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May Pagan Circle - Page 7

post #121 of 465
Morning mamas. I hope everyone is doing well. I am so glad it is Friday!
post #122 of 465
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Originally Posted by brendon View Post
I am cleaning my bedroom. *ugh* why does our room room have to be the dumping ground for everything?
My bedroom is the place we all hangout as a family. Talking, reading and sometimes watch t.v., so it can get a bit messy, but my living room seems to be the dumping ground for everything!
post #123 of 465
Went to get the puppa dog off her run and oh my, it is so warm out already! Another fun day gardening and cleaning the yard! woohoo!

While my dh doesn't consider himself pagan, he is happy to participate in rituals and other events. We are actually looking at taking a spirituality course at our church cause dh realized he isn't really spiritual. I am very happy he is considering this!

Off to get Gilli on the bus and then some coffee : Happy Day to All!
post #124 of 465
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Originally Posted by BellaLuna Rayne View Post
Morning.

I think my H is on his way back to the states now. He still has not contacted anybody to my knowledge, so I don't know for sure where he is going. Most of his family is on my side, so hopefully they can talk some sense into him and figure out what's wrong.
He's being quite the UAV about the whole thing if you ask me : Hopefully he will take this time to think about what he really wants, cause it sounds like he has no bloody idea.

Quote:
Originally Posted by singin_angel View Post
I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one having challenges with group work. It is a little sad, because I like having a religious community where we can support each other.
Nup definitely not.. But then I have noticed that the more visible pagans tend to be.. well... fruitcakes? LMAO That's why I found THIS group :

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dreamy View Post
as well as "Riverdance: Live from Radio City Music Hall", simply because I love it and can't watch my VHS copy anymore (no VCR)
hehehe love Riverdance
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Does anyone here work in a professional setting? If so, do you in any way incorporate your pagan identity into your personal style?
Well, I worked as a psychiatric nurse for a long time... Jewelry was pretty much a dumb idea except a wedding ring (targets to grab, weapons to choke with etc) So during that point in my life I just didn't.

Quote:
Originally Posted by gun View Post

Question for all about paganism!! ( Got to sneak in one every now and again!)
If anyone is partnered and their SO doesn't share their beliefs, do you feel self conscious about your practices? If you did feel awkward in the past about it, how long did it take to feel more comfortable?
I'm lucky I spose... my ex was curious about paganism at least. And my DH, well I met him in a #wicca chat on mIRC back in 99

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Originally Posted by Maiasaura View Post
cari, don't they all do that? IME men are generally juvenile that way.
Hehe ok then you might be able to tolerate him lol.

Quote:
thank you! now to figure out childcare...my brain is fried. did i post to y'all the two possible sections they offer? it's abysmal. doesn't fit within ds's school schedule at all
A way will be found mama!


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egads, really, mamas? how many of you have the bedroom as a mess? my bedroom is my sanctuary. that's the one room that's relatively neat, if covered in dust like the rest of the house
I think I may change the focus of my 'settling in' & unpacking and do OUR room first.. maybe that's part of my feeling of 'funk'? Maybe I would feel more centered & grounded if MY space was not so chaotic. Will work on THAT tomorrow and report back

We are also going over to the parents house tomorrow, dad & dh are building a 'rat hilton' for our pets hehehe. It's going to be something like this .. before we go over I MUST stop off somewhere so we can get a mothers day pressie for daims mum.. she totally rocks I'm thinking a special bead for her pandora bracelet and maybe the digital photo keychain I saw in a sale flyer

Mothers' day just isn't the same now, knowing my momma can't call me (until I moved ot Aus and got a day ahead of her, she would ALWAYS beat me to calling her mothers day morning!)
post #125 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by gun View Post
Dreamy - glad you found some good things to buy. Don't get overwhelmed by feeling you need to make a decision about which type of pagan you are. The more you explore, you will know your path.
Thanks for the reminder that it's OK to take my time. I feel a little sad when I see you all celebrating Ostara or Beltaine without taking part, but I don't intend on jumping into anything without of full understanding of the meaning behind it, and what it could mean to me.


Quote:
Originally Posted by gun View Post
Question for all about paganism!! ( Got to sneak in one every now and again!)
If anyone is partnered and their SO doesn't share their beliefs, do you feel self conscious about your practices? If you did feel awkward in the past about it, how long did it take to feel more comfortable?
DH isn't the spiritual seeker that I am, but he's gets very interested when spiritual topics come up. We were both raised Catholic, and got married in a Catholic church mostly to please our families (some of them being very religious). At the time we were both uncertain about whether or not we wanted to go back to the church or not.

He seemed just as fascinated as I was when I shared some of the information I found on the Christianity's origins in paganism. I'm now comfortable with the knowlege that my beliefs fit into the pagan "category", but I think DH could be considered agnostic. I'm a little stressed about how he would react if I start incorporating symbols, altars or rituals into our homelife, though likely I'd just get a few funny looks. I'm sure he'll understand that I want to provide some sort of spiritual richness to our son's life.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Maiasaura View Post
egads, really, mamas? how many of you have the bedroom as a mess? my bedroom is my sanctuary. that's the one room that's relatively neat, if covered in dust like the rest of the house
Our room is last on the priority list. The kitchen has to be clean, or else it becomes too overwhelming to prepare meals/prep lunches. The floor has to be tidy so DS doesn't trip all over the place as he toddles around, and bathrooms have to be clean in case he goes fishing in a toilet

At night, I usually go to bed when DS wakes up in his crib - so while DH holds him, I dash to brush my teeth, take off my clothes and throw them on the floor, put on PJs, try and resettle the covers a bit, then get into bed with DS who's been looking to nurse the whole time. Morning leaves zero time for tidying in there.
post #126 of 465
TGsIF peoples!

Quote:
Originally Posted by singin_angel View Post
I'm glad to hear that I'm not the only one having challenges with group work. It is a little sad, because I like having a religious community where we can support each other. I did practice as a solitary for sometime, but I did find it lonely at times and I missed the social aspect of the celebration - especially cakes and wine.
I'd love to find a circle here, but since I haven't I am so happy to have all of you!

I need to kick my behind into gear in terms of meditation. I recently found out that I have adrenal fatigue from all the stress that I have been through in the last few years. One of the recommendations is daily meditation or prayer. What a hint from the Gods :P
I like http://www.betterworldbooks.com/Magi...580911552.aspx
Quote:
Originally Posted by gun View Post
Hello everyone!! We are busy planning a party for DD's second birthday. Time just flew by there!! Spending the day with the fam and loads of rain. DH is making double chocolate cookies. : I was hoping to get to the store to buy stuff for the yard, but w/ DD getting over an awful cold, it will have to wait due to the rain. Early this morning we scored a train table for DD at a garage sale! Yay!!

Have a fun bday party!


Question for all about paganism!! ( Got to sneak in one every now and again!)
If anyone is partnered and their SO doesn't share their beliefs, do you feel self conscious about your practices? If you did feel awkward in the past about it, how long did it take to feel more comfortable?
I've always been open with dh. Whenever I have a new idea, or read a new book I talk to him about it, so he knows where I'm coming from. I told him that these were my beliefs, and as long as he accepted mine, I wouldn't judge his beliefs. It took some time, but he's come to a point on his own where our spiritual beliefs are very compatible. He's not persued religous or spiritual growth on his own, but is very accepting of mine. I find it funny that he's more vocal about it, for instance with co-workers he's very open about not believing in god, and I don't talk to very many of my friends about my beliefs.
It took me a year or two to really be secure enough in my choices to talk about them with conviction.


Dreamy-It's my hope that with everyone sharing how we celebrate Ostara, Beltane, etc, you and others who are new to paganism can get a more realistic view of it. When I was new to paganism, I wanted to jump in with both feet and have a firmly established practice. But, just like anything else, it takes time to make it part of you. The journey is the best part, kwim?

As far as looking "pagan" goes, sometimes it's easy to spot someone, lol. I satisfy myself with bits of jewelry I make, and clothes I make too. I have fun dressing by the "day's color" as per the Llewellyn calendar too. So, I look pretty normal ( I think!) I don't have a pentacle (gasp!) but I do have a Celtic symbol for spiritual rebirth
post #127 of 465
Thread Starter 
Wishing everyone a lovely Mother's Day (in case you won't be checking in here this weekend).

Mother's Day is very lonely for me but I'll try to keep myself busy with cleaning. Oh what fun. tee hee.

The weather is beautiful today! Makes me wish I had room for a hammock. I think we'll eat dinner outside (if it doesn't rain).
post #128 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by CariOfOz View Post
He's being quite the UAV about the whole thing if you ask me : Hopefully he will take this time to think about what he really wants, cause it sounds like he has no bloody idea.
No he really has no clue what he wants. He told my SIL that he "is unhappy, needs a change, something new." Oh and the best part "Iraq has changed me, its made me cold and I like it." When my SIL asked him why he liked being cold he said "it makes it easier not to care about hurting people."

She is so upset with him because he made her not tell me about his other yahoo, saying he would tell me and she believed him. She told him she wouldn't lie for him and was about to tell me when SHTF.

He has not called his family yet either. He tried calling my other SIL yesterday, left a message and never called back. I have no idea if he is still planning on going down there or if he is planning on coming here.

I am really worried, especially with all the comments he's made lately. Its not even about his lying anymore. I am seriously concerned for his mental health.

I feel helpless.
post #129 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by CariOfOz View Post
Nup definitely not.. But then I have noticed that the more visible pagans tend to be.. well... fruitcakes?

Hehe ok then you might be able to tolerate him lol.
hey now, i resemble that comment...well, sometimes i look utterly normal(ish), but...hmm. describe "visible Pagan"?

tolerate...that would be about the extent of it. i abhor that kind of male immaturity. but it seems to be rampant, so a modicum of acceptance would have to be in order, i (reluctantly) suppose. for my sanity. sigh.

Quote:
Originally Posted by BellaLuna Rayne View Post
Oh and the best part "Iraq has changed me, its made me cold and I like it." When my SIL asked him why he liked being cold he said "it makes it easier not to care about hurting people."

I am seriously concerned for his mental health.
yeah. that.
either he had a propensity for cruelty and coldness before, that the war just brought to the surface, or he has truly been changed by it, and not in a good way. either way, he's seriously effed up. i smell sociopathy. egads. poor you
post #130 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maiasaura View Post
yeah. that.
either he had a propensity for cruelty and coldness before, that the war just brought to the surface, or he has truly been changed by it, and not in a good way. either way, he's seriously effed up. i smell sociopathy. egads. poor you
Okay, so I totally just googled that and only like one or two of those points fit my husband.

He did not have a propensity for cruelty or coldness before he left, quite the opposite. He is the type of person who volunteers to do things for others, etc.

I think this is combat related. Oh and he has officially left, just don't know when he will get to his home state because that is where he is headed.
post #131 of 465
Bella - while he may not fit the full definition of sociopath, how he treats you is not right. Ask yourself what you would tell your best girlfriend if her husband was treating her this way. That may help you see more objectively how off this is.
post #132 of 465
bella, hugs hon. just my pov, of course, but sounds like a double whammy of ptsd and saturn return to me. eft was created to deal with ptsd in 'nam vets... maybe you can get one of his family to get him tuned into it. (and i promise that's the last time i'll mention either one...)


more newbies! huzzah and welcome, hop on in and dance! hope you'll join us for summer camp this year! squeee!
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post #133 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by gun View Post
Bella - while he may not fit the full definition of sociopath, how he treats you is not right. Ask yourself what you would tell your best girlfriend if her husband was treating her this way. That may help you see more objectively how off this is.
I would give her the same advice I am already getting, give it some time. He's obviously messed up from the war right now and needs some time to clear his head after this latest drama. I am gonna see what happens on this leave and go from there. Its really all I can do right now.


Quote:
Originally Posted by aweynsayl View Post
bella, hugs hon. just my pov, of course, but sounds like a double whammy of ptsd and saturn return to me. eft was created to deal with ptsd in 'nam vets... maybe you can get one of his family to get him tuned into it. (and i promise that's the last time i'll mention either one...)
I was thinking the same thing last night actually. Also, isn't mercury retrograde right now? That could explain some of this as well I suppose. He was doing really well when he was meditating and practicing grounding (he was going to a Pagan group), I don't think he still does it anymore.
post #134 of 465
yep, i meant to mention that the other day-- and it's retrograde in an air sign, which means the effed-upedness is manifesting in.... wait for it... COMMUNICATION and thoughts..... so, yeah. tripple whammy.

hugs.
post #135 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by aweynsayl View Post
yep, i meant to mention that the other day-- and it's retrograde in an air sign, which means the effed-upedness is manifesting in.... wait for it... COMMUNICATION and thoughts..... so, yeah. tripple whammy.

hugs.
Of course, always with communication. *sigh*
post #136 of 465
Bella- HUGE hugs chica. I'm so sorry you're getting put through this. I'm not really an "everything has a reason" person, but hopefully this is going to somehow prove to be the gateway to something wonderful. A friend of mine went through a total roller coaster experience (called off the wedding, lost a job, her dog died, her car got smashed, she had to sell her house, etc all in about two weeks) and then all of a sudden she found a new job (an amazing job) in a new city she had always loved but never been able to afford, found an amazing apartment there without even looking, bumped into a childhood sweetheart and found out they were both head over heels in love with each other, was adopted by a cat, etc. And again that happened over the course of a few weeks. It was totally out of blue (both the good and the bad) and no way to know that the roller coaster of suck was about to turn into the best thing ever. So hang on.

Oh, I suggested this in a different thread, but there is a book (anthology actually, edited by Chas Clifton) called Witchcraft Today Book Two. It has a chapter on pagans and the military and although you've said your partner isn't pagan perhaps that chapter might have some insights into ways to help him shift his understanding of his experiences? I know it'll take a lot of therapy and effort on his part, but people I know who have been in Iraq (especially on repeat tours) have said some of the same things your partner has (about being cold and liking it) and been able to "recover" over time.

This sort of personality change is not uncommon in a war scenario unfortunately... there are even rituals of re-integration for soldiers in many traditional cultures.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Dual religion families- when I met DH I was a questioning Catholic. He was also Catholic. We attended mass together, that sort of thing. So even though he was very open minded at the time and not nearly "as catholic" as my family, I was worried about what my shifting beliefs would do to our relationship. We had some rough spots but overall religion hasn't been a very divisive factor... we've been together since '93 and religion is just one of the many changes we've been through!

He currently describes himself as a "mystic christian" (think Thich Nach Hahn crossed with Thomas Merton with a solid dose of Irish folk tradition thrown in ) while I describe myself as an ecclectic kitchen witch. It can get a bit silly some months as we try to cover all the holiday/family tradition bases (Dec is basically one big party) but we attend a UU congregation so the girls have a consistant social religious community and we try to balance our responses to dd1's questions so she understands that different people believe different things and that that is ok, and that it's ok to question and change.

~~~~~~~~~~~~
visible pagans- oh my! So hard to describe and yet I see it clearly! You know, there is a series of books by Mercedes Lackey that are based on the adventures of Diana (Diane?) Tregarde... a sort of pagan protector/private eye/writer. They're a bit out of date, but fun. Anyway, in one section she is trying to explain to a non-pagan friend why so many "visible pagans" do seem a bit on the fruitcake end. It boils down to the idea that these people see/hear/feel/know something outside the norm and so they eventually adopt the labels put on this abnormal feeling/sensation ("freak", "crazy", "wacko", "nut job"). And then they discover that there is a good reason for their feelings/sensations and that their experiences are real and there is a community in which these things are normal and accepted. But by then they have spent so many years accepting and internalizing the perjoratives that they can't totally break free, or aren't comfortable breaking free, or don't have the general support to break free.

Sort of like a child who is called all sorts of names in school because they simply can't/don't conform to the normal school culture. And then in high school say they are finally diagnosed with a condition that completely explains the "problems" they've had and even given a way to "fix" those problems within a socially acceptable framework. And yet their confidence and self image is still shot from years of unfair perjorative treatment, and it takes time and effort and support (which may not be available) for them to move past the habits/assumptions/attitudes/behaviors they've adopted as a result of being misunderstood for so long.
post #137 of 465
Evening Mamas. just thought I would pop back in see if anyone is around. Today was a slow lazy day, I just hung out and read. Watched the hummingbirds fight over the feeders.
post #138 of 465
We had a nice day today! : Weather was warm, with a bit of rain and I got most of my yard work done.

I'll catch up later
post #139 of 465
can i just say that it's 105* out?

and i just came back from the bead store... heh. just sort of grabbed a few new things that drew me in... now i'm gonna try and figure out what they are....

ds is napping, and i sent in round one of my project, and dh is off at rehearsal, so... i guess i'll catch up!

i guess i should do yoga, but it's so hot. i'm not adjusted to that just yet.... gasp.


re: partners & religion... i've basically been pagan-ish since i was little (well, when i was really little, i was greek-mythology-ish, whatever one would call that. i was alllll about the greeks). dh was brought up catholic, but very early on decided that didnt really make sense to him. he was never anything but open about practices/thoughts/feelings/etc.... and we've had some great conversations. intellectually, if not wholly spiritually, we're on the same page, more or less, and where we're not, it's not because he has some other belief, but because he isnt really... bothered one way or the other. (parents, not that you asked, but my mom is so funny. she called me from the store the other day and, not wanting to say "beltaine" over the phone asked me: "what are the colors for this holiday?" so she could get me flowers that would be fitting. )

bedrooms... well... we basically live in ours, since we're staying with my mom while dh finishes grad school, so all our (very few) worldly posessions are in one 12x12 room... it's exceptionally tidy because there's really no other choice!

visual signs of paganism... nope, not professional here, lol! but when i was, i dont think there was anything about anything i wore or had at work that really indicated that... i wear stones, not much into symbols (though i used to be! wore a lot of celtic knots or greek keys...). i did tend to bring in lots of cut flowers, though. if i was working now, i'd probably keep something seasonal at my desk that i would change... but it would be subtle... mainly cause i am.


(and, Dreamy-- if you're feeling impatient, just wait for camp! it's an awesome jump-start into your figuring that all out! you'll see. hugs!)


happy full moon, and weekend all!
i fully plan on not touching the computer alllll weekend long!!!
wish me luck. <wink>
xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxxox
post #140 of 465
Quote:
Originally Posted by Maiasaura View Post
hey now, i resemble that comment...well, sometimes i look utterly normal(ish), but...hmm. describe "visible Pagan"?
LOL ok.. I suppose I should have been more specific.. You know the person with at least 5 pentacles, one dinner plate sized and going WELL out of their way to look dark& mysterious? That's the person I envisioned
Quote:
tolerate...that would be about the extent of it. i abhor that kind of male immaturity. but it seems to be rampant, so a modicum of acceptance would have to be in order, i (reluctantly) suppose. for my sanity. sigh.
Trust me it WOULD be worth it for a guy like DH . He's really not THAT bad... he's very good about NOT doing these things in public so at least there is no embarrassment factor
[quote]


Quote:
Originally Posted by aweynsayl View Post
can i just say that it's 105* out?

and i just came back from the bead store... heh. just sort of grabbed a few new things that drew me in... now i'm gonna try and figure out what they are....
EW .. a bead store sounds like the PERFECT place to spend the day then hehehe.

Off to mothers day shop for MIL, then the men are going to build our rats a hotel so we can get them out of the aquarium hehehe. Will post pics once it's built .. probably when I finally get around to my housewarming
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