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It's Apparent You're A Parent When... - Page 3

post #41 of 155
When you find yourself pulling the blankets up over your Hubby... out of habit of recovering up your children in the middle of the night.

When you ask everyone, including your Hubby, if they're gone potty before leaving the house.

These were several years ago. My Hubby still has not let me live them down.
post #42 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by emamum View Post
you can say things like.. "no, i dont want to see your penis" "please stop wiggling your penis at me" without blinking
: This has been a frequent comment heard in our house recently!

you find yourself saying, 'no, you just peed two seconds ago, even if you pee right now, you can NOT have another jellybean!'

and, 'no, honey, the baby can't eat jellybeans, he doesn't have any teeth!'


you realise that your older ds licked diaper cream off his little brother's penis when you weren't looking! :
post #43 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
you realise that your older ds licked diaper cream off his little brother's penis when you weren't looking! :
laughup
Diaper cream! Why would anyone want to lick diaper cream?!!?!? : :
post #44 of 155
When you stick your hand into your coat pocket to fish for your keys and instead pull out a bunch of Link-A-Doos.

I also slept in both vomit AND urine last night instead of changing the sheets. 5:30 comes too early to be messing with that, just throw a towel over it...
post #45 of 155
well, he says it tastes good. . .


he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.
post #46 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by mamatoablessing View Post
...when you're not sure if the brown spot on your arm is chocolate or poop and then you lick it to find out.
I have so done this : luckily it was chocolate lol.
post #47 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
well, he says it tastes good. . .


he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.
It's too funny! I can't stop laughing - lotion and diaper cream!
post #48 of 155
* When you don't care anymore that the back seat of your car is covered in milk splatters from your child repeatedly throwing bottles/sippy cups from the carseat.

* When you find yourself listening to or singing kids' songs even when there's nobody else around.

* When you give the best parts of your dinner away to your kids
post #49 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by kirstenb View Post
You don't remember the last time you went to the bathroom with the door shut.

You exclaim "A bike!" every time you see one because DS is so infatuated with them, even when you are by yourself.
Once when out with a group of adult friends waiting on the outside patio for our table to be ready at a nicer restaurant I pointed up and said, "ooh lookie a helicopter!" when one went overhead. There were no children around to be amazed.
post #50 of 155
You know you are a parent when you plan ahead and give yourself small portions of dinner because you know the kids will leave plenty on their plates and you can finish theirs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by geiamama View Post
You know you're a parent when your hot drink is always stone cold by the time you drink it and you eat biscuits (cookies) really quietly in teh kitchen so that you don't have to share! :
Or if you hide a chocolate bar from the kids and eat it after they've gone to bed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by emamum View Post
"pooper troopee, gunna change your nappy, cos you stink of poo (pa pa poo pa pa) yes you really do (pa pa poo pa pa) its a good job i love you" (to the tune of mama mia lol)
That's too cute!
post #51 of 155
...an open box of cookies or candy lasts two months in your household because if you eat one in front of your child, he'll want one, and you don't want to argue about how he didn't eat the nutritious dinner and you did, and then when he does eat a reasonable meal he is full and doesn't think to ask for a cookie, and you have hidden the box to avoid hearing him whine about wanting some, so you never have an opportunity to eat them and forget that they exist!

...your walls are covered in signs that say things like,
"GRANDDAD AND TRAINS"
"I AM A BUNNY YOU ARE A ROBOT"
"POLICE PLEASE POLICE PLEASE FLEECE FLEECE FLEECE"
"MY SHOULDER IS HURTING"
"STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE! STRIKE!"
"FLOATING ALIEN JELLYFISH"
"THOMAS WAS WORKING IN THE QUARRY"
"STEELERS ARE WINNING"
"BARACK OBAMA IS WINNING"
because your child is learning to write and keeps asking you to spell words for him to write and wanting to hang up his signs, and of course you want to encourage him, and it's only as you write this picturing the signs that you realize the events during which he wrote those last two signs were 3 and 5 months ago respectively.

...you take down the piece of aluminum foil with a Bandaid stuck on it that was taped to the wall above your bed for several weeks after your child was "decorating", and you carefully put it aside so that if he notices its absence and throws a fit, you can show him you did NOT throw it away.

...you respond to a friend's pessimism with, "You sound like Toad."
post #52 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by jenners26 View Post
*When you find yourself watching iCarly and actually liking it long after the children are in bed. (Don't judge me...Spencer is hilarious!)
: i like iCarly more than my son does....i have to *ask* to watch it.

Lol. I watched 15 mins of SpongeBob the other day when I was home by myself before I even wondered why I was watching it.

post #53 of 155
The newest catch phrase at our house is "no no honey, we don't chew on electrical cords."
post #54 of 155
your ds walks up to you with a big grin, and a suspiciously gritty mustache and announces, "I eating SUGAR!" "I make a big mess!"
post #55 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by jenners26 View Post
*When you find yourself watching iCarly and actually liking it long after the children are in bed. (Don't judge me...Spencer is hilarious!)
I have my DVR set to record new episodes of iCarly And Spencer IS hilarious, he's the main reason I started watching in the first place!
post #56 of 155
You are trying to figure out how to explain to a three year old "why is my penis longer?"
post #57 of 155
bathing is optional, not mandatory
a wild and crazy night is staying up past 10pm
sex? what's that?
pee and spit-up are the perfect accessory to any outfit
you trade your "adult" shows for noggin/sprout, etc and know all the songs by heart
post #58 of 155

re

When you find yourself bouncing/rocking/shushing your dog or cat while holding them at the vet's.
post #59 of 155
Quote:
Originally Posted by heidirk View Post
well, he says it tastes good. . .


he likes to eat lotion in general, though. . . and I don't know why.
My cat likes to eat lotion. Maybe they should get together?
post #60 of 155
Quote:
When you realize how much time you wasted before you had your baby!
Oh, yes. Goodness, yes. The worst part is, I was a stay-at-home non-mother for four months before I had the baby... I had no excuse for not doing, like, everything under the sun. If only I could go back in time and give myself a kick in the pants...

And on a related note: you know you're a parent when you seriously consider polyphasic sleep in an effort to get more hours out of the day.
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