As a child I had some really bad swimming lesson experiences. I was pushed off the high dive, had my head pushed underwater and other non-gentle methods of teaching applied. Because of this I have not put Ruarai in swimming lessons. I didnt want her to go through that. Now that she is five and most of the kids her age are starting to swim I thought it would be good for her to take a class. She is comfortable in the water with her life vest on and can blow bubbles in the water so I thought she would be fine. I guess I was wrong. Ruarai hates putting her head under the water and in the class they are requiring she do it. She cried last class and asked to go home. I feel so bad for her! I want to let her drop the class but another part of me wonders if that is the right thing to do. I dont want to traumatize her but I want her to try too. I have told her that after she finish this session she can choose to take more lessons or not but that I want her to try through this session to see if she can overcome this fear. I wonder if I am doing the right thing in making her sit out this session.
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Swimming Lessons
post #2 of 18
4/14/09 at 11:48am
- pigpokey
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Hmmm, well there is nothing magical about swim lessons actually. Can you find a pool where she will be able to stand up in swimmable depth water (like a zero entry, or pool with a playground ... often they have sections of 2-3 foot deep water)? Then make sure she is warm enough (like with a Warm Belly wet suit if needed) and take her frequently until she gets it.
This swim teacher has done a nice "water adjustment" video showing games and songs you and your child can do together in the water, plus kids having fun swimming. You can order it through the links section of her web site.
http://www.bahamaswim.com/
This swim teacher has done a nice "water adjustment" video showing games and songs you and your child can do together in the water, plus kids having fun swimming. You can order it through the links section of her web site.
http://www.bahamaswim.com/
post #3 of 18
4/14/09 at 11:52am
- straighthaircurly
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I think you should look around for another class where she can start out just being comfortable in the water and not be expected to overcome her fear of her head underwater right away. My son has taken a lot of swimming lessons and the instructors have always encouraged the kids but never required something. If a child is unable to uncomfortable with a skill that was required to enter the class then they are moved to a lower class. If they are simply too afraid to try a new skill in the class that is expected before they move up a level, then they just stay in that class for another session.
Encourage her to practice at home in the bathtub. Kids are usually more comfortable in the shallow water of the tub so she can work on putting her head under. Also try to figure out why she is afraid. Does she get water up her nose and it hurts? Is she afraid she won't be able to get back up? If you can isolate the specific fear, then the instructor (if well trained) should be able to help figure out ways to start alleviating those fears bit by bit.
Encourage her to practice at home in the bathtub. Kids are usually more comfortable in the shallow water of the tub so she can work on putting her head under. Also try to figure out why she is afraid. Does she get water up her nose and it hurts? Is she afraid she won't be able to get back up? If you can isolate the specific fear, then the instructor (if well trained) should be able to help figure out ways to start alleviating those fears bit by bit.
post #4 of 18
4/14/09 at 11:53am
- vegemamato
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honestly, I would take her out. I have never been a swimmer and I've feared the water since I can remember.. that said, I do know how to swim, it just took a very gentle approach and a lot of practice (without instructors).
My 8 yr old took swim classes at the YMCA and loved it- had no problems. My middle daughter, however, has sensory integration disorder and will [probably] never be comforable in the water. She simply doesn not feel safe (unless I'm holding her, tightly).
It sounds like your daughter is probably in the middle- meaning that swim lessons most likely won't traumatize her but she isn't as comfortable as she should be (I don't think that anyone should ever be 'forced' to go under water). Maybe you could even schedule swim time with you, her and a teacher, or just the two of you.
It's not essential that she learn to swim now, so I would wait if that's what she wants to do..

My 8 yr old took swim classes at the YMCA and loved it- had no problems. My middle daughter, however, has sensory integration disorder and will [probably] never be comforable in the water. She simply doesn not feel safe (unless I'm holding her, tightly).
It sounds like your daughter is probably in the middle- meaning that swim lessons most likely won't traumatize her but she isn't as comfortable as she should be (I don't think that anyone should ever be 'forced' to go under water). Maybe you could even schedule swim time with you, her and a teacher, or just the two of you.
It's not essential that she learn to swim now, so I would wait if that's what she wants to do..

post #5 of 18
4/14/09 at 12:01pm
I would take her out of the lessons and just do what a PP suggested...take her to the pool frequently. My DD tried swimming lessons at 5 and hated them! I pulled her out and tried it again the following summer when she was 6 and she did great. Some kids are definitely not ready for swim lessons at 5.
- ambersrose
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honestly, I would take her out. I have never been a swimmer and I've feared the water since I can remember.. that said, I do know how to swim, it just took a very gentle approach and a lot of practice (without instructors).
My 8 yr old took swim classes at the YMCA and loved it- had no problems. My middle daughter, however, has sensory integration disorder and will [probably] never be comforable in the water. She simply doesn not feel safe (unless I'm holding her, tightly). It sounds like your daughter is probably in the middle- meaning that swim lessons most likely won't traumatize her but she isn't as comfortable as she should be (I don't think that anyone should ever be 'forced' to go under water). Maybe you could even schedule swim time with you, her and a teacher, or just the two of you. It's not essential that she learn to swim now, so I would wait if that's what she wants to do.. ![]() |
post #7 of 18
4/14/09 at 12:11pm
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My daughter also has sensory issues....ummm, I never connected the two. I feel so bad now! I am glad I posted here. Her teacher is not requiring she go underwater but it is part of the class so I will talk with him about this issue and see if she can learn the things that dont require her to go underwater since that is her only issue
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post #8 of 18
4/14/09 at 12:20pm
- Caneel
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I think you should look around for another class where she can start out just being comfortable in the water and not be expected to overcome her fear of her head underwater right away. My son has taken a lot of swimming lessons and the instructors have always encouraged the kids but never required something. If a child is unable to uncomfortable with a skill that was required to enter the class then they are moved to a lower class. If they are simply too afraid to try a new skill in the class that is expected before they move up a level, then they just stay in that class for another session.
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At first DS had no desire to get in the water. The instructor suggested he sit at the edge and when and if he wanted to join in, he could. It didn't take long for him to get very excited about the activities.
I also agreee that no instructor should be forcing any activity that scares a child. That instructor should be moving the child to a lower level class.
With DS, I never thought he would go under the water and do some of the other skills. Much to my surprise, the instructors had him head bobbing, as they called it, in a very short period of time because they knew how to make it fun for all the kids. They used toys and other props that the little kids were just so eager to play with.
I also had one of those horrible swimming lesson experiences so I get where the OP is coming from.
post #9 of 18
4/14/09 at 12:22pm
- mamadebug
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I would look for a new class, and find out the approach the teachers take before you sign her up. I think swimming is an extremely important skill, and something you don't want to turn her off to. I can see the point of seeing something through and finishing out the sessions - unless it is truly frightening to her. For us, switching to a swim school with a more gentle approach made my son look forward to his lesson. And, of course, being happy and relaxed, he learned more.
post #10 of 18
4/14/09 at 12:23pm
- Caneel
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Not to start a life vest or not debate but the two professional instructors I know (both moms of many) are against letting little kids use floation aides of any sort outside of class. (kickboards are used in class as a teaching tool)
Their experience tells them it gives a false sense of security and hinders the learning process.
Maybe the life vest being taken away from the OP's daughter is contributing to the aniexty?
Their experience tells them it gives a false sense of security and hinders the learning process.
Maybe the life vest being taken away from the OP's daughter is contributing to the aniexty?
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Not to start a life vest or not debate but the two professional instructors I know (both moms of many) are against letting little kids use floation aides of any sort outside of class. (kickboards are used in class as a teaching tool)
Their experience tells them it gives a false sense of security and hinders the learning process. Maybe the life vest being taken away from the OP's daughter is contributing to the aniexty? |
post #12 of 18
4/14/09 at 1:47pm
Just thought I would quickly weigh in on this subject.
I was a swimming instructor for many years, and encountered many variations of this theme. What I found out was that there is no "this approach will work for everyone".
I would strongly recommend that you leave your daughter in the class if she is comfortable and not having a freak out session for 45 minutes (or however long her class is), but also that you take her swimming frequently so it's not all work and no play. The program my organization offers now strongly believes that PFD's, noodles, etc won't hinder the swimming ability as you want kids in the "Learn" mode, not the "Survival" mode. I just weaned the kids off of floatation devices.
Also, for fears of putting the head underwater...does your daughter like to jump off the side of the pool? That's a good way to introduce getting your face/head wet, but it is also fun.
As an instructor I was not allowed to place the kid in a lower level 99% of the time. The parents would freak out over it, so I ended up failing those kids because there was no way they were able to do it
For the record, I didn't learn how to swim until I was 11
I was a swimming instructor for many years, and encountered many variations of this theme. What I found out was that there is no "this approach will work for everyone".
I would strongly recommend that you leave your daughter in the class if she is comfortable and not having a freak out session for 45 minutes (or however long her class is), but also that you take her swimming frequently so it's not all work and no play. The program my organization offers now strongly believes that PFD's, noodles, etc won't hinder the swimming ability as you want kids in the "Learn" mode, not the "Survival" mode. I just weaned the kids off of floatation devices.
Also, for fears of putting the head underwater...does your daughter like to jump off the side of the pool? That's a good way to introduce getting your face/head wet, but it is also fun.
As an instructor I was not allowed to place the kid in a lower level 99% of the time. The parents would freak out over it, so I ended up failing those kids because there was no way they were able to do it

For the record, I didn't learn how to swim until I was 11

post #13 of 18
4/14/09 at 1:57pm
- Whistler
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I had a very gentle swim teacher as a kid but he was adament in what he expected of us. I remember him working to get everyone to put their faces in the water and he had lots of tricks to get people to do it and not be afraid.
He had us blow bubbles, do bobs, retrieve toys off the bottom at a depth that was just deeper than the length of our arms so we had to duck under to get them, jump off, splash, etc.
If my child had sensory issues, I think I would try practicing with her more often but more gently. I wouldn't push her but I would play games that ask her to put her face in the water more and more until she is comfortable. Only then would I take her back to lessons, when she is able to be successful.
He had us blow bubbles, do bobs, retrieve toys off the bottom at a depth that was just deeper than the length of our arms so we had to duck under to get them, jump off, splash, etc.
If my child had sensory issues, I think I would try practicing with her more often but more gently. I wouldn't push her but I would play games that ask her to put her face in the water more and more until she is comfortable. Only then would I take her back to lessons, when she is able to be successful.
post #14 of 18
4/14/09 at 2:31pm
- Storm Bride
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I think you should look around for another class where she can start out just being comfortable in the water and not be expected to overcome her fear of her head underwater right away. My son has taken a lot of swimming lessons and the instructors have always encouraged the kids but never required something. If a child is unable to uncomfortable with a skill that was required to enter the class then they are moved to a lower class.
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:DD and ds2 have been taking swimming lessons intermittently since September. At the end of their third session, they were both still in level one. DD, especially, is much, much more comfortable in the water than she was, and she's come a long way in terms of floats and kicks and stuff. However, to move to the next level, she has to put her face in. They ease the kids into this...have them blow bubbles with their mouths, then with their noses, then put their whole face in. DD still won't do nose bubbles. I keep putting her back in, and when she's ready to put her face in, she can move up to level two. I'm not in a hurry. She's not in a hurry. Her instructor's not in a hurry. We just take our time, and let her progress at her own speed.
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Well we just got back from another lesson and it went very well. I spoke to the teacher before class and let him know about her sensory issues and how putting her head under the water is obviously something she is not comfortable with. I asked him be gentle (which he is already) with her and to let her go at her own pace. He seemed very understanding and the class went super. No crying or sad faces, only smiles and fun. We are going to the pool tomorrow just for fun, no lessons 

post #16 of 18
4/14/09 at 3:11pm
- Whistler
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Well we just got back from another lesson and it went very well. I spoke to the teacher before class and let him know about her sensory issues and how putting her head under the water is obviously something she is not comfortable with. I asked him be gentle (which he is already) with her and to let her go at her own pace. He seemed very understanding and the class went super. No crying or sad faces, only smiles and fun. We are going to the pool tomorrow just for fun, no lessons
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post #17 of 18
4/14/09 at 3:55pm
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Well we just got back from another lesson and it went very well. I spoke to the teacher before class and let him know about her sensory issues and how putting her head under the water is obviously something she is not comfortable with. I asked him be gentle (which he is already) with her and to let her go at her own pace. He seemed very understanding and the class went super. No crying or sad faces, only smiles and fun. We are going to the pool tomorrow just for fun, no lessons
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post #18 of 18
4/14/09 at 4:26pm
- lilyka
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If she is willing to go back and you don't mind if she gets anything from the class I would keep taking her. Assure the instructor that you don't mind how much progress is made and that you realize she may have to repeat the class several time before she gets it (my dd has taken level 2 six times now
we joke that she loves it too much to leave. and at $10 she can stay there her whole life for all I care). it may take a while but eventually with repetition she will grow comfortable enough to participate if she keeps expressing an interest. (if she loses interest though I would bail). If she is enjoying the class and the teacher takes her no seriously without pushing her then why not keep going.
we joke that she loves it too much to leave. and at $10 she can stay there her whole life for all I care). it may take a while but eventually with repetition she will grow comfortable enough to participate if she keeps expressing an interest. (if she loses interest though I would bail). If she is enjoying the class and the teacher takes her no seriously without pushing her then why not keep going.
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