My husband hit our puppy - Page 2

[betsyj]

Of course puppies should be used to being handled. But they also should be able to get the sleep they need undisturbed in a safe place. Baby puppies need as much sleep as human infants and to allow kids unfettered access is unfair to the puppy and sets up the whole relationship for failure.

A puppy this age growling is not right. But that doesn't mean kids should be allowed to man handle puppies and expect perfect behavior. My goodness-when we bring a dog into our lives they should not be the only one who accepts modifications of basic behavior.

[SevenVeils]

I am by no means talking about manhandling. I am always one of the most vocal ones on the dogs-alone-with-kids threads, saying that toddlers should not ever be allowed to "harass" dogs or puppies, pinch, pull, poke, wrestle, jump on, or otherwise.

But unless you intend to sequester your dog every time it sleeps for the rest of its life, it needs to be accustomed to, thus tolerant of, being disturbed. And even a large dog needs to tolerate being picked up even if it isn't in the mood, in case of injuries later in life.

And even if you DO intend to sequester your dog every time it sleeps, that is not a realistic expectation. What if the toddler (yours or a friend's) accidentally falls on the sleeping dog? I need to know that my dog will not snap under that circumstance.

What if you make some area (the crate or dog bed) "off limits" to humans when the dog is occupying it? "Because dogs need a space that is their own"? And then your 4 year old's ball bounces into the bed area or into the crate, and the child goes to retrieve it? I need to know that my dog will not snap under that circumstance.

If a puppy isn't used to being picked up, it will grow into a dog which is not tolerant of being picked up.

Not a good recipe.

[number572]

Originally Posted by sarathan

Yes, dh lets him out but he likes to go to the bathroom, shave and get dressed first. THEN he lets puppy out.

A puppy won't know that your husband wants to take care of himself first. The puppy is trying everything it knows to get your husband's attention so it doesn't pee in its own bed. Thats pretty cold of your dh imo.

Would he let a human baby cry for 30 minutes while he shaved and then hit it b'c it cried? No difference really. Sorry but thats really mean.

[betsyj]

Again I think we agree SV on the basics here. I routinely teach my dog to accept handling and always have. But puppies do deserve the chance to get good amounts of sleep without always having to accept handling 24/7. I am sure that is what you are saying also.

To me if a dog goes into his crate to sleep he deserves to be respected in his space.

[SevenVeils]

Yeah, I'm not talking about a child pursuing a dog or intentionally waking it up when it is sleeping. But my kids are allowed into the crate and if the dog is laying in there he will make room for them or vacate on the rare occasions that the baby enters it.

[mistymama]

While I would be horrified about dh hitting the dog - I probably wouldn't rehome for that alone. I would talk with dh, and possibly take on more of the responsibility of the dog myself. I don't think your dh has to be a "dog person" or in love with the dog for it to stay in the family. For instance, my dh is just NOT a dog person. It took me a few years of working on him to agree to a dog - and even then it was with the understanding that I would do ALL dog care. I do everything, and while dh does not dislike the dog, he's not really bonded to him and does not do much with him. I'm ok with that - ds and I get lots of enjoyment out of him, and I can't force dh to be a dog lover! Tolerating the dog & occasionally petting/snuggling with him is fine by me.

Honestly, I would be more concerned with the growling at your kids. That's a red flag at 9 weeks old. Honestly, at that age I think the puppy should be getting used to being picked up, handled, played with, etc by your kids. This is the age to get him used to being touched all over, toe nails clipped, toys taken, etc. The growling would be a very big problem for me.

[gumby74]

Originally Posted by sarathan

But he did say he doesn't like the dog or really even want the dog anymore and will probably just ignore him.

I think this is the part that makes me worry the most about them keeping the dog. He has stated he doesn't want the dog and plans on ignoring it. I suppose it's better than hitting the dog, but the dog will always be able to sense that he is not wanted. Give him to a family where everyone wants him. As far as the growling behavior goes, I reall wonder if something happened to the dog. Temperment is more often than not about the owners and training than it is about the dog.

[Carson]

I am not a dog person, but I do take excellent care of our dog (and she's grown on me, I admit!). I really think that puppy belongs in a family where everyone is on board with care and training.

Our neighbors got a dog. The H wanted it, the wife did not. They did not put time into training it, walking it, or teaching it to socialize with kids. The dog has spent the last year and a half either isolated in a back mudroom or outside on a tie out. The best : part is when they put the dog inside so the kids can play in the yard. It breaks my heart - the kids are learning poor examples of taking care of a pet, and the poor dog is neglected.