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DH refuses to keep OTC and prescription drugs out of DS reach

post #1 of 67
Thread Starter 
They are sitting on the bathroom counter where DS can easily reach. The other night DS picked up the blood pressure pills and opened it. Yes, he knows how to open the caps where you have to push down and turn at the same time. I did not teach him to do that. I do not know how to get through to H. I asked him to put where DS cannot reach and he said ‘that is not acceptable’. I replied ‘it’s not acceptable if he swallows a pill’ but he does not care. Help!

(an aside but related - his mother stays with us sometimes over a weekend and takes about 20 perscription pills a day. He was obviously upset when we keep finding her dropped pills all over and claimed he was going to do something about it, but never did)
post #2 of 67
Keep the bathroom door closed? Put the medicine in a little caddy? Get different bottles?

BTW The so-called-childproof caps always open up in my purse just from jiggling around, so I don't know how child proof the can be.
post #3 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ophelia View Post
I asked him to put where DS cannot reach and he said ‘that is not acceptable’.
Huh? Is he for real? One small act of responsibility to put something away when you're done with it is too much for him? His son's life and safety is worth less than just getting to live the fraternity mess life? I can't even wrap my brain around that.
post #4 of 67
Seriously? He said it is not acceptable?
Then you will have to take responsibility for keeping your son safe. I'd put all meds in a lock box and dole the pills out like a med pass at a nursing home. But I'm b!tchy like that when it comes to my kid dying because of other people's stupidity.
post #5 of 67
Thread Starter 
I doubt he would do any of those 3 things. If we got a caddy, it would have to have a lockable cover and there's no way he's going to lock and unlock the thing all the time.
thanks, if you think of anything else pls let me know.
I'll keep thinking if anyone else has ideas too let me know.

Quote:
One small act of responsibility to put something away when you're done with it is too much for him?
I dont' get it either and it's extremely upsetting. He was right in the bedroom too, when it happened and I showed him right away (it was still in DS's hands with the open cap). I think one time he did say that he leaves them on the counter so he remembers to take them, but what is wrong with a post-it note on the mirror?

Quote:
He said it is not acceptable?
Exact words, I kid you not. This was just this past weekend on Sat. or Sunday. he saw it too, as he was right in the bedroom when DS took it and took the cap off, I called him into the bathroom and DS had it in his hands.
post #6 of 67
Why is that unacceptable to him? I just don't think you can even start to reach him on a sane level until he explains himself on that one.
post #7 of 67
Honestly, what I would do is lock up all medication in a lockbox and keep the key. When dh needed medication I would open the box, give him some, and lock it right back up when he was done. If he pitched a holy fit about it I would say "Too bad, so sad!" Act like a child, get treated like a child, IMO! But if I were in that situation I would do it right away because I would never forgive myself if I knew there was a dangerous situation and I didn't intervene to correct it and ds was injured or killed--no matter whose "fault" it was.

If and when dh changed his mind and decided to be a responsible adult about the medication, then we would find a mutually agreeable location for it.
post #8 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrawberryFields View Post
If he pitched a holy fit about it I would say "Too bad, so sad!" Act like a child, get treated like a child, IMO!
I like you

I was seriously too flabbergasted to help come up with a solution but she said it perfectly.
post #9 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by earthmama369 View Post
Why is that unacceptable to him? I just don't think you can even start to reach him on a sane level until he explains himself on that one.
I agree. I wonder if there is something on the internet- a video or article- about children dying from accidental overdose of their parents medications.
Good luck! That is an issue that needs to be fixed right away!
post #10 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by gsd1amommy View Post
Seriously? He said it is not acceptable?
Then you will have to take responsibility for keeping your son safe. I'd put all meds in a lock box and dole the pills out like a med pass at a nursing home. But I'm b!tchy like that when it comes to my kid dying because of other people's stupidity.
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrawberryFields View Post
Honestly, what I would do is lock up all medication in a lockbox and keep the key. When dh needed medication I would open the box, give him some, and lock it right back up when he was done. If he pitched a holy fit about it I would say "Too bad, so sad!" Act like a child, get treated like a child, IMO! But if I were in that situation I would do it right away because I would never forgive myself if I knew there was a dangerous situation and I didn't intervene to correct it and ds was injured or killed--no matter whose "fault" it was.

If and when dh changed his mind and decided to be a responsible adult about the medication, then we would find a mutually agreeable location for it.
You really are going to have to stand firm on doing something like the above. It is absolutely ridiculous that a grown man and father finds it unacceptable to put medication out of the reach of his child. I swear!
post #11 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ophelia View Post
I doubt he would do any of those 3 things. If we got a caddy, it would have to have a lockable cover and there's no way he's going to lock and unlock the thing all the time.
thanks, if you think of anything else pls let me know.
His problem is remembering to take them, right? What if you got him one of those weekly pill boxes where you put each day's meds in a little compartment? You could offer to fill them up for him each week and then store it on a high shelf where DS couldn't reach.

Or he could put his pills with something else he does every day. Does he make coffee each morning? Put them in that cupboard up high. He'll still see them every day that way.
post #12 of 67
Even a half of a blood pressure pill could kill a child.....

stand firm...there is no other option than to put them up. Please google the ramifications of a toddler swallowing a BP pill...show that to your H.
post #13 of 67
Something like this if he needs them to be on the bathroom counter in reach might work. Is part of the problem that he needs (in order to remember to take his meds) them visible & easy to get? What about a really high shelf in the bathroom just for the meds, or put a suction cup pocket on the wall really high?

I'd be pushing him to answer why it wasn't acceptable right away to come up with a safe solution asap. We have high shelves in our bathroom closet and keep other meds of dh in the kitchen where kids cannot yet reach. Might be worth it to get some Mr.Yuck/poison stickers and teach your son a little about them too in tandem with getting your dh in tune with reality. . . and med safety.
post #14 of 67
Thread Starter 
I found this I can send him but I do not know how much it will help...

http://www.mnpoison.org/index.asp?pageID=103

mumkimum, thanks that is great and cheap. I've also been contemplating mr. yuck stickers but you can't count on those 100% to stop ingestion so they still need to be removed from his reach.

Quote:
Is part of the problem that he needs (in order to remember to take his meds) them visible & easy to get? What about a really high shelf in the bathroom just for the meds, or put a suction cup pocket on the wall really high?
Yes, I think so. We do have a small cabinet in the bathroom that DS cannot reach the highest shelf, but he wont' put the medication there. I would be concerned about a suction cup pocket falling.
post #15 of 67
Quote:
Originally Posted by StrawberryFields View Post
Honestly, what I would do is lock up all medication in a lockbox and keep the key. When dh needed medication I would open the box, give him some, and lock it right back up when he was done. If he pitched a holy fit about it I would say "Too bad, so sad!" Act like a child, get treated like a child, IMO!
yep, this is a non-negotiable. this is a major safety hazard and you need to correct it ASAP.

and it doesn't matter what he thinks. he's being ridiculous. don't lecture him; just do something, and if he doesn't like it, explain why it is necessary. let him brainstorm a better solution if he wants.
post #16 of 67
Also...if something were to happen, his refusal to make things safe would allow the police to charge him as well as CPS to get involved.
post #17 of 67
I want to say that I understand why you H wants the meds on the counter. My DH does the same thing. He won't even put things in a drawer and he even keeps empty blister packs scattered about. The mess drives me crazy. It helps him to follow his very complicated and critical med schedule. He absolutely must stay on schedule or his life is in serious danger.

Still, DH knows that his counter time is limited. Once our little girl is mobile things will have to change. I'm not sure what we will do. Simply putting the drugs away can only be part one of the plan since we need a system to help him remember. Alarms don't work because some drugs are taken in relation to a meal so the exact times vary daily.
post #18 of 67
Buy a lockable container and put all the meds. in it, give DH one of the keys. Tell DH that having our DS die or having to get his stomach pumped is completely unacceptable. Get a separate one for your MIL and have her take her meds only in one specific room so you can keep checking the floor. Here are a few links http://www.cpsc.gov/cpscpub/prerel/prhtml06/06115.html , http://www.nsc.org/resources/issues/...en_poison.aspx , and http://www.aapcc.org/DNN/ . The last one is poison control, also the number is usually in the front of phone books.
post #19 of 67
wth? He doesnt care that his child can open medications? If he cant put them up and away I'd throw them away honestly. Insurance wont cover a refill for a few more weeks? Oh well! Too bad.
post #20 of 67
Wow, I can't believe he said it's not acceptable. I mean how in the world do you reason with a person who says that? It's not acceptable that he leaves dangerous things like that out, I mean what planet does he live on??

With a response like that I'd be pretty harsh with my reaction. Well if my DH did what yours does I'd be sorely tempted to chuck the meds out in the trash everytime I saw them laying out.

If I were you, everytime he left them out I'd take possesion of them and put it somewhere safe where DH couldn't find them. I wouldn't put it in the cabinet where he'd just put it out again, it'd force him to go looking for it and to see if he even remembered.

If he remembered to look for them, then he should be able to remember to take them and shouldn't have to leave them out.
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