Lazy mom - Need motivation - Can't break this unproductive cycle w/ my son - Page 2

[riverscout]

Originally Posted by limabean

I can so relate. For me it happened once the new baby was born. I was a great mother to one child (if I do say so myself!), but I'm a pretty lazy mom now that I have two.

I'm pretty introverted, and I was so used to having a couple of hours to myself during the day either during DS's nap or while he was at preschool 2 days a week, and now that he doesn't nap and DD's naps don't always coincide with his preschool, I'm realizing how much I relied on having that time to recharge.

So now lots of times during DD's nap I just want to zone out online while DS zones out in front of the TV. I don't like it, but I'm having a really hard time giving it up. I feel bad, because that's time I could be doing a special one-on-one thing with DS, but instead I selfishly take the time for myself.

And then when DD is awake, we can't do certain things (build intricate projects, play with anything with small pieces) because she'd destroy it or it's not safe for her. I can't even read to him from a long chapter book because DD will get bored and come over and mess up the pages. It's so hard to integrate her into our days! And I don't want DS to always have to just do "baby" stuff.

Like you, we go out regularly and do great while we're out, it's just when we're home that we struggle. But I want to rein in the outings, because I'm spending too much money (and eating too much junk)! I try to do the park or library as much as possible, but inevitably we buy something while we're out.

Ugh, anyway, I guess I don't have any advice, but I sure can commiserate.

I was reading this post and wondering if I got up in the middle of the night and posted in my sleep or something . Really, I could have practically written your post except my oldest isn't even in preschool. We had a really nice routine around here before my son was born and everyone's needs were met pretty easily. But my goodness having a second has really turned things upside down. I'm getting some good ideas and inspiration from this thread though to try and turn things around.

[J2]

Riverscout - our oldest chldiren are the same age...3years old. My DS is 3, so I call him a preschooler now as in preschool age (he's certainly not just a toddler anymore). But he isn't in preschool yet. (Well, and won't really be because I'm going to homeschool in the future.)

I just need to turn the tv off, walk away from the computer, and get DS engaged in something. My husband wakes up with DS as he is getting ready for work though and turns the tv on for him. So sometimes DS doesn't want to turn the tv off. We need to work on that. Might mean me waking up earlier to intercept the start of turning on tv. Don't really want to do that though! I like sleeping with the baby until DH goes of to work.

Walking away from the computer now....

[zeldamomma]

Originally Posted by J2

I definitely understand that 3 year olds don't need schooling. I wan tot homeschool in the future. And so far my track record doesn't look so great for being able to think I might have the motivation and productivity to homeschool in the future. But of course, at that point my son will be older anyway and we will be in completely new stages of life.

Exactly. When my oldest was 3, I dabbled in homeschooling with a very structured program that was completely wrong for our family, and came away with the idea that I could never ever homeschool. Now she's 8, and homeschooling is going really well for both her and her little sister.

You are in a challenging stage, and I would encourage you not to draw any large conclusions about what's possible in the future from how things are going right now.

Not only do 3 year olds need very little formal schooling (though as a PP mentioned this doesn't mean you should ignore them), formal schooling is often age-inappropriate, and so it's really difficult to foist on them. So even if nothing else changes, homeschooling will be easier later.

ZM

[theretohere]

If I was having problems and upset about media use, I think I'd move the computer to an inconvienient place and unplug the TV. our summers are short, though, and we take full advantage so that colors my views.

[an_aurora]

Oh gosh I NEED this thread! My kids watch way, way, way too much tv. It's on all day . They don't watch it all day, but it's on. They have a toy room downstairs and they played down there for a couple of hours this morning. Our problem is that I work full time and I'm in school full time--the past few days I have been working like mad on homework, as I have two huge assignments due this week (but it's finals this week--I am done on Tuesday!!!!!!!!). So I sat on the computer and the kids played or watched tv. We did clean the house together but that's pretty much it. DD is napping on my lap now and then we will get out to the park.

I was actually proud of getting stuff accomplished today, since I did laundry and cleaned the house and got alot of homework done .

Now that the weather is getting nicer we are at the park as much as we can. We were there for 2-3 hours every day it was sunny, but then it got colder and rainy again. The other day we went to the library and got a card and checked out books. I got the book "Play Together Learn Together" and I'll try to do some stuff out of there. My problem is that I'm not creative at all and I have no idea what to do with them! The kids are all excited about planing veggies, so we need to get some soil so we can start those inside. My goal as soon as school is over is to get them off tv completely. I am just at a loss as to projects to do with them. They love making cookies, but they fight over everything so it's so stressful . They love playdough and we are all out right now, so maybe we can make a batch together (but I need to get food coloring first...).

I need motivation and ideas, and this thread is perfect :

[Limabean1975]

Originally Posted by an_aurora

. They love playdough and we are all out right now, so maybe we can make a batch together (but I need to get food coloring first...).

If you have any packets of jello mix in your cupboard, you can colour playdough with that! Google "jello playdough".

[theretohere]

Originally Posted by Limabean1975

If you have any packets of jello mix in your cupboard, you can colour playdough with that! Google "jello playdough".

Oooh, or Kool-Aid.

[transformed]

Originally Posted by theretohere

Oooh, or Kool-Aid.

Or you can just say NO to artificial dye (which makes my kids insane) and use curry or cinnamon.

[Limabean1975]

Originally Posted by transformed

Or you can just say NO to artificial dye (which makes my kids insane) and use curry or cinnamon.

Even just to play with? Wow! I avoid it for eating, but playing with the jello playdough seems okay.