i haven't watched all of the show. sometimes, i just have to turn things off.
first, i love the idea of simplicity, and so i enjoyed that aspect in the introduction. sure, there were things that were "too far" for me, but i certainly honor the process.
second, what saddens me is that, as a PP mentioned, a lot of people want to live like SN's family. right now, many of my client's husbands have lost jobs. many of themare upper middle class. many of them are terrified about how they're going to make ends meet. they're in debt beyond their eye-balls, and they don't want to cut back on anything. one client was crying to me that she had to give up getting her teen daughter's nails done and just how horrible and sad that was because now her daughter won't fit in. i remember a time when gals did their own nails at that age. . .
anyway, what was really surprising to me was how hurtful/angry/mean the woman was. i can understand being unnerved or angry, but honestly hurtful? and then i realized that this is probably entirely unconscious on her part. why?
because that's how my MIL is. honestly, to her, a lot of people are "cruds." she uses this term rather broadly--it could be refering to people of color, or poverty, or a lack of sophistication (and she's no sophisticate) or anyone who is different.
no doubt, this simple family would be "cruds" in her book because of her perception of their lack of hygeine, or perhaps they don't go to church (i have no clue, but for her, that creates a "crud"), or their lack of electricity use after certain hours.
afterall, her neighbors are 'cruds' because their son plays drums, but not "real" drums, just "fake indian drums" and "not in real rhythms like music. that is, he plays a drum purchased for him at 10,000 villages that he likes to take to drum circles, and he often has drum circles in his room with his family and a couple of friends.
but you see, because in her mind, that's not 'real music' and he's not 'learning drumming from a teacher' and so on, his drumming is a mennace and annoying (granted, they share a wall and the drumming CAN get annoying at times--but he only plays during the day between 2 and 5 as to be respectful of their shared wall and noise levels)--the whole family are "cruds."
now, she uses this term as a description, and she is critical and judgemental towards everyone. afterall, once she commented on a butterfly, and please, use a judgemental tone to read this: Do you see that? do you see that butterfly just FLAPPING AROUND in the garden?
seriously, what else is a butterfly to do? i was so shocked.
but anyway, my MIL has NO CLUE that she's being rude, judgemental, or mean. she'll say to your face (as she has said to mine) "geez, you look like hell!" just because, say, the wind blew your hair out of place on your way from the car to the front door, or perhaps you spilled something on your coat that morning and didn't have another ne to bring with you.
but, if you bring up to her taht she's being mean or rude, she has no clue what you're talking about. she doesn't see it that way. she just thinks she's being helpful. she's letting you know that "you know, they do have instructors who teach drumming!" and "it would be better if you didn't wear coats with big stains on them because then you won't look like hell!" and "geez, butterfly, wouldn't life be easier if you just weren't FLAPPING AROUND all the time?"
yeah, my MIL has serious issues, but she is honestly and truly "well meaning." seriously, i wouldn't believe it myself if i actually saw her on TV--but truly, after 12 years, she honestly believes that she is sweet, loving, and seriously helpful.
or as she says "i'm just trying to be helpful, why is everyone so mean to me?"
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Though sorry to say that where i live on the Central Coast of Cali there are quite a few women who are not that far off from her!
that crunchy Mom teaches Music Together. DS1 attended Music Together classes when we lived in Brooklyn and simply loved them.
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