mommies_2_be - my dp and i discussed having kids probably on our second or third date. after we moved in together we had more discussions and figured out a timeline and who would carry first etc.. i will admit i never thought i would settle down OR have kids but once we had talked about it i realized that i did. from the time we started dating to having our son was 4 years.
as for your situation, firstly,
i can't believe your partner told you she was happy about your m/c!!! i'm sorry to have to say this but it doesn't sound like a healthy relationship to me at all. my opinion is you need to have a long talk and figure out what path you want to take - with children or not. and if your partner is adamant that she doesn't want kids well, you have some decision making to do.
again and good luck!