Normal behavior for a 3.5 yr old?

[aris99]

I know there's a wide spectrum but if you have or have had a 3.5 yo...what is their behavior like throughout the day? Are they still in the terrible 2's? Do they like to be w/you or w/their siblings? Are they always in a state of frenzy (overstimulation) often resulting in hitting or throwing?

My 3.5 yr old is the youngest of 3. My older kids, 5 and almost 8 are homeschooled. We are together much of the day. We don't see much of other people other than at the playground. I thought my LO just might need some more time alone w/me but when I offer this it doesn't seem to quieten or calm her down. She'd rather be with her brother and sister. Today I put her in her crib and after about a minute of saying she wanted to get out she started playing quietly w/her dolls. I had put her in there because she'd hit her brother on the head. I've always figured she needed some quiet time but she seems unable to take it for herself...it has to be imposed by me

Does anyone else have this problem? I've read many threads here about naps and my guess is that my dd would really do well w/a short nap in the afternoon but she would never calm down long enough for this.

Any insight? I'm just wondering how "typical" she is?

[mama_mojo]

DD2 just turned 4; DS is 9 and DD1 is 7. We homeschool, and our situation sounds pretty similar to yours.

The behavior you describe sounds normal to me, BUT when DD2 is acting that way, I realize I've let her bedtime slip too late again. Right now, she sleeps from 5:30 or 6:00 pm until 6:00 am. She can easily and happily stay up until 8:00 which is why I am apt to slip. But, if she does this more than once a week, she turns into an impulsive mess. She has not napped since she was two.

Also, she NEEDS quiet time. For about 1 hour each day, she plays by herself in her room. I have to enforce this; she would not do it on her own most days. If she does not have quiet time, she gets overwhelmed by even minor things throughout the afternoon. She gets hellaciously silly and mercurial.

All of that to say- she sounds normal; maybe she needs more sleep or has some other need that could be met that might help even out a few bumps.

[aris99]

mama mojo: Thank-you! I think you hit the nail on the head! More sleep is needed. My 3 yr old is going to bed at 7:30-8 and waking up at about 7am. Now I know that may seem sufficient but she only just recently gave up naps....only a couple of months ago in fact and I see here eyes almost closing by 6pm on most days...getting her to bed at 6 and keeping everyone else quiet...that may be a nightmare ! AND we've got to introduce quiet time.

Thanks again for your input!

[amis2girls]

You two must be my invisible sisters. This is exactly what's happening here. :0

[pixilixi]

OK, so ds has only just turned 3, and doesn't have any siblings, but he can be very much like your dd, and yes, it is much worse when he's gone to bed later or gotten up earlier. He tends to "trash" the house, just throwing stuff everywhere, pulling things out of drawers without purpose etc.

He hasn't napped regularly for some months now (has one maybe once a week). However, "quiet time" doesn't happen unless it's with me - ie we sit on the couch and read books for an hour. He won't stay apart from me for very long (ie in the bedroom). Sometimes just a long nursing session will do it. But... I don't have older kids to deal with at these times, so I can relax too and just do it.

I look forward to a time when he can last throughout the day consistently.

[mazajo]

Originally Posted by pixilixi

He tends to "trash" the house, just throwing stuff everywhere, pulling things out of drawers without purpose etc.

That's exactly what my DS does! He hits a little bit, but mostly it's just this Tazmanian devil destruction. He's 3 years 7 months. Now that I think about it, I think I do see a connection to sleep. He typically sleeps from about 9:30 pm to 7 or 7:30 am, but he still takes about a 3 hour nap every day. Sometimes he'll just go and start happily playing by himself in his room, but there are plenty of days I have to push it.