post #1 of 29
4/28/09 at 11:54pm
I was just skimming this thread earlier http://www.mothering.com/discussions...236&highlight=
A couple posts down, there are websites you can rate your cleanliness level.
I've been working with CPS since dd was a newborn. A very nice, friendly, helpful situation. (I had major depression throughout pregnancy and expressed major depression at the hospital with dd and a nurse called for a welfare check). My social worker is God send. She's helped me get financial assistance when I needed it, food stamps. She got me into a therapy, all paid for by the state. A wonderful woman.
She's been coming to my house 1-2 times/month for 2 years. When she first started coming, the house was a wreck--NB baby stuff everywhere (from the shower), a hot house with box fans blowing dog hair all over everything, a trashed living room carpet with dog hair everywhere. The carpet was a cheap burbur that was falling appart. (Everytime I tried to vacuum, strings would come up and break my vacuum. I rent). I've had ooodles of dishes in the sink, clutter everywhere, etc. It was never a danger to health--but she has def seen my house at it's worst. (I'm happy to say I've dramatically changed my ways and have gotten into a great routine and have learned how to keep the house tidy every day ).
But she never once scolded me for a dirty house. She'd mention safety hazards and suggested I take care of it, but never marked against me for a dirty house. (Though I'm sure she would if it was really appauling--feces or whatever).
CPS can be scary. They can also be very helpful to some people. She was a God send. I'm honestly going to miss her when she stops coming to see me on a regular basis.
I am a LONG time lurker here, and this thread really caught my eye.
Back in February, my husband and I were accused of abusing our 3 year old. Her ECI care coordinator had noticed a bruise on her hip and called on us. Turns out this lady had been harboring alot against me. My daugher has mild special needs, and she told CPS that I had Munchausen by Proxy syndrome. (I found all of this out through another source, not CPS)
Needless to say our investigator was a WITCH! She came into my house looking for some reason to take my children away from me. She harassed me for over 30 minutes. Made feel so badly that I couldn't even nurse my son while she was there She insisted that my house wasn't clean, "no carpet was showing," etc, etc. My husband and I had just picked up and vacuumed the day before! But when questioned about the state of our house, she skirted the issue. Just threatened that our house "had better be clean."
So, if you're expecting CPS for any reason, do yourself a favor and clean like you're expecting someone important because IME, they will fault you for any small thing they can think of.
my guess would be them looking for rotten food, bugs, dirty diapers(feces), and trash that the children are exposed to.
And excessive clutter that would cause harm (falling objects, not being able to get through room or hall without falling).
Or no clean clothes or linens in the home.
SWs are supposed to help people and you cant help them if you alienate them.
i know i have said this before and its not a popular opinion but CPS is not out to get you. they dont want to take kids from their parents.
Great. We had bugs recently - roaches seem to have gotten in with our hedgehog last year, and they became a problem before we realized they were there. Since we actually were dealing with them, I can't see any reason why they should be a problem, yk? It just took a while as we prefer to avoid having toxic chemicals in our home, whenever possible.
if a sw came to my house and acted like that i would have gone right over her head (i might have called her office right then and there) and talked to her supervisor about her behavior and request another social worker. if no one ever reports her they will never know and its important that they know. SWs are supposed to help people and you cant help them if you alienate them.
ftr your house would have to be dirty not just messy or cluttered for cps to remove your children and even then it would probably be only until you cleeaned.
have any of you ever seen wife swap? there are a few houses there where cps might remove the children till the parents cleaned.
i know i have said this before and its not a popular opinion but CPS is not out to get you. they dont want to take kids from their parents. they have to many children as it is they arent looking for more. its not like they get a bonus for every child they remove from a home. a lot of the time they help families who need their help but dont want it. the hours are long, the pay sucks, and people treat them like crap. not to mention it is probably one of the most emotionally draining jobs you could have. i am not saying there are no bad social workers i just cant imagine how anyone who didnt genuinly want to help people would last a week as a social worker.