This weekend, as usual, dh ds and I went down to the IL's. Well, FIL has decided that it's cute to talk baby talk to Eli. Why? Because Eli is on the verge of very understandable English. He's been babbling non stop and there are more words than ever, there's obviously a huge language explosion going on. So he hears Eli going on and on about something, occasional English thrown in with lots of English-like gibberish, and he starts saying things like "Abby-dabby dooby-oooby doo!" What did Eli learn yesterday? To say "Yabba-dabba doo" like Fred Flintstone. 
:
When dh and I asked him to stop, he said "You guys have too many rules! I feel like I'm in a straightjacket around him, and you're driving me insane! It's not like he's learning anything from this."
Um, he's 14 months old, he's learning all the time!!! Everything he sees, hears, does is a learning experience. We just want as many of those experiences as possible to be positive ones. Apparently, we're trying too hard to control his world. It wasn't a big deal when Eli was tiny, but now that he's a big walking man, more verbal every day, apparently we're supposed to forget that everything is a learning experience for him.
I'm especially worried about this attitude because we're planning to homeschool. Does a child have to be in a traditional school setting before he'll admit that the child is learning? It seems ridiculous to me, and it will make homeschooling very difficult in FIL's presence. I am so irritated by this attitude I can't even begin to explain it! He had no idea why Mike was upset about this, and when I tried to explain he acted like I was just being hypervigilant. As if!
Oh, and to top it all off, he's started holding things just out of Eli's reach and waving them at him when he doesn't want Eli in them. For example, a water glass that was left on a table. (Made of actual glass, so I didn't particularly want Eli to have it, either.) When Eli went for it, FIL picked it up and held it about 6 inches beyond his reach, waving it around like it was some fabulous toy. And he was actually surprised that Eli kept reaching for it! I had to tell him "If you don't want him to have it, you can't wave it in his face like that, you have to put it out of sight!" He just didn't get it.
He was like "Oh, I'm not teasing him, I'm not teaching him anything." 
You're doing both: you're teasing him by keeping it just out of reach and you're teaching him that when he wants a drink of water from you, you're going to hold it just out of reach and make him more upset. Great lesson.
How do you explain that regardless of whether or not you're trying to teach a small child something, they are always learning? And what's wrong with wanting to make as many of those lessons as possible positive ones?
:When dh and I asked him to stop, he said "You guys have too many rules! I feel like I'm in a straightjacket around him, and you're driving me insane! It's not like he's learning anything from this."
Um, he's 14 months old, he's learning all the time!!! Everything he sees, hears, does is a learning experience. We just want as many of those experiences as possible to be positive ones. Apparently, we're trying too hard to control his world. It wasn't a big deal when Eli was tiny, but now that he's a big walking man, more verbal every day, apparently we're supposed to forget that everything is a learning experience for him.
I'm especially worried about this attitude because we're planning to homeschool. Does a child have to be in a traditional school setting before he'll admit that the child is learning? It seems ridiculous to me, and it will make homeschooling very difficult in FIL's presence. I am so irritated by this attitude I can't even begin to explain it! He had no idea why Mike was upset about this, and when I tried to explain he acted like I was just being hypervigilant. As if!
Oh, and to top it all off, he's started holding things just out of Eli's reach and waving them at him when he doesn't want Eli in them. For example, a water glass that was left on a table. (Made of actual glass, so I didn't particularly want Eli to have it, either.) When Eli went for it, FIL picked it up and held it about 6 inches beyond his reach, waving it around like it was some fabulous toy. And he was actually surprised that Eli kept reaching for it! I had to tell him "If you don't want him to have it, you can't wave it in his face like that, you have to put it out of sight!" He just didn't get it.
He was like "Oh, I'm not teasing him, I'm not teaching him anything." You're doing both: you're teasing him by keeping it just out of reach and you're teaching him that when he wants a drink of water from you, you're going to hold it just out of reach and make him more upset. Great lesson. How do you explain that regardless of whether or not you're trying to teach a small child something, they are always learning? And what's wrong with wanting to make as many of those lessons as possible positive ones?
: 
. Just go “Here fil, so you can share your water.” Or try to distract your son with his own cup “DS, g-pa has a glass glass. It could break here is your cup do you want ice in your water? Or would you rather have some juice in your cup?”
