Too much free time????

[AAK]

This will sound weird, but do you feel that your child has too much free time with hs. Lately, Anna seems BORED. She goes through her "school" stuff very quickly, and to give her extra simply to keep her busy seems mean. She doesn't want extra. At the same time, she is getting grouchy in the afternoons. I think she misses the people of her old school. She doesn't want to go back, but she does miss people. We haven't had any luck finding a group to hang with. There is one possibility, but they are already done meeting this year and the timing didn't work for this year anyways.

I would love to know what you do to fill the time! I actually have stuff I HAVE to do. . .laundry etc. I am not a clean freak by any stretch of the imagination, but I do need basic things done. I could give her more responsibility that way, but that also seems "cruel". She isn't my personal servant and she does do her jobs, etc most the time without too much whining.

This is compounded by the terrible weather we are having this spring. She is allowed to ride her bike (within a grid) by herself. But, windy, rainy weather doesn't call to her.

UGGGGGH!

Amy

[briansmama]

My ds is really social and would love to play with others all of the time. We have found a great homeschooling group that meets this need, but it took years of trying different groups (he never went to preschool so we were trying back then).

Personally, I believe that children need a lot of free time; this is a major reason why we choose to homeschool.

Maybe she needs to decompress and get used to having so much free time after attending school? I know that schooled children are not used to having so much free time.

I suggest that you keep trying to find a group for park days and/'or a fun activity/class that she can take with a group of other h'schoolers to fill that need.

HTH!

[momtokea]

Does she have enough things to do at home?
My girls spend time doing art and crafts, cooking, baking, knitting, crocheting, reading books and magazines, playing dollhouse or Playmobil, building with Lego or Knex, having a playdate, playing a boardgame, watching a movie, playing Wii, playing on computer, writing plays and performing them, playing the piano, visiting grandma, doing chores, etc. I limit screen time, but they have free access to everything else. They are never bored and often feel like they don't get enough of the above mentioned things.

[Dar]

I think it's important that people have free time so that they can learn for themselves what they enjoy doing. Sometimes we hit lulls during which we do a lot of sort of hangout around feeling sort of uncomfortable and not knowing what to do, but then we always seem to find stuff....

[NoraB]

Sometimes boredom is a "brewing" period. I think it's important for kids to learn to conquer their boredom on their own.

Also, I don't think it's bad to have a child help out more around the house. It's not awful for children to help unload the dw or do laundry. When kids are working w/ parents, it's not a burden. I think it's time to be together. Before formal schooling swallowed up most of the day, kids helped out their parents in various tasks and also had time to play. Being an important contributing member of the household does NOT make a child a servant! It helps them understand that they ARE a valuable member of the family and they can help the family run smoothly. JMO.

[mama-aya]

I agree with Nora B. Boredom isn't bad, and neither is helping out the family.

Drudging through chores is a bummer, sure, but making salad while Mom makes supper and you're both chatting and listening to music is fun, and folding clothes together is more fun than flopping around the house being lonely and bored!

At our house if kids are complaining about being bored they're given a chore. Oddly, my kids are hardly ever bored....

If she's grouchy in the afternoons it could be because she's tired, and needs more sleep at night.
Or maybe making afternoon snack into a special little time, with a little treat and a chapter book or a card game or something. Someitmes taking a few special minutes out frees up the rest of the afternoon, you know?
What about play dates? Can you invite some of her old school friends over after school?
Or handwork. Does she like to sew or embroider or knit?
Sometimes my boys like to lie in bed or build a blanket fort and listen to books on tape in the afternoon when they're tired but not sleepy.

[muttix2]

We haven't hit the boredom stage yet. Oldest ds is 5 so I'm sure it will be coming soon. But I'm trying to avoid it by providing lots of things to do. We have a lot of various toys (Legos, toy cars, action figures), puzzles, books, paper and drawing supplies. They can watch tv or dvds when I approve it. We listen to music and dance. If the weather is good enough, we go outside. I believe giving options is the key to avoiding boredom.

[darcytrue]

We don't get out a whole lot but my DD will play by herself very well or with her older brother. They love to go outside and explore a lot and ride their bikes. I also will do lapbooking with them. Right now we just started one and they both are enjoying it. I am short on patience so lapbooking doesn't happen often around here but it's fun when I find the time to do it with them and it gives us all more time to spend together and for some reason it doesn't seem like school work to them, which helps.

Have you tried looking online at Yahoo Groups for a group in your area?

[waiflywaif]

I agree that there's pretty much no such thing as too much free time. I'd investigate whether she wants a social outlet or just a "something to do" outlet. If it's the former, hopefully you can find a group, however small---if it's the latter, I'd try a ton of different hobbies and crafts and other pursuits until something "sticks."

[scoobymummy]

how do you do it?

I agree that boredom is a good thing and that children need to learn to entertain themselves........but how do you get them to DO that? My 6 year old dd hates playing by herself...she follows me around like a shadow. If I tell her I need to do something and she needs to find something to do, she goes and bugs her older brother until he blows up. she gets lots of one on one attention...I've put a chart on the wall with pictures of activities that she can do on her own...I've set up a craft table, an easel.....she's driving me bananas...

I do feel bad for her. She' an extrovert in a family of introverts.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

[AAK]

Thanks for all the suggestions. I am pretty sure that she is in need of "people" more often. Today we tried a homeschool co-op, but it really is a co-op instead of a group. We are looking for people, not a school. Anna and I had a good conversation afterwards and I am sure that we just need to find a good group of PEOPLE to hang with sometimes. She does have friends from public school, but the playdates are usually on the weekend because of parents who work, etc.

We have lots to do here, putting on plays is one of her favorite things to do. She is actually in a play that starts pretty soon. She has fortunately noticed that a lot of the kids in the community theater groups around town homeschool too, so I am encouraging her to get to know them.

Amy

[catholic74]

I will begin homeschooling next year, but I already know all I have to do is keep her busy until about 3:30 p.m. when all the kids in the neighborhood get off the bus. They all run around playing every day until dinner time. They're a great bunch of kids. That will be my time to relax, watch my tv shows, get dinner started, etc...

[transformed]

: My kids are totally bored. TOTALLY.

[darcytrue]

Originally Posted by AAK

Thanks for all the suggestions. I am pretty sure that she is in need of "people" more often. Today we tried a homeschool co-op, but it really is a co-op instead of a group. We are looking for people, not a school.

That's the only thing that disappointed me about our co-op. I joined last spring and this past year was sort of boring IMO. The only social gatherings they had were once a month for roller skating or bowling and we never made any of those dates because of something that was usually going on or me having to work. It was really hard to meet new people and get to know anyone in order to make friends. We went a whole year and nothing. It's a religious group and everyone has friends in church and it was hard to make friends. We aren't members of a church right now. I feel like we just don't fit in anywhere. Now it's summer again. We may skip a co-op next year since I'm expecting a baby in Sept and then try again with a new co-op the following year but we will see.

We have fun at the local YMCA doing a homeschool PE class but it's only every other week, so it's not often enough really and my kids really love it. Plus, the parents all sit around and mingle while the kids are in class. It's really neat. I'll miss that this summer.

[Momma Aimee]

ideal hands are the devils workshop

kintting, sewing, baking. cleaning, crafts, books ....

start making christmas gifts NOW ... look for idea,s learn to do something new.

I am never bored and my bf homeschools 6 of her 7 (soon to be 9) children -- adn they are never bored .. the girls do art (painting etc) the cook from scratch, they sew they knit they read .. they clean.

I personally do see any porblem with giving her more reponibluity around the house. it doesn't have to be "drugery and chorse" it can be "this is what i do to help out" and if the child is cleaning kitchen or helping with dinner while mom is cooking (or child cooking while mom cleans ) it is "life"

a child, even a teen, should have tons of "free" time to do what they want -- but that time should be active. play, reading, cooking, sewing, crafts, building with legos -- whatever their mind and hearts should be occupied.

how about yoga DVDs or something like that?

journaling -- creating characters -- play or story not necessary -- a folder of chacters with their own "data" pages can become a story later if the child wants to -- complete with drawings of homes and clothing ....

[Annikate]

It's important for kids to feel like they are an integral part of the family. I have found that by giving them "special jobs" that they can do it helps them to feel a "part of" and not so "alone."

You didn't mention how old your dd is. I think free time is important for kids of all ages, but particularly young children. It gives them time to develop their own imaginations and way of relating to the world.

Someone else mentioned crafts. My dd enjoys anything crafty and will work on her own for hours on something if I pre-plan it well. Also, something that can be worked on in succession - a little bit today, more tomorrow, until the finished product is done in a few days' time.

Can you start a local h'schooling group where you are?