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Originally Posted by TiredX2  First, another 
I really understand how it's like to realize that your wonderful, smart, kind, active child just can't seem to "fit" into school.
Like I knew you would, you've already got some great advice.
How large is the school DD is going to? Do you have any idea if the "discipline" system this teacher is relying on is standard throughout the school. I really don't like the entire red, yellow, green light thing, but I have seen it done as well is it can be and IMO, this teacher is NOT doing that. |
The school, I think, has around 300+ students, I vaguely remember them discussing that when they had their Kindergarten Round-up around August or September. I am pretty sure the color system is standard for the kindergarten levels, I don't know if it is in any other grades.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 For example, you mentioned the example of all the children having their heads down and your DD jumping up. My first reaction--- why did all the children have their heads down? Was it a punishment? Is this a normal occurance? If so, why?
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When the children go back to their tables from carpet time, where they go over the weather, month, calendar, etc., the tables have to go and be seated quietly with head down. Also, when they come in from recess the tables have to sit down quietly with head down. There may be other circumstances, but that is what I observed today. It seems to be used to settle the students? I've not seen it done like this before, I am used to seeing it done as a discipline not common transition between activities.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 It sounds like DD is not getting virtually any recess. I can never understand a teacher who punishes children who obviously need MORE movement and excercise by removing their one outlet :dazed My DD's 3rd & 4th grade teacher said that removing recess is her LAST resort, because kids just need that time. And she was talking about 8-9 year olds, not 5 year olds who need it even more. My first request of the teacher would be that if your DD "needs" to stay in from recess that you are allowed to handle that at home instead.
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There are times when there is so much emphasis on work, which is very repetitive and the children have done it a million times, that it runs over into the recess time and reduces it, and then a child sits in a 5 minute or 10 minute penalty on top of that, and they have no play time.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 How is DD moving "badly" at circle time? Is she just fidgetty? Instead of having an "X" to sit on, could she sit further away so her fidgets don't bother others? Do they do a lot of seat work? Do you think DD would do better sitting on a balance ball? DS is in a 1st/2nd grade class and there are a lot of kids (including DS) who have a hard time sitting still. There is a lot of crouching, bending over, leaning back, etc... The teacher tries to minimize it, but she also tries to help the kids with the most problems have their own sucess (one sits in the back so if he ends up on his knees or crouching, at least he's not blocking others, one sits in the front because he tends to "flop" over, they are all allowed to get up to get a drink if they need to move--- and this is only for sitting for a few minutes).
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I have noticed my daughter being fidgety, crossing and uncrossing her legs, leaning to right or left, touching the wall if she is too close to it, but not repeatedly, and they sit for EVERY activity except free play/ recess inside. I know for certain they would not allow a balancing ball in class, it would cause too much chaos with the way the teacher runs the classroom now.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 What has the teacher suggested? What different things has she tried? Honestly, I'm reading the things and thinking, "that just doesn't sound *that* bad." I have a 5th grader and a 2nd grader and have seen all of the behavior you describe multiple times and the teachers just didn't consider it that big of a deal. Yes, they tried to help the child settle down. And yes, they made it clear that poking or hitting was unacceptable. But 5 year olds just aren't genereally expected to *never* interrupt or hold still (esp with no recess).
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The teacher has suggested getting a timer for her at home, so that when she's doing homework or eating, she learns to stay seated for an entire period of time. Reward/punishment from there. She has sent notes home to let me know whether she was getting yellows or greens or reds so that I could make a big deal about it at home, and that quickly stopped working. She basically advocates carrying over discipline for what happens in school back home. My daughter's teacher and the teacher assistant move clips to yellow or give warnings repeatedly for talking, moving, not being in seat, etc which only increases during "quiet time" for work.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 I am really surprised that a teacher would also consistently give yellow and reds like that without asking for counselor or principal intervention. When DS had that policy in his class yellows and reds were actually a pretty big deal. Most kids could get mostly greens and still have several "mistakes" daily. And a yellow did not necessarily result in any punishment futher than actually having the yellow.
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This bothers me to no end. I expected the teacher to try something different versus just continuing to mark my daughter on yellow, but she's done nothing else but move her from table to table or to an isolated seat. She's at a table with her classmates again now, with half rowdy and half calm students. There are 5 students to a table.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 Outside of school, how does DD release stress? Is there anyway you can have that method accomidated in school?
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My daughter goes outside daily for play for at least an hour before dinner, she can go to her room and play with her toys or play dress up, watch a movie of her choice or play a video game of her choice if she cannot go outside. For those activities at school, outside play is dependent upon weather, and watching a movie or playing video games, I don't think she could do that. Playing with toys or dress up is for free-play, but again, all of those things are disrupted with 5 or 10 minute penalties.
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Originally Posted by TiredX2 Is DD *learning* in school? Does she get engaged and challenged on a daily basis or is is just stuff she has done many times before. If she is academically bored, is there hope that will change in the future? Good luck! |
She isn't being challenged at all. She complained to me today that "I don't want to do the same thing all the time." She is certainly bored after our talk this evening and after observing her in class (please see "Update" post). It may change with 1st grade, but all of that is an unknown to me.
Thank you for responding, I appreciate your help.
Tamara
) what techniques you encourage the teacher to use in lieu of the arbitrary/punitive color cards and time outs?
