Babywearing for Nanny

[habitat]

I'm a nanny who just took a full-time job and I start in a few weeks. : There's 2 gorgeous children: a 10-month old and a 4 year-old. I'd love to wear the baby when I'm caring for both of them or in lieu of a stroller when going for walks, doing errands, etc. But I'm wondering how I should bring that up to Mom? Should I just go for it? One of the the big reasons I took this job is because mom's very AP, into gentle discipline, doesn't yell, and I love the way she interacts so gently and responsively to both her children. I'm not quite sure if she wears her youngest herself, but I know it would be easier and more pleasurable for me than strolling. As a parent, would you feel uncomfortable if your childcare provider brought this up to you? Would it make you anxious if she/he was wearing your little one in your absence? Is that kind of closeness reserved for parents only? I tend to think that children deserve bonded caretakers (especially for full-time), but of course, I'm also uber sensitive to the mother's preference on the subject.

Where would you stand as a parent? Any tips for bringing it up to her gently?

Thanks!

[MilkbarMom]

As a former daycare provider, I have always worn the children in my care. It is just how "I" do things. I have never had a mom have a problem with it, after all the little one is being cared for.

[prescottchels]

I'm not a mama yet, but I know I will be encouraging any caregivers my children have to babywear.
I was a nanny for years for several different families and wore all the littles I took care of and I don't think I ever asked. I just did it, and it was never an issue. It makes me wonder now what the parents thought about it. I think most, if not all really appreciated how closely bonded I was with their children. I was part of the family and still am, even now, years later for a few. I used to hang out w/some SAHM's when I was a nanny cuz all the children were friends and they thought me as a nanny babywearing was awesome.
I say go for it!!
Cheers,
Chelsie

[Magelet]

thanks. I'm trying to get a position as a nanny right now, and I definitely would prefer to wear the kids. My goodness, if its a family with more than one child, I certainly can't imagine not, when we go out, but in general, I think its easier and better for baby and caretaker. Unless the parents had a big problem with it. But I can't imagine why they would.

to the nannies who did babywear, did you have your own babywearing stuff? I suppose if the family didn't babywear, but was ok with you doing so, you'd have to get your own. well, I suppose a ring sling or spoc would be affordable to start with, or getting something used. Oh dear, and excuse to start accumulating stuff for babies before I have them... not a good thing in a small space. lol

[habitat]

Thanks for the support, ladies! It's so nice to hear from other nannies and future-mamas who are already giving this so much thought in their childcare work.

MilkbarMom: Sounds like your babywearing worked out well. As a personal nanny, I hope it won't be too much harder to mesh my personal "style" with the parents' than it was for you as a daycare provider.

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Chelsea: So glad to hear it worked so well for you and the kids! Like you, I am definitely invested in creating and maintaining a great, positive bond with the children that I care for. I was formally a nanny for an older child whom I absolutely adored, and I'm so excited to have the opportunity to work with a child of babywearing age. From your descriptions of the relationships you have with families you've worked for, it sounds like you were a phenomenal nanny and will be equally lovely (and already very experienced) Mama.

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Magelet: Sending you happy luck in your search for a position with a great family. It sometimes takes work to find the right fit, but it's worth it! If I do wear the baby at my new position, I hope to make a sling or two of my own. That way, even if Mama does have one for home use, I can keep at least one of mine with me in the car in case I have to go straight from my home to pick up the Little One(s) elsewhere. It'll be nice to have a few of my own things. And I can take it to my next position or save it for the arrival of my own Little Loves in the distant future. I too have to keep an eye on the baby gear collection to make sure it doesn't get out of hand.

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so far, sounds like it's doable! I'm in love with my day job!

Any more Mamas want to donate $.02?

[dziwozony]

i used to wear young toddlers in slings (hip-carry) while i was nannying. the parents were happy about it! it was great practice for the kids i have now.

[ASusan]

Our friends had a Korean sitter. She wore the baby all the time. She just wrapped a small blanket around her back and tied it in the front.

[maymorales]

um..please come work with us!
I'd be thrilled if our caregiver brought it up, especially that we are very AP. I think it'd be reasonable to ask the family to invest in a good carrier or two because the parents can use it too.
So loving the nannies on this thread!

[habitat]

Originally Posted by maymorales

um..please come work with us!
I'd be thrilled if our caregiver brought it up, especially that we are very AP. I think it'd be reasonable to ask the family to invest in a good carrier or two because the parents can use it too.
So loving the nannies on this thread!

Thanks, maymorales! I, for one, would be pleased to get a call from a parent like you in the case that you ever find yourself stranded without childcare.

[maymorales]

Originally Posted by habitat

Thanks, maymorales! I, for one, would be pleased to get a call from a parent like you in the case that you ever find yourself stranded without childcare.

I'm saving this thread, hon.

[bremen]

i wear the 11 month old that i nanny for.
they had a moby and a ringsling, but he is really too big for the moby, and the ring sling is not too comfortable for me.
i bought my own babyhawk, so i can keep it for future littles, and my firneds and relatives kids.
i love my babyhawk, and it really changed my life.

i never really asked the parents about it, because they showed me the 2 carraers they had.

2 summers ago, i was a nanny in france, and the paretns left me in a hotel for the day with 1 yr old twins and only a sinlge stroller. i rigged up my own sling from a bed sheet, and used that all day.
the parents thought it was great!

[maymorales]

from a bed sheet! wow!

[bremen]

Originally Posted by maymorales

from a bed sheet! wow!

i had no choice! i had to get both babies downstairs to eat, and needed to push one baby and carry the other. i could not manage otherwise!
i just folded the sheet in half, and tied it over 1 shoulder. it worked just like a ringsling.
that was actually the first time i had ever worn a baby. my DIY sheet sling.
it worked surprisingly well.

[prescottchels]

This thread is so fun! Wheee!
Magelet-I was gifted a ring sling that one of my mama friends was done with and I used it tons and still have it tucked away for the arrival of my own littles : I wish I had known about/done more research about babywearing when I was a nanny, especially in regard to newborns. Years later a friend of mine was using a moby wrap or something similar and she could wear her babe all day and not have a sore back which I often suffered with using the ring sling all the time, but I was dedicated so I just did it. Planning to acquire a moby or 2 before my LO arrives.

Habitat-Thank you for the lovely compliment. I can hardly wait to be a mama. It feels like I've heard for eons people tell me that I'll be a great mama... Planning to get pregnant this summer. I'll finally get to put all that practice into use :

Chelsie

[prescottchels]

Originally Posted by bremen

2 summers ago, i was a nanny in france, and the paretns left me in a hotel for the day with 1 yr old twins and only a sinlge stroller. i rigged up my own sling from a bed sheet, and used that all day.
the parents thought it was great!

LOVE it!! Way to get creative! That rocks!!

fwiw to anyone... I've also heard great things about ergos and am thinking about getting one of those for when babe outgrows the moby.

Chelsie

[Magelet]

How did all you nannies without kids learn to babywear?

I mean, it seems like maybe doing it the first time with someone else's kid isn't the coolest, you know? I mean, I've practiced the carries I can using scarves and fabric pieces around the house, and dolls or stuffies : but I don't want to be "experimenting" and learning on someone else's kid, you know? I'm also working towards becoming a pp doula and cbe, and would really love to become good enough at it that I can help my clients with problems, and give them confidence to help them get started babywearing if they want. thats a ways down the road but anyways.

sorry if I hijacked the thread.

[prescottchels]

I guess I just got a few tips from my sling using friends and just kept messing w/the sling and the babe til we were both comfy. After a few times putting on the sling and plopping baby in/out of it became automatic. I wasn't doing any special carries either though (I used hip, cradle and facing out-which is probably the trickiest out of those and never a mishap) so I don't think I ever worried about dumping somebody else's kid out on their head, ya know? lol
I would think it really makes a difference when you've got the actual weight of a child in those carries to really get a feel for them and be able to make the adjustments that are needed. I guess it'd be good practice to use dolls and stuffies if you're doing back carries or using a wrap since an actual baby most likely wouldn't enjoy all the fussing that comes w/practicing those....
Good Luck!!
Chelsie

[InstinctiveMom]

I was a nanny to twins before my oldest was born and I wore one or the other of them all the time, it seems. The parents had a Baby Bjorn (keep in mind this was nearly 10 years ago) so that's what I used. I feel silly saying this now, but I hated the way slings "looked" - all earth-mama and stuff, lol. Little did I know then....
It wasn't until my first was born that I got all into slings, wraps and other carriers.

As far as "practicing", as long as you're not doing anything crazy, I wouldn't look at learning babywearing on kids that aren't your any differently than you would any other aspect of childcare. I didn't think it was possible to love children any more than the ones I nannied for until my own children were born.

I used a lot of different approaches and techniques with the kids I nannied for before I had mine and a lot of what I did with my own kids came from "experimentation" with the kids I nannied for. They weren't guinea pigs any more than my first 2 were compared to the baby I carry now It's just part of the process!

FWIW, I think it's awesome that the OP is considering wearing the baby! If I were looking for a nanny, that is definitely one of the things I would be wanting - someone who was willing to provide that kind of continuity of contact with my babe

[habitat]

Originally Posted by InstinctiveMom

FWIW, I think it's awesome that the OP is considering wearing the baby! If I were looking for a nanny, that is definitely one of the things I would be wanting - someone who was willing to provide that kind of continuity of contact with my babe

Thanks for your support, InstinctiveMom!

[AislinCarys]

I was a nanny before DD was born. I had always used push chairs, but at one point I had two toddlers (and it is very hilly where we live). I hated the twin pram, so I started using a hiking baby backpack that one of the families owned. It hurt my back, but was lots easier than the twin pram (I don't drive, so I walk a lot, and I put one of them in the single push chair). And I trained the older of the boys to be an independent walker quite early. Then a while later one of the families moved away, and we found another family to share with. The little boy was 11 months old, HUGE, and cried in my arms for 8 hours the first day. Over the weekend I researched carriers and slings, bought 5 metres of fabric, made myself a wrap sling and learnt how to tie it.

I don't think I asked his mother before trying him in it on the Monday. But I certainly told her how great it was at the end of the day - he had hardly cried all day, he'd had a sleep, I had been able to play with the 3-year-old, and my back wasn't killing me!!!! I thought it was wonderful! and his mum, although not at all AP, was happy that I was happy and he was happy!

I found slings so much easier to use than backpacks or push chairs. So that's how I started out, for practical reasons, rather than AP reasons.

All the parents I've worked for (although not particularly AP at all), have wanted me to bond with their child, I mean, the main reason they've chosen to have a nanny rather than a child care centre is that they believe that a close relationship with one caregiver is vital in the early years. (The mother of the then 3-year-old, whom I worked for for over 2 years, apparently said, when her earlier nanny was leaving, and had assured her she would stay until they found him a great nanny "I don't want a great nanny, I want someone who loves him" : )