I agree with a lot of things she says and I've been trying for a while to get in that mindset.
I decided we (as a society) were being entirely irrational when one day, I was exhausted and fell asleep and DD's nurse let DS outside to play. I guess he was bothering her and there were some kids outside about his age. She knew I needed sleep and sent him outside rather than wake me up.
When I woke up, I didn't hear DS in the house and I panicked and flew downstairs and asked where DS was. She told me he was outside playing with some kids. I just about lost it on her! I kept my cool though and went outside to check on him. He was just in the side yard connecting the 2 apartments, playing with a 5 year old girl. No harm done.
Then I went back inside and I realized she had opened the window so she could see and hear him. He wasn't in danger. It just never occured to me that a 4 1/2 year old could be safe playing outside alone. DD's nurse is my mom's age. All of us kids played outside by the time we could walk. A lot of times there were older kids to watch us, but they were all of 7 or 8 years old. By the time I was 5 I was playing across the apartment complex and going up and down the street. By the time I was 6, I was walking to school, about 6 blocks away. No doubt her daughter did too.
So I never said anything to her. Instead I thought long and hard about it. I let him play outside alone the next day and the next day.... I can always hear or see him and I made friends with the couple next door. They are grandparents and their granddaughter was the one DS was playing with. They are nice and the grandpa and I compare oxygen supply companies and products like geeks.
They adore DD and had a niece with CP who died a long time ago, so they know what I'm going through.
I think part of the problem is we're not as friendly and neighborly as we used to be. Everywhere I've lived, we haven't made friends with our neighbors. Nobody seems to want to talk and I'm quite shy really. I don't know if it's like this for other people. So I've been trying to talk to everyone and get to know them. And in turn, they learn who my kids are and if there's ever a problem, I know they would come to me, like if DS fell and scraped his knee and was crying on the sidewalk. And I would do the same for them. It used to be that everyone kind of kept an eye on everyone else's kids. If you looked out your window and saw little Tommy from up the street talking to some man you'd never seen, you'd walk outside and find out what was going on. You wouldn't just ignore it. It's easier to ignore when you don't know the kid or his parents.
I talked with DS about his boundries....don't go in the street, don't play in the puddle (it gets deep when it rains), don't play around the dumpster, ect. I just had the "stranger talk" with him a few days ago. I don't want to scare him with stranger danger. I told him not to go with strangers, not to let them in the house, not to take things from them, ect. I did NOT tell him not to talk to them though. I don't want my kid thinking everyone is a bad guy and they can hurt you just from talking to you. In fact, I told him if he's ever lost, the best person to find to help him is another mommy. I told him if anyone ever tried to take him, he's supposed to yell, "This person is not my mommy/daddy!".
When he's older and I'm sure all of that has sunk in, I'll let him out of my sight.
). It was just a block down a quiet street, but some people freaked. By 10 or so she was wandering around downtown Davis with a friend for a few hours, and by 12 she was flying solo cross country, even changing planes. Once she had a cell phone I really had no worries...
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