All worldviews - would you share your coming of age ceremonies?

[Callimom]

I am looking for inspiration to develop a coming of age ceremony for my son and our church (UU) is open to being inspired by other faiths/world views.
I wondered if you would share how your church/religion honours young people as they transition to adulthood.

Thanks in advance
Karen

[smeisnotapirate]

I'm not sure what of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is really applicable to your situation. At that point in a young Jew's life, they are responsible for observing the commandments that G-d gave to us in the Torah (as opposed to their parents being responsible before bar/bat mitzvah age).

Are you looking for rituals? Or more of a mindset? I tutor the 12-13 year olds, and we always tell the parents that it's time to "renegotiate the contract." The child can expect more freedom, but also has more responsibility that comes along with that freedom.

If you want to be more specific about what you're looking for, maybe I can help more.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate

I'm not sure what of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah is really applicable to your situation. At that point in a young Jew's life, they are responsible for observing the commandments that G-d gave to us in the Torah (as opposed to their parents being responsible before bar/bat mitzvah age).

Are you looking for rituals? Or more of a mindset? I tutor the 12-13 year olds, and we always tell the parents that it's time to "renegotiate the contract." The child can expect more freedom, but also has more responsibility that comes along with that freedom.

If you want to be more specific about what you're looking for, maybe I can help more.

I guess I am looking for information on the process leading up to the ceremony, and the rituals involved. While the content of the ceremony will be different, I think it is interesting that so many faith traditions/cultures have coming of age ceremonies which include some kind of journey leading to an affirmation of faith which is often both public and personal.

I went through confirmation in the Anglican church and it wasn't very meaningful to me in part because I was beginning to really doubt Christianity at that time. I know it can be pivotal for young people and would like to learn more about how faiths celebrate this time for young people.

thanks!
Karen

[smeisnotapirate]

Leading up to Bar/Bat Mitzvah (in our congregation - every one is different), our students study with me (the cantor(ial soloist, in my case)) for a year. They study prayers in our liturgy and learn to properly say the Hebrew and chant the melodies. They also learn to chant from the Torah (there is a proscribed way of chanting the melodies that is taught, as well as being able to read the Hebrew with no vowels) and the Haftarah. We additionally require our children to complete a year-long service project of their choice, focusing on the concept of "tikkun olam" (repairing the world), and to write a speech about an issue that they hold dear to them and their religious journey up to b'nai mitzvah.

After all of this is complete (one year of prep), they present everything they've done to the congregation and their family by leading a service with the rabbi and I. They lead the prayers and chanting, chant from the Torah and Haftarah, and present their speech and d'var Torah (kinda like a sermon).

After the service, we do what all good Jews do - party and eat.

I grew up Catholic, and went through Confirmation in the church. I actually think that being part of the daisy chain at commencement in high school was more meaningful to me than my confirmation, but . Maybe it was a harbinger of the future.

[Callimom]

Originally Posted by smeisnotapirate

Leading up to Bar/Bat Mitzvah (in our congregation - every one is different), our students study with me (the cantor(ial soloist, in my case)) for a year. They study prayers in our liturgy and learn to properly say the Hebrew and chant the melodies. They also learn to chant from the Torah (there is a proscribed way of chanting the melodies that is taught, as well as being able to read the Hebrew with no vowels) and the Haftarah. We additionally require our children to complete a year-long service project of their choice, focusing on the concept of "tikkun olam" (repairing the world), and to write a speech about an issue that they hold dear to them and their religious journey up to b'nai mitzvah.

After all of this is complete (one year of prep), they present everything they've done to the congregation and their family by leading a service with the rabbi and I. They lead the prayers and chanting, chant from the Torah and Haftarah, and present their speech and d'var Torah (kinda like a sermon).

After the service, we do what all good Jews do - party and eat.

I grew up Catholic, and went through Confirmation in the church. I actually think that being part of the daisy chain at commencement in high school was more meaningful to me than my confirmation, but . Maybe it was a harbinger of the future.

Thanks so much for sharing.
Is this process done with peers or is it an individual journey?

[smeisnotapirate]

Originally Posted by Karenwith4

Thanks so much for sharing.
Is this process done with peers or is it an individual journey?

In our congregation, it's individual. One-on-one with me (and my FAVORITE part of the job ). In many congregations, it's half-class and half-individual work.