house this summer, but I am in debate over this because my mom seems so frazzled half the time, but our main babysitter(dad and stepmom) will be going to Coldplay with us, so they won't be able to take her. We may ask Dh's parents instead.

[Peony]

DD1 had just turned 4 when she started wanting to do sleepovers with my parents and my sister. She stays 2 nights at times, and usually is over there over other week for one night. My mom sleeps with her and lays down with her until she goes to sleep. I imagine that DD2 will start staying over sooner, but my rule is that she has to be at least 3.

[AbbieB]

DD started having "sleepovers" with my parents sometime around her 4th birthday. Around this time we moved into a small house and no longer had a guest bed so my parents started staying in a hotel less than a mile away. When they would be in town DD would sleep at the hotel with them, anywhere from 1 to 3 nights. She loved it. Last summer she went back to my parents house with them for 2 weeks, about 500 miles away. This winter she stayed with them between Thanksgiving and Christmas. She just came back from another 2 week stay.

All of the "big sleepovers" as she calls them begin and end with visits. Sometimes My parents come here and take her back, sometimes I go to their house and she stays on. My parents are very involved with my kids even though they are so far away. We talk on the phone almost daily, keep up to date with fun stuff through flickr, and see each other almost once a month.

DD cosleeps with them when she's there and everyone loves it (even though both of my parents swore they would never do that when she was a baby. ) Both of them can't wait for DS 1.5 to be old enough to stay over too.


On the other hand we have lived with in a mile of my IL's for 3 years now, 5 houses away for 1 of those years, and DD might go a whole month without contact. I don't see her ever sleeping over their house. There just is not that level of interaction or interest.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

Well, my kids were 4 and about 6 months the first time my parents stayed here for the weekend and DH and I went to an out of town wedding. They were about 4 when they started spending weekends with them at their house. Last year they spent the entire week with them on two separate occassions. The first time with one of them gone and one here, the second round when both of them were there and DH and I stayed home. My parents live about 4 hours away. They have been great about modifying their own parenting decisions to fit with ours (though sometimes I think they will burst with "if *I* were the parent...") and they accept that either or both kids may move in with them in the middle of the night and both kids still want to be cuddled to sleep.

My inlaws have never had an upsupervised overnight but that is because she refuses to not smoke and I will not allow them to sleep in my home (too smelly) nor have the kids stay there. We did stay there for 4 days once during a fire evacuation and it was awful because of the smoke.

[alegna]

I won't leave my kids overnight until they are old enough to understand what it means AND they ask and want to.

Dd knows she's welcome to stay with my parents whenever she wants- she's not ready yet.

-Angela